To want to sell this house!

[Seaviewsunshine]

So we bought a house 18 months ago. A big lovely house in a dream village, primarily so our DS could start school where we wanted him to be. But to do that we had to max out everything (huge mortgage and use all our savings) and now we’re struggling to afford it and have very little disposable income. A few factors in play here, DH diagnosed with a chronic illness after being poorly for a couple of years meant I had to step down my job and I now hardly earn anything, a complete house renovation which we hadn’t planned on doing, naivity that we could live on nothing and somehow be happy! Our marriage is suffering as my poor DH is going all the house renovations whilst working full time and we have 2 small kids (DS 4 & DD 2) who are busy!! We have no money for anything fun and the smallest expense is a worry. Do we stick it out and hope things get better?! Or downsize considerably and hope that alleviates the pressure. Realistically this would mean relocating DS school, making some big concessions on the location/features of house and for me to find a new job.

I x-posted with your extra details but it's a really tough call. I would still say look seriously at moving. What does your DH want to do?

He doesn’t like quitting and having done so much of the work himself that’s how he views moving. But...he sees we’re struggling and that needs fixing too.

Can you post a more detailed budget breakdown? There have been other threads where posters have been able to identify savings or identify areas of spend that could be cut back a bit. It’s hard to advise without knowing if that extra £400 would make a huge difference to your lifestyle or not. That money might make the difference between watching every penny and enjoying life but only you can make the decision as to the balance between having the cash now and potentially eating away at your equity (once fees,stamp duty etc are taken into account) and making the compromises you mention to do it.

Have you got any scope to remortgage now you’ve done some of the work. If equity has gone up it might push you into a more favourable LTV and interest rate.

You need to sit down and do the maths. The actual cost of moving house versus staying where you are.
Only then will you see whether it is worth it, obviously if you down size considerably this would probably be the best option. I would do it in a heart beat, he stress, illness and pressure will become unbearable. It is a stack of cards, and one more pressure may well take you down.
Put the house on the market and choose a house your dh doesnt need to work on, and prioritise his recovery

People who are suggesting a lodger/air b and b, seriously who would want to pay to live or holiday in a house that resembles the before houses in DIY SOS! Let alone rent it on a permanent basis.

It sounds like you’re on the cusp of making it work. Have you gone through every tip on money saving expert? Are you claiming tax free childcare to reduce your childcare to the max? I think posting your budget could be a good idea - people might be able to eek out another few ££.

Evening job for you?

Move. Once one thing goes, there's another, then another. I am waiting for an emergency plumber to come this evening to stop the water that is dripping down our sitting room wall. We can't find the source but logically it has to be the fully tiled shower in the room above. So that'll have to be ripped out, pipes sorted, new shower put in, the plaster etc in the sitting room redone and so it goes on. Our insurance company are not entirely sure that we're covered despite having building insurance, we'll find out tomorrow.

The kitchen ceiling is bowing and we are just waiting for it to come crashing down. We simply don't have the dosh to keep this old house standing. It's beautiful, but for the last few years I have developed a dislike of it as it just eats all our spare money (and the unspare money too).

Get out while it's still habitable, even if it's not perfect! People like to think they can 'put their mark' on their home, so let them.

Oh no Jux that’s sounds stressful! That’s what I worry about, like there’s always something hidden...but I’d like to think with all the heating, electrics, most walls, roof etc that the risk is less!

I’ve managed to get some casual work with a friend over the summer months so that will help in the meantime and DH has suggested he could look for a new job to lift his salary a bit. Obviously we’d make sure he was better first!! I’ve also done the number crunching and we’re now know what sort of budget we’d have for a new house and what that means realistically.

Thank you for all your suggestions.