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Original poster

Repeal the 8th

891 replies

SnowWhitesRestingBitchFace · 10/04/2018 20:30

So DH and I are currently visiting my DF and DStepM in Southern Ireland (where I grew up).

Just answered the door to a couple who are looking for support in the referendum and wanted us to pledge that we would vote no.

No for context I am just 6 weeks away from giving birth to DC3 (so clearly very heavily pregnant) and they still had the audacity to argue with me when I said I didn't agree with them and I supported any woman's right to decide what happens to her body.

They started trying to show me pictures of 10 week old babies in the womb (not necessary obviously in the circumstances) and weren't pleased that I didn't agree with them given that I'm carrying a baby myself.

I'm sorry I don't really have an actual AIBU I just wanted to rant a bit and show support for the people who have to face this absolute shit every day until the referendum. We're going home to the UK on Thursday so I won't have it all thrown in my face anymore but I just think the guilt tripping is horrendous 😞

OP posts:
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mikado1 · 14/04/2018 21:51

Oh ffs.

ItsNachoCheese · 14/04/2018 22:03

I cant believe in this day and age a woman isnt allowed to choose what happens with her own body. Im scottish and im horrified irish women dont have access to the same services. I really do hope you get the vote you want. I would like to donate to the fund together for yes, am i able to?

theymademejoin · 14/04/2018 22:33

@ItsNachoCheese - you can't donate but you can buy some merchandise. Here are a couple of options for shops: www.togetherforyes.ie/shop/

www.abortionrightscampaign.ie/shop/All-products-c19917034

theymademejoin · 14/04/2018 22:34

@ItsNachoCheese - and as an Irish woman, I would like to thank you and all the other non-Irish who are supporting us.

Eighttimeseight · 14/04/2018 23:38

I'm disgusted at the No posters - only saw them in my area this evening. What do I say to my kids when they spot them?! Ages 7, 6 and 5..

theymademejoin · 14/04/2018 23:41

Tell them some people lie to get their own way and that it's not nice behaviour.

BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil · 15/04/2018 00:02

@ItsNachoCheese thankyou for your support. Its very kind and generous of you. Sincerely, thankyou.

@theymademejoin 'legitimate rape' a fallacy whereby if a woman falls pregnant from a rape it wasnt rape because her body would otherwise have stopped the pregnancy. ARRRGGHHHH!!

That bullshit makes me want to be sick. I'd sit them down and give them an education but I might end up using so many science-y words before I got to the point of legitimate rape being an oxymoron, my poor little head might explode.

I run the risk of this happening every time I try and think for myself. Its not as though I have a mind, an education and actually have a fully fledged uterus.

Argh, Sorry for ranting, ladies. Its been a long day, I'm actually trying to write a legal paper on repealing the eighth. It gets me fired up, and annoyed but if I come across as narky, its not aimed at anybody here. I am really liking the free flow of discussion and thoughts around this.

MiggledyHiggins · 15/04/2018 00:22

And I presume there won't be loads of people flying in to vote? No? Thought not. Equal marriage? Bring it on. Bodily autonomy for women? A step too far.

Bertrand, someone said to me that the reason the Marriage Equality referendum got so much support was that it was an issue that benefited men.

By the way, another way you can support the campaign is by sharing the links on your social media - get it out there far and wide for all the Irish citizens scattered to the wind to donate and support the campaign.

www.facebook.com/search/top/?q=in%20her%20shoes%20-%20women%20of%20the%20eighth

www.togetherforyes.ie/

theymademejoin · 15/04/2018 00:24

@BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil - I know this sounds terrible but the woman who said that to me is not terribly bright. She tends to believe anything that comes from a religious source.

It was part of a very long and rambling email she sent me once she discovered I was pro-choice. I decided not to engage as there was no way I would change her mind and I would only wind myself up.

BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil · 15/04/2018 00:57

@theymademejoin I completely understand and have friends who are the same.

Thats why i said in an earlier post that this referendum is 'marmite'. You are either going to vote yes, or youre not. I think the sad thing is that people dont understand what theyre voting for.

Its not a free-for-all 'Hello! welcome to Ireland! Your oxygen masks are located above your head and you can find your seatbelt somewhere around the place you planted your arse! We serve in-flight snacks and drinks and if you're curious you can now get an abortion on demand! Thankyou for flying '

No amount of 'no' campaigners will make me change my mind; as, I am sure that my friends who will be voting 'no' would be swayed by campaigners at their door. Its one of those things where you will or you wont. There really is no middle ground.

A repeal of the eighth isnt a fecking party for abortions. Its the first step forward for the recognition of womens' rights to their own bodies.

theymademejoin · 15/04/2018 01:06

@BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil - you're right for a lot of people but I do think there are people who can be swayed. My mother, despite being anti-abortion, has moved to a pro-choice position. Reasoned discussion that addresses their concerns is the way to sway them. Ranting about how all retain voters are misogynist neanderthals will not work ( not that I'm suggesting that is what you are doing!).

Figuring out which of them it's worth expending energy on is the hard bit.

Vexatious · 15/04/2018 01:56

Bertrand, someone said to me that the reason the Marriage Equality referendum got so much support was that it was an issue that benefited men.

But no one knew how many people were travelling home to vote on the gay marriage referendum until the day. It's not as though there's a Home to Vote register where people sign up. Is it not a bit presumptuous to assume weeks in advance that people won't be flying home this time too?

peanut2017 · 15/04/2018 07:35

@Vexatious there is a home to vote campaign hometovote.com

www.togetherforyes.ie delighted to see the money raised is well over the €500k mark

Anyone here know when the funds start getting used? Haven't seen any material from the repeal the 8th side? I'm not on social media so maybe I'm missing out on information although I have signed up to the newsletter.

Are there any big debates coming up on Irish tv?

heateallthebuns · 15/04/2018 08:49

I have explained the no posters to my kids aged 7. I said abortion stops a pregnancy when the lady can't have a baby at the moment, or the baby is very ill. It's not killing as it wasn't born yet. They seemed happy enough with that for the moment.

PinkbicyclesinBerlin · 15/04/2018 09:16

Converting someone from the no to the yes position I believe is all about bringing the real issues of abortion to their door. My sister had an abortion after being raped, I haven’t asked but I am willing to bet all of my parents and siblings will be voting yes based on that alone. Lots of people other the women involved in abortion, men particularly, you know “those” women they would have slept with themselves before they became the guardians of morality should be stopped from using abortion as their first form of contraception Hmm. I think breaking that down involves bringing the issue to their door, take away the othering.

BertrandRussell · 15/04/2018 09:46

“Is it not a bit presumptuous to assume weeks in advance that people won't be flying home this time too?”

Possibly. But.......

I do hope I am proved wrong.

theymademejoin · 15/04/2018 10:39

Some lovely posters up in Cork - lovin.ie/news/pro-life-posters-cork

CelticSelkie · 15/04/2018 10:43

This makes me cross too. Obviously loads of people flew home to vote for equality (marriage). It was a more glamorous struggle somehow. Sexier. Cooler.

I havent seen anybody rally the troops home to vote on this issue. As a poster up thread said gay marriage is one thing but women having autonomy over their own bodies is a step too far.

CelticSelkie · 15/04/2018 10:47

Ps if facebook was a straw poll it was obvious that a lot of people (men and women) were flying home to vote. So many announced it in fb and tagged other irish friends living abroad. I was heartened to see it at the time. I don't think too many gay men will be flying back for this one. I would be so happy to be wrong though. I dont think many men woyld fly back for this either, it will be women flying home to vote.

inniu · 15/04/2018 11:21

I think some people can and have been persuaded to repeal even though they have always been "prolife". The stories of the treatment of women whose much wanted children had fatal foetal abnormalities have swayed people.
People who would "allow" termination in the case of rape can realise that the only practical way to allow this is unrestricted abortion until 12 weeks because rape is hard to prove and the baby would be a toddler by the time there was a conviction.

People who read about the impact of the 8th amendment on cancer treatment for women.
Not everyone is open to discussion but some are.

Original poster
SnowWhitesRestingBitchFace · 15/04/2018 12:13

I'm so glad that this discussion is still going strong and I find it really interesting to see everyone's points of view or take on different aspects of the vote. I never considered the difference between the vote for gay marriage and the repeal before and now I've thought about how differently people are looking at them it's made me really sad as (in my opinion) this is a much more important issue.

OP posts:
Blackbirdblue30 · 15/04/2018 12:23

As just one woman looking at the terminations amongst my own friends and family- the ones I know about- I don't see how any anti choicer gets to be so devoid of empathy.
One pregnancy from date rape. One at 45 when her body couldn't hold another. One wanted but with Edwards syndrome. One from an awful manchild boyfriend which would have meant she was never free from him. One mistake at 19 which would have ruined her education. Another date rape at 18, her first time. All of them having to raise cash to go to England in secret and come back bleeding with no proper aftercare. I wish the anti choicers would have some respect for women and their lives and bodies, not putting the fetus above all like the woman is merely an incubator.

BananasAreTheSourceOfEvil · 15/04/2018 16:28

@Blackbirdblue30 I think youve really (for me) captured very eloquently what repealing the eighth is about. Your friends and family are the real faces of what legalised abortion will really be in Ireland. No one is going to set out to have sex, become pregnant and then have an abortion.

Years ago, one of my best friends borrowed some money from me, she said it was towards her business, but a few years ago told me what it was really for. I asked her why she didnt tell me... (would have given her anything anyway!) she replied she didnt know.

Theres such a social stigma. Even if the referendum doesnt pass, I'll still be educating my daughters about their rights to their own body.

heateallthebuns · 16/04/2018 12:01

Did many people fly home to vote though really? Can't have been that many.

Any updates on yes campaign in your area? Posters etc?

There seem alot less posters for either side than in marriage equality ref.