Night in a hotel alone - AIBU?

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After several years of pregnancy, breastfeeding, sleepless nights with three children, I have a big birthday coming up, and decided to treat myself to a night in a posh hotel alone to relax. I actually posted in Chat asking for recommendations yesterday. But some friends and relatives have reacted strangely. Why would I not want to spend time with my family? Why would I not want to take my family? Why am I doing this instead of a weekend away with my family? Does my husband mind? What about the children?

For the record, I spend lots of time with my family. It's not an either/or situation - this doesn't impact upon family holiday plans, either time-wise or financially. My husband doesn't mind at all, same as I didn't mind on the occasions he's had nights away to do things he wants. As for the children, I'm sure they'll be fine with their perfectly capable father. He lets them eat more cake than I do, and watch more TV, so they'll be happy.

I'm not being unreasonable to do this am I?

I cant understand their reasoning...if you were off on a Spa weekend no one would bat an eyelid

I go on holiday by myself for a week every year (I have no kids but am married). My mum just can't understand it.

But DH has his own business and can't take time off easily, I get shed loads of annual leave so I am hardly going to waste it!

I love going away alone, no one else to please and no compromises to make, enjoy it.

DH and I do this a few times each year to give each other a break. Nothing fancy. Sometimes meet a friend, sometimes visit somewhere interesting but not child friendly and when the DC were little then I did exactly what you are describing, just for peace and a sleep in a premier inn!

Can you not get someone to baby sit and take your DH too? I’m going to stay in a hotel for my 40th later this year but we’re going out for a meal together first.

I think this defeats the purpose of it being a rest. I am so much more relaxed leaving DC with DH than anyone else as I don't have to worry about checking how they are getting on like I do with the grandparents.

Enjoy!

I genuinely snorted at the poster suggesting you take your DH with you.

I managed this in my parent's country cottage in the lake district last year. Went to stay with them for a week, but they went back to their other house for two nights. Tramp on the hills, perfect steak dinner, lots of lovely time writing. It was bliss.

But some people can't contemplate being alone. I spend 2 days a week alone in my office that I share with a part timer, and there's a constant stream of people 'checking up on me'. I tell them frankly that I enjoy the solitude!

Definitely do it and make it as lush as you want. One of my friends did this and went to The Grosvenor in chester (obviously too far for you!) for a night to herself and some well deserved room service, wine and sleep.

OP, go to CitizenM in SouthBank. It has a lovely snuggly bed, nice shower, cosy cafe and common areas with an international vibe.

And it’s inside your budget.

No question OP, go for it!

In contrast , my birthday wishes are minimal and IMO easily satisfied. I have no kids now, only OH, and all I want is to be left alone with absolutely no duties. Stay in bed and have a leisurely shower and pamper. Mooch about in pj's ,tv during the day and/or read my book. No making endless cups of tea and coffee, or lunch, or dinner. I want to graze all day. And most importantly I don't want anything done for me either.

OH finds this incredibly difficult and feels almost insulted that I don't want to be "taken out" for lunch or dinner, I don't want him to cook for me and I definitely don't want flowers/chocolates/champagne because - I'm so weird - I don't like any of those things.

BTW, I don't resent doing all the meals/snacks/drinks normally because he works hard to maintain our lifestyle, but I resent like hell that he thinks he knows better than me what I want.

I'm already planning to do this in the next couple of months. My friend offered to come with me but to be honest I just want to be alone and able to do whatever I like without having to worry about what other people need/want!

god that would be my idea of heaven - I am hoping my work may want me to go to Germany for 48 hours soon - the thought of all that alone time is sooo good

I'm going to stay near Southbank - looking at the Park Plaza Westminster so I take a long wander and have lots of choices of places to eat. I live in zone 6 and I love London but rarely get to enjoy it by myself. Might even do a walking tour!

I did this last year. Booked a posh hotel very cheap through those secret hotel bookings on lastminute.com. Had 3 under 3 at the time. I was just so exhausted I needed a night alone. I loaded up a bunch of funny movies and tv shows on the laptop, took loads of junk food and wine, ordered room service. Checked in at 2pm on the dot and checked out the next day bang on 12pm and not a minute earlier! Spent most of the time in my room but did go down to swim and sauna/steam room for a bit to relax. It was so nice just being able to think without screaming and crying and hubbys sky sports blasting at full volume!!! We all need time to unwind and gather our thoughts

I fancy staying at Buxted Park www.handpickedhotels.co.uk/buxtedpark