To ask people to stop commenting on what's in my shopping basket

[Octave777]

I get the odd comment here and there which doesn't bother me but the last week it's every time I'm shopping.

I've been binging over easter and I get 'wow are those easter eggs all for you' or 'gosh you like your chocolate' from strangers in the queue.

Today I had a man say 'was I stockpiling easter eggs.' I just laughed. Then he said 'I'd love to buy all those. But I don't want to get fat. You don't have to worry though but just be careful'.

Then the cashier says 'Are they all for you?' 'I say I'm just making the most of the discount and he says, 'I've never seen anyone buy so many for themselves... wow.. haha... where do you put it... wow.' He kept laughing.

Would it be unreasonable to tell the next cashier to say something 'I am gonna puke it all up'. I feel cashiers need to get awareness of bulimia?

I know I'm being sensitive but find easter really hard and would love to be brutally honest. Might stop them doing it to someone else. Or is that too much!!

@RitaMills, it’s exactly the same for me. I’ve been bulimic for 15 years and have never had comments made to me. As you said, it does cross your mind that people may know what you’re doing but when you think about logically, they probably haven’t given a second thought to what you’ve bought. It’s our own thought processes being projected onto other people.

Reminds me of the late great Caroline Aherne in The Fast Show

Years ago I was buying new pillows. The cashier kept going on about how poor quality they were and I really should get better ones as they'd last longer. I was buying the best I could afford and it was bloody embarrassing!

I once had a woman stop me in Tesco, look in my trolley and tell me how great her slimming world group was. I had been dieting by myself and had lost weight but that day I bought a big bar of chocolate at the checkout.

Although the people at checkouts mean no harm, and as has been said, are TOLD to be chatty (by some managers,) it is still quite annoying when they comment on what you buy. But I KNOW they don't mean anything, so I don't say anything, or get 'offended' but it does irk me a bit sometimes.

It doesn't happen every time I visit a cashier though - maybe every one in ten times.

One cashier one time actually got the magazine I was buying, and said 'oooh, I haven't heard of THIS one.....' (it was Psychologies,) and started opening it up and browsing through it. Cheeky mare!

Also, a friend of mine had her (grey haired husband,) with her one time when he was buying his 'just for men' and the cashier said 'VERY LOUDLY 'is this for you is it, dying yer hair are yer? hahahahahaha.'

Not sure what was so funny, as no-one comments when WOMEN buy hair dye, but everyone looked round at stared at him; partly shocked, and partly embarrassed for him. He was so incensed that he didn't go into the store again for about 6 months, and his wife (my friend) wrote a very strongly worded letter of complaint to the Manager.

They got £25 of vouchers from the store and an apology. And although the woman was still there for a good few months, she was gone about 8 months later.

Making 'small talk' is one thing, taking the piss out of someone is something else!!!

caribari

I do think people take offence too easily these days but the pointing man you described is outrageous! Simply not his place to make any kind of comment, even if he thought it! Unbelievable!

Self scanning is the way to go!

It is not condescending to talk about bulimia or to place this in the context of bulimia. What someone with bulimia says and what is really going on can be quite separate things.

Bulimia carries with it a lot of passengers - shame, guilt, fear, need to control, and preoccupation with what others are thinking. This can evolve into a belief that one can tell what others are thinking or that they are actually saying these things. Many try to hide their condition, and to this end can try to canvas opinions on how they might be seen as a pp remarked, if they were to be seen buying a trolleyfull of chocolate, or boxes of laxatives week in and week out.

I agree with Gide that this is a cry for help.

Please seek proper help, OP.
Life can get better. You can feel more free.

The people here who are advising self checkout, etc - maybe you don't see bulimia as a serious problem because people are actually eating (albeit purging afterwards) and not getting rail thin and dying as in anorexia?

It is a terrible self-limiting illness that causes immense misery as well as cumulative physical health issues (throat and intestinal problems and many others as people age), and suggesting ways to keep on at it is irresponsible.

Throat cancer from overexposure to vomit, falls from faintness caused by electrolyte loss, irregular heartbeat, damage to the intestinal tract from laxative overuse, and the mental health toll are side effects. Flippancy is out of place here.

@MOOPied I'm sorry but that is HILARIOUS

One time in the check out line an entitled white male started questioning the back of my head about the provenance of the cardigan I was wearing. I am old so I ignored him.

Go and shop in Ireland, while you’re waiting in the post office queue, there’ll be jokes, chats, advice! I LOVE it!

We all shop near where we live for the most part and customs are different in different places, Deckchair.

I have never had anyone comment on my shopping. I do have a habit of peaking in shopping basket while in a queue, but would never comment.

Get some help OP think of your insides.

People here are generally pretty friendly, but I've never had anyone comment negatively in what I purchase. I was a cashier in high school and college at a grocery store, and we were encouraged to make small talk, but it's was generally restricted to things like the weather, or "I love your necklace," something like that.

A cashier did ask me last week if I had plans for the weekend. I told him I planned to convert oxygen to carbon dioxide. He thought that was funny.