To be pissed off with my cat

[MozzchopsThirty]

I'm ok when she kills little shrews or small birds, that's what cats do!

Today I got home to what can only be described as a murder scene!!!!!
She had dragged a magpie through the utility room window, it was as big as her!
There was blood everywhere and I mean everywhere, all over the white goods, pools of it on the floor, all up the door, the walls, it was hideous
The bird was twitching on the floor, I got it outside and had to phone the RSPCA as it was suffering but I couldn't kill it!
Ds2 traumatised and wants to bury it tomorrow

It took me 2 hours to clean up, I've locked the cat out and I'm so pissed off!

I'm starting to think that our cats are imposters. Lazy fuckers just sit there Snow White-style while the birds, squirrels and mice frolic around them.

Our lowest point was when they decided to bring frogs in, sounds ok but they scream like children when furry bastards are patting them so they'll jump!

Oh and a mouse head was not a good find. Spent ages looking for the other half!

Intelligent You don't have a cat yet. It's entirely possible you will soon. You don't own a cat, they own you (several times a day in my case).

Kitten caught a wasp today 😂

She doesn’t normally have a chin

My tiny female cat killed a robin.
She used to stand on the fence watching and waiting for all the birds.

at VeganCatLover. A guinea pig and a battered sausage! Did it survive? The guinea pig I mean!

Much as it distresses me and pisses me off,I have to admire the sheer tenacity of my cat. She's a tiny little thing but she managed to kill and carry indoors a rat that must have weighed nearly as much as she does.

IllBeAtTheBarIfYouNeedMe She's gorgeous! Even with a chin! It reminds me of the time one of my late DM's cats tried to catch a bee. She ended up with a paw 3 times it's normal size.

I cannot remember where I read/heard this so it could be complete crap but it did seem to slow our Burmese murderer down......
If cat brings a gift (like a baby bird) and you are clearly displeased with them, cat logic is that you didn’t like the gift because it wasn’t big/good enough so next time you get something bigger like a pigeon and they keep bringing you presents until they find one you like.
I once followed our big man around the house with a bit of baby bird making a fuss of him and showing him how delighted I was with the lovely carcass he’d brought me. Seemed to work. Gifts became rarer. Maybe he just thought I was too weird....

We have two ferals that took up residence in our hay during the snow and haven't left . They had been abandoned by our neighbours who fucked off to Spain in December and just left them , and were being fed by three families until they realised they got served Felix twice daily and their personal furry cat house amongst the hay . The tabby is a fantastic hunter and has really earned her keep , catching mice and we haven't seen a ratc since she moved in. The other black one is clueless however and just prances alongside the tabby like a furry cheerleader

Aww I love cats but this is exactly why I don't have them. I've always grown up with them but I just can't cope with the dead stuff they bring in. My mum has 4 and her life is literally cleaning up death most days.

Mine brought me a whole cooked chicken, fuck knows how he dragged it over a six foot fence and an unopened packet of bacon, sadly a little shredded.

My big ginger thing left esoteric circles of mouse innards. Every fucking morning. I think they were offerings to his god me

Someone wrote that if cats looked like frogs, we’d realise what murdering bastards they were, whereas we do tend to boast and forgive them. Pratchett, maybe? As a pp said, if it were dogs, we’d be horrified and stop them going out.

The other black one is clueless however and just prances alongside the tabby like a furry cheerleader

Hilarious!

Showed this thread to my DH. He didn't want to read as he felt so sorry for the birds. He doesn't feel sorry for the chickens that he eats though

"Mine brought me a whole cooked chicken, fuck knows how he dragged it over a six foot fence confused and an unopened packet of bacon, sadly a little shredded. "

I once met a woman on a train and got talking. Turns out we were going to the same station. Talked a bit more, we lived in the same street! Talked a bit more, mentioned my cats, and it turns out my black and white had been going in her cat flap (oo-er) for months stealing their food and scaring their own cat.

She'd offered me a lift home as her husband was picking her up but when we got to the station she just stalked off.

Dvet tells me that mice are "calorie neutral", whilst trousering the extortionate de-worming fee. Yes, I know I can do it, but the teeth on the killing machine are terrifying.

In the old days, when we had a cat flap that operated using collar magnets we woke to a rumpus several nights a week as the stupid furry twats attempted to enter with discarded forks, spoons and other various metallic items attached to their stupid bloody necks.

We have two cats, perhaps would-be murderers but probably not as they're both the sweetest things on earth. They've always been kept indoors because of DH's old cats being lost to traffic accidents in the past. My girl cat plays with hairbands and brings them to me and she chirrups to the birds outside. The boy cat plays hide and seek under a blanket and likes to 'kill' Mister Mouse (cuddly toy) on a daily basis. We have shown them outside before but girl cat thinks it's too cold and blustery and boy cat is afraid of his own shadow.

My cat is beautiful but not very clever. He once hunted a marshmallow and proudly brought it to me.
Tonight he successfully hunted some chicken from his own bowl. He kept pouncing on it till he caught it. Superb hunting skills there, Cat.

They may look the sweetest little fur balls on earth, but inside every pussy cat a tiger roars. At least that describes my blue eyed Bengal!

We had an outside cat that used to catch baby bunnies every spring & chew their ears off. It happened at least twice on the patio right in front of the kids. Poor baby bunnies were squealing and running round, Cat would nonchalantly wander off. Kids were inconsolable...

I used to watch in horror as the neighbour's cat used to bring back huge rats from the nearby brook to present to her. Some days I'd
see him three or four times bringing a fresh haul back. They all appeared to be dead thankfully. He was an evil cat though and ruled the whole cul de sac and terrified all the dogs.

Loving this thread!
One of our cats regularly brings in mice and birds, hate it but I’m used to it. Our previous cat used to bring in leaves, chocolate bar wrappers and stones. She went through a phase of bringing in coy carp and we had to put them in a bucket and take them to someone we knew with a pond. She did this about five times and then one day at the post office a woman was talking to someone about how their expensive carp kept being stolen and they were sure there was a heron about. So they were covering the pond with mesh. It must have worked as she stopped.
She also brought us a battered fish and a whole joint of beef one Sunday which was still nice and hot. I pictured the family sitting down for lunch and just seeing veg and gravy.
Another cat used to bring live frogs with just the legs dangling from her mouth. Oh and once she came in and opened her mouth and the largest bee I have ever seen flew out.
Gotta love cats.

This is when I am grateful mine is an indoor cat. Mind you the dog has managed to kill three voles/shrews while walking on a short leash! If he went off leash god knows what he would kill.
I remember our cats growing up dragging in rabbits bigger than them.

These stories of cats bringing in snakes is making me twitch.

We had a very skilled mouser when I was a teen. Lined up her presents on the porch roof outside varrious bedroom windows when we refused to let her in with them. Her brother learnt to open the fridge and hunted the food in there day and night and left gifts from his adventures in beds and doorways. The yoghurt and cheese hunter was much more annoying.

Our former frogger, now moved from the house with a pond much to her displeasure, now hunts slugs and flying insects.

My beautiful girl was a killing machine, attempeted to take down a phesent and had to be caught and shut in when a badger ventured into the garden... But never brought us gifts. She also hunted feet from the bottom of the bed and eye lashes when you weren't up early enough to serve breakfast.