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Original poster

To ask over 40s how they feel about their hair?

89 replies

AjasLipstick · 04/04/2018 14:14

I'm 45 and this year my long hair just looks awful. It's the texture of a horses tail thanks to me dying the greys at home. It's very, very thick and dry anyway...so now I must be 80% grey, it's worse.

I'm going to have to get the chop. I'm really nervous because though I am attractive, my jawline isn't what it was...last bob I had about 5 years ago drew attention to my jawline being less than sharp!

I am thinking of something a bit funky though....I'm not a particularly conservative dresser...more likely to be seen in big boots and slightly vintage clothing than anything expensive and posh.

What style?? I want some length on top! NOT a bob though.

OP posts:
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SluttyButty · 04/04/2018 21:17

I'm 50 and recently had my past shoulder length hair cut to just below my chin. God it aged me and am now growing it back to my shoulders.

Wafflenose · 04/04/2018 21:19

I'm 40 and have thick, slightly wavy auburn hair with a few dozen greys. You can only really see them close up. It's slightly layered, so just past my bra line at the back and a bit shorter at the front. It's in good condition for its length and my age, but it doesn't really grow past this length now without looking straggly and feeling horrible at the ends. I like it most of the time.

Four years ago, my DD (then 8) wanted to chop off her waist length hair. I was sad about it, but someone suggested that she could donate it. It meant cutting off more than she had planned, but she was keen. I told her that if she was brave enough and generous enough to do that, I'd do it too. We did a sponsored haircut, raised £350 and donated our hair. She kept hers shortish for a few years and is growing it long now. I grew mine straight back, but the chop did wonders for its condition.

I haven't really dyed it over the years, but due to its length and some natural lightening during the summer, it looks a bit two-tone in the winter. So in January, for the first time ever, I had lots of highlights put in, in my natural colour IYSWIM. Nobody noticed, DH included!! But I did... I look like Summer Me.

Borridge · 04/04/2018 21:19

I consider my grey hair to be natural highlights. Possibly I am the only one Grin.

I am 48 and my hair seems to be getting drier by the day.

wfrances · 04/04/2018 21:20

44 and had same hair (give /take a few inches) forever
at the moment its just past shoulder .
alternate roots ,full dye and trimmed every other 5 weeks by hairdresser as i have a tiny greying patch to front side and my hair is very dark.
its very thick , with a slight wave .its so thick i think it need some weight /length.
why dont you get some home treatment oils and have it professionally dyed before going for chop , i find it smooths the cuticles and find it lovely and shiny after.

Borridge · 04/04/2018 21:22

Have you considered a pixie? I think it looks very cool on many women.

Airbiscuits · 04/04/2018 21:22

45 here. A fair smattering of greys that I have to get covered at the hairdressers (tint and highlights) I’ve always had fine hair and haven’t changed the style or colour in years, boringly. But it works for me most days.

To ask over 40s how they feel about their hair?
steff13 · 04/04/2018 21:30

I'm 41. This is my hair. It's wavy. That's it's natural color. I like it. It was really straight before I had #2 son, and it's taken me awhile to make peace with wavy hair.

To ask over 40s how they feel about their hair?
wfrances · 04/04/2018 21:31

what colour is your hair ?, its easier to go grey if your lighter
too much contrast for me ,as im so dark.

Seeingadistance · 04/04/2018 21:40

I'm in my early 50s and stopped dying my hair about 4 years ago. I love my grey hair - it's in better condition than it was when I dyed it, and I feel much confident and happier with it undyed. Cut-wise, I've gone from a short bob to an undercut, so clipped to a number 2 or 3 at the back and sides, and currently about jaw length on top, falling down one side.

ItLooksABitOff · 04/04/2018 21:45

I stopped dyeing my hair about 18 months ago, and also started the curly girl method (I have wavy hair). My hair has never been so healthy, shiny, wavy etc. I have a fair smattering of greys and because they are drier/coarser the CG method has worked really well for keeping them moisturized and soft.

I'm so glad I ditched the dye. IMO my hair looks better and not that dry, frazzled look you see on so many of us over 40.

ItLooksABitOff · 04/04/2018 21:46

I have very dark brown hair if that helps.

wfrances · 04/04/2018 22:06

i guess it depends were your grey is
dh has a lovely all over covering but mine is only in 1 tiny patch ,on my very dark hair it looks white.

Mabelface · 04/04/2018 22:15

I'm 48 and have waist length curly hair which I've been home dyeing for donkey's years. I co wash it and it's in fantastic condition. There's some grey underneath the dye, but not much. It's bright red and I get lots of compliments on it. I rarely use heat on it.

TooManyPaws · 04/04/2018 22:16

I've got below-waist-length hair and the grey isn't coming fast enough for me! I want more white so I can have fun with multicoloured semi-permanents without having to bleach it first 😆

Echobelly · 04/04/2018 22:38

I actually properly grew my hair for the first time in my adult life after I turned 35 and now at 40 have had proper long hair, having kept it in a crop most of the time since age 9. My MIL suggested I grow it while I was looking for a job post redundancy as she suggested I'd look 'more approachable' with longer hair, which I was slightly offended by initially but I do think I had passed a point where my short hair went from neat and cute to looking a tad severe.

It's dark blonde, with no detectable grey and still seems to be in fairly good condition, though after a lifetime of short hair, I can't really do much with it other than tie it back messily (I simply don't understand how anyone can plait their own hair without 4 hands and vision in the back of their head!). I think long is still most flattering for now, but I'd happily go for the chop again if I think the time is right, and I think it will be again some time.

DailyWailSucksSnails · 04/04/2018 22:45

I am 50 & have buckets of (increasingly grey) hair.
Not kidding -- hairdressers take ages to cut my hair b/c there's so much of it.
I got a boy cut for this summer. Number 3 around the sides & longer on top. With extra thinning for layer up top b/c very thick hair. This is brill. A lot like these (not blue, though).

To ask over 40s how they feel about their hair?
To ask over 40s how they feel about their hair?
PositiveProton · 04/04/2018 22:56

I love the @Grombre page on instagram. The ladies of all ages with their beautiful silver hair look beautiful.
www.instagram.com/p/Bg8tYAflBkA/

PositiveProton · 04/04/2018 22:58

Meant to say that perhaps it will give you hair cut ideas for coarse hair? I know you may not want tomorrow out your greys yet, but its definitely nice to see how some have.

Lonesurvivor · 04/04/2018 23:09

I've loads and loads of grey but get it done every four weeks to a nice brunette. I'm in my mid 40s and love my below shoulder length hair. It's wavy, has a great shine and is not too heavy.
I find getting it coloured and trimmed regularly along with using products that suit and my steam pod or babyliss big hair means it usually looks fab.

I used to do home colours inbetween hair dressers appointments but it ruined the texture and condition not to mention colour of my hair.
I'd advise you op to get a good trim and ditch the home colours.

Ski40 · 04/04/2018 23:13

Was born quite blonde, then went dark over the years, dyed red(henna) in my teens, then started to highlight and build on it until I ended blonde again at 23. I'm 43 now so have been bleaching my hair for 20 years- and it shows. It's quite dry and needs lots of conditioner and masks to keep it glossy. 😕
It thins when I get stressed or don't eat that well. And I struggle to grow it past my shoulders.
I'm toying with the idea of going back to red for my 45th birthday. It looked nice on me and was a lot kinder to my hair.

ohtheholidays · 04/04/2018 23:31

43 next month and I love my hair.

Just been to the hairdressers today actually,had my fringe cut back in,my ends trimmed and my layers thinned out(I have lots of hair and it is very think and naturally wavy)mines quite long about 4 inches past my shoulders.

I've got some grey hair now,just the roots just above my fringe and I colour mine at home.I think I've been very lucky so far with my hair as I've got older,I hated it till I was about 25.

Daifuku9 · 05/04/2018 00:13

Have you a chance to get Olaplex treatments when you get your haircut? It’s good for chemically damaged hair (and natural but aging and frizzy) I would check out that and also, the third step you can buy for use at home. I can’t price it everywhere, where I am (US) it was $40 for the salon treatment, and $28 for the at home treatment/third step. It really makes it softer and less dry-frizzy.

scaryteacher · 05/04/2018 00:24

Which strange country....some people might be able to give recommends. I can for just outside Brussels.

Dixiestampsagain · 05/04/2018 00:54

I’m very lucky to be a few years over 40 and to only have one or two grey/white hairs. I’ve recently had my long, very shapeless hair cut to shoulder length with a few layers, which looks better. As I’m getting older, my hair is going really curly, which is odd!

DustyMaiden · 05/04/2018 01:53

My hair is very straight and fine, a few grey I’m 56. I had a perm last week and bonding, I’m quite pleased with it.

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