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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to wonder why the whole family go supermarket shopping?

506 replies

turnipfarmers · 01/04/2018 17:00

I tend to shop without my children as it's easier; I get that lone parents have to take their children with them but what I can't make sense of is why you see two adults with several children in tow at the supermarket?

Shopping with children for the weekly shop doesn't seem to be much of a pleasurable experience to me and it's probably not that fun for the children so why do people do it?

OP posts:
NutElla5x · 01/04/2018 17:57

That's how it was for other half and me when kids were small too PonderLand He was the driver but I did most of the cooking & was a more savvy shopper,plus we were lucky that on the whole the kids behaved well and so we used to quite enjoy that bit of time together.

Getoffthetableplease · 01/04/2018 17:58

Because Sunday is the only time we can go (yes, I could order online but I hate not choosing my own meat and veg etc and I can't order food from Aldi/Lidl), but it also happens to be the only day we have together so we all go on the way to/from somewhere. Is that okay with you? Crikey - issues if this is the kind of shiz to waste time judging families for Hmm

longestlurkerever · 01/04/2018 17:59

Threads like this make me realise some people see the world totally differently to me! What is this more important stuff people stay home to do rather than taking a stroll with their family? I'm not even one of those people who spends all my time gushing about family time - they quite often drive me mad - but rarely on the stroll home from school. It's nice!

MinaPaws · 01/04/2018 18:00

Reasons we've shopped as a family:
We're on holiday in the area and hanging out together
School have asked us to take primary school DC to supermarket as a learning experience to weigh veg and add up prices etc
Cecause we're shopping on our way back from somewhere or on our way to somewhere as a family
Because DH wants to do the main food shop and I want to see what TU/George clothes fit DC

NutElla5x · 01/04/2018 18:02

Because if I go alone my husband has to look after the kids. He'd rather we all have a shit time together. LOL Grin

Want2bSupermum · 01/04/2018 18:03

I'm with you OP. DH thinks it's a family activity akin to going to the park or for a walk along the waterfront. His parents were poor so this was the only time he got to leave the house at the weekends. I hate it but at the same time I've had to slowly eliminate it from our weekend schedule otherwise I'd lose my sanity.

Living here in the US the online shopping is awful. I do stealth shops at fresh direct which is like ocado and a monthly trip to Costco for meat. DH still hasn't figured out how we always have fresh fruit and veg in the fridge and fruit bowl!

AnnieAnoniMouser · 01/04/2018 18:05

longestlurkerever. I guess because I see it as a chore, so if someone else wants to do it, then great - but in that case I don’t need to do it as well. Unless there’s a nice cup of coffee in the deal, then maybe

Steeley113 · 01/04/2018 18:06

Seriously? You can’t imagine any situation where an entire family would be in a supermarket? We often do the big shop as part of an entire day of doing things, as with a lot of chores that would be easier if just one of us went. So hair cuts, library, visit grandma and call Sainsbury’s on the way home was yesterday for one example. It’s not difficult to shop with kids Hmm

MillieMoodle · 01/04/2018 18:07

We used to go together when we only had DS1. We both worked full time and I did almost everything around the house while DH mostly lay on the sofa watching sky sports. I sure as hell wasn't going to do the weekly shopping with DS1 without DH's help as well. He wouldn't have had DS1 at home with him while I went shopping alone.

When we had DS2 I put my foot down and said it had to be online shopping, so that's what we do now. I still sort our meal plan, the list and order it, but it's delivered when I'm at work so he takes it in and puts it all away now. He's a SAHD now and oh how life has changed Grin

Mynewnameforabit · 01/04/2018 18:10

My DSs nursery used to take the DCs who's parents never took them shopping out to the local supermarket, because they had found that some of them genuinely didn't know what it was.
Its part of life, they need to learn how to find things on a list, check prices are within a budget, pay etc. Also that life isn't all play, and you have to do some stuff that you might not fancy so you'll have food later.

Spudlet · 01/04/2018 18:11

Ds is 2,and he does enjoy a supermarket shoppng trip. Riding in the trolley! Holding the list! Discussing (well, me monologuing as he is a late talker) about what to get! Waving and smiling at the checkout operators! It's like a lovely day out for him.

He doesn't get to charge about though we save that for the garden centre when he makes a break for it.

MoodyTwo · 01/04/2018 18:12

I hardly have any time with my DS so if I didn't do it online I would go to store x

Sparklingbrook · 01/04/2018 18:13

As soon as they are old enough you can send the DC into the supermarket with a list and have a bit of a snooze in the car while you wait for them.

longestlurkerever · 01/04/2018 18:14

longestlurkerever. I guess because I see it as a chore, so if someone else wants to do it, then great - but in that case I don’t need to do it as well. Unless there’s a nice cup of coffee in the deal, then maybe. I don't mind it particularly, but wouldn't generally set off straight from home to do the supermarket shop - it'd be more calling in at the supermarket on my way back from somewhere. In which case the family would be with me, more often than not. If I was popping out to the shops it'd normally be on foot, and I might drag the kids with me for the exercise and change of scene. They're much easier to entertain out of the house than in, even if it's just on a walk to the supermarket.

Goldmandra · 01/04/2018 18:14

Why is your kids screeching and running around like dickheads whilst you shout at them enjoyable family time?

Some children don't do that. In fact I think the majority are perfectly capable of behaving appropriately in supermarkets.

I have always taken my own and childminded children supermarket shopping. Not one has ever run around screeching Confused

Why shouldn't they help with making decisions about the family meals, unpacking the trolley, packing the bags, etc?

RebelRogue · 01/04/2018 18:14

We mostly online shop. Sometimes OH will pick things up or go for a full shop with DD. Sometimes i also like to go to have a look around and pick some nice things for myself.

We also all go when I go clothes shopping, because 1. I don't drive and 2. It's at least a half a day outing. I buy my stuff in peace while DD and OH trawl the kids aisle,then we go and have cinnamon pretzels,then the Lego shop where DD plays,then toys shop,then Wilko which we all love,OH for the sweets,DD for the toys and arts and crafts,me for the stations and home stuff. If the weAther is nice DD has a go on the rides that are there nearly year round,then we have lunch. We finally crawl through. The door at about 3-4 pm . It's been a good and fun day.

GnotherGnu · 01/04/2018 18:15

But it's not taking a stroll with the family, is it, longest? It's all the hassle of getting to the supermarket, finding a parking space, making the kids wait while you sort out shopping bags etc, going round looking for things you need whilst the kids pester you for stuff you don't need, stopping them getting in the way of other shoppers, queuing up with bored kids, paying and packing, schlepping out to the car and putting the bags in, returning the trolley. Anything further from a relaxing leisurely stroll would be hard to imagine.

NewYearNewMe18 · 01/04/2018 18:16

My local shopping centre has what I can only assume to be husband parks - you plonk him there, and surround him with shopping bags until he's walled in.

But Ladies, seriously, if it is you that is accompanied by your bloke - per-lease do not discard him at the end of the bra rack, slyly perving looking at his phone, just getting in the way

I do seriously think there should be dedicated shopping times for unaccompanied people.

GnotherGnu · 01/04/2018 18:16

My children didn't run around screeching, but that didn't ever change the fact that it was just easier to shop without them than with them.

Idontevencareanymore · 01/04/2018 18:16

For me its because I don't drive (physically can't due to injury) so I need taking and picking up. If I sent dh I'd end up with shopping for today and possibly tomorrow because the ability to think we may need a store cupboard for the weeks meals is beyond him.

Also why not? The attitude of kids getting under the feet? People blocking the aisles with trolleys and being ignorant in general is worse than than kid being a kid. At least they have an excuse....

Fwiw I usually send the dh to the park with kids so I can meander at leisure.

MrTumblesSpottyHag · 01/04/2018 18:17

We do most things as a family. The kids are pretty well behaved and enjoy choosing things and putting them in the trolley and we all get a say in what we buy. I do prefer online shopping but sometimes we're not organised enough!
Certainly not an issue of control in my relationship, we just all enjoy each other's company.

Itmakesthereaderreadon · 01/04/2018 18:17

We do the big shop online. Ds would rather eat his own eyeballs than enter a supermarket, but Dd quite enjoys a mooch with me when we do top ups.

We used to wait in the car when I was a kid.

LiteraryDevil · 01/04/2018 18:18

My exH does this but then his new gf doesn't allow him to do anything by herself and I think their Aldi is out of range of the tracking device she has on him.

Lotsofplanetshaveanorth · 01/04/2018 18:19

On our case because they need to learn the skills so that they are not total muppets when they leave home ( counting down 10 years to go)

Takeaweeseat · 01/04/2018 18:19

Why, though? I mean how can it be a rewarding experience? I can't imagine many families going home and saying "I'll never forget the day we went to Aldi to choose the parsnips for dinner"

GrinGrinGrin I agree, I can't think of anything worse than taking all the children out shopping...and they're good well behaved kids but they are just bored shitless, what's the point?

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