I've been friends with this person (C) since we were young teens and we're both in our thirties.
He's not a very sociable person. Doesn't go out/do much outside of work. We meet up once a year but speak at least once a week via text or call and have done for many years since I moved away. I've since moved back to live nearer to him.
Anyway yesterday I had a different friend visiting and we planned to go out for a pub dinner, have a couple of drinks/game of pool OR just stay in and play games and I'd cook, basically planned a bit of an evening.
My partner (whom I live with) usually works Friday nights so we decided to do something. I told C about it and invited him, my exact words were 'do you fancy hanging out with us tonight not sure what we're doing though?' and he said yes to which I was surprised as he doesn't usually want to go out and do things but I was pleased.
I picked him up, and me and my other friends were just sort of deciding what our plan for the evening was.
Anyway, he did advise me he'd been drinking , and I know he likes a drink, wasn't too bothered about that. It was more that when he'd been at our house half an hour or so he did the following;
-said 'Are we going out I'm bored' to which I said yes we'll go out if you like, what does everyone else want to do and then we decided to go out and I went to get ready, he then said 'cant go out I've not got any money'. I offered to lend him some but said if you'd rather stay in that's fine? He said if we went out he'd go home. Then changed his mind again said he'd borrow some £ and we'd go out.
-when we got to the pub, he said it was boring can we go somewhere else. I said yes, but we've ordered food so not yet. We ate and got a taxi somewhere else had a few games of pool
-kept saying people were looking at him and it was because he stands out and saying loudly to them to 'eff' off (he's a nondescript looking person and I am sure they weren't)!
-Played pool with my partner and repeatedly said how men were better and was quite aggressive about it, hard to explain just making subtle jibes and saying 'yeh I'll effing beat you' sort of thing.
- we then went somewhere else and again kept saying he was bored-he said he was bored in each place several times! We were all just chilled, having a couple of drinks, admittedly not a wild night of partying but I didn't say we would, I just invited him to come and join us for the eve.
His demeanour was just aggressive all night. He then had a go at my partner and said he could 'Take Sherry off you anytime you know that' (VERY untrue btw) and she was getting quite annoyed at this point and said she had totally changed her opinion of C who she had previously quite liked. He was aggressive with the taxi driver on the way home, and when we got back we played a card game and he repeatedly said how competitive he was and how he'd definitely win...he was just very unpleasant. He stayed over last night, and both yesterday and today he's told me my laptop is 'shit' and I need to get a new one, our TV is shit,my 'phone is 'shit' too and I am such a calm, rational person but I was thinking these things our adequate for our needs, I'm not much into TV or technology and have no desire to have top of the range stuff.
I value friendship a lot, and my other friend is fine and wasn't bothered by him, my partner is a little miffed but okay no real harm done. I guess I am just disappointed, with what should have been a nice evening.
However, C is naturally very shy and I am wondering if 'dutch courage' got the better of him. We all had a few drinks last night but none of us were anything more than somewhere between sober and tipsy. I am not sure whether to forgive and move on or say something to C.