To think at least one of my friends could have rung me?

[Ihaveareallyoldpairofknickers]

My friends know that I go quiet when I’m unhappy and not one of them has contacted me to check I’m ok. It’s been almost 2 months and wouldn’t have heard from them at all if it hadn’t been for my birthday. I have history of multiple suicide attempts and they know I’m feeling like this at the moment. I’ve posted some poems on FB about how I’m feeling at the moment and not had one response. So I’m feeling totally shit. I’m meant to be meeting some of them next week and I’m not sure if I can face them. I was meant to meet one of them for my birthday but because I wasn’t feeling very good he suggested another time and haven’t heard anything since.

I’m sorry you’ve had quite a lot of unhelpful posts on this thread, OP. Many of which make huge assumptions and so are irrelevant.
I hope you can have a better day.

I also woke up thinking of you. I think the people posting about the fb posts should stop now the op gets it you guys there is no need to keep posting it over & over.
Is it nice weather where you are today op? It’s nice here today I’m going to get up soon & get some fresh air xx
What are your plans for the day? If you do not have any let’s make one here together to help you through the long weekend.
Get a pen & paper and write down everything you like to do all the things you enjoy. Then look through & see what could be done today.
E.g go buy yourself a nice dress shoes etc. make a nice dinner do yoga etc whatever it is you enjoy.
Then do one thing on the list.
I truly feel for you. You have been through some hard times in your life.
I hope you will be ok today.
I was very low at one point. I also felt my friends didn’t care. In my case it was true but I no longer have these people in my life.
Also the fact that you come on here for support & people are not showing much support. You are not doing anything wrong by wanting your friends supporting you. It’s a natural human need to want to feel loved and cared for. Also the professional support isn’t always the most accessible especially on a bank holiday.
I’m here for you today. If you need support I care. I have been there. I was depressed for years but now while I still have the nasty people in my life I look at it different now I don’t take it personally the problem lies with them.

In the kindest way possible your mental health isn't their problem. Why should they make the first contact? You don't know what's going on with them since you haven't contacted them either.

I have a friend with severe mh issues and I have had to make my peace with this issue exactly. I used to really give myself a hard time if I hadn't contacted her for some reason but then I realised that I had consistently been there for her for 15 years whilst single and fancy free through thick and thin. Now I have a family I have to prioritise and I'd like to think my 15 years of investment gives me some emotional currency with her in that she knows she can ask for my help anytime but I just can't be chasing contact with her all the time.

Emmajr1 it takes 2 seconds to send a text I swear the way people go on on this thing the person is suffering they never once said they didn’t think of their friends problems they are feeling down that’s is all

Lovely post Bubba1234

I understand that but mh issues aren't once in a while they are constant and draining for all involved. I love my friend dearly but I only have so much to give and when you are the person constantly checking in it is difficult to maintain momentum. My friend knows I'm here for her whenever she needs me but I just don't have the time or emotional energy to deal with someone else's ongoing issues all of the time. I'm very sympathetic towards op and anyone with similar problems but the initial post did sound like she though

Sorry my son pressed post!

Thought that her friends had abandoned her but infact had reached out to her a few times. Not liking a poem on fb is not ignoring her neither should she stand them up when they are trying to see her. It's a pa way of punishing them for not realising sing she needs support even though she hasn't asked for it .

Yes I’m ok thank you but felt awful last night after reading some of the assumptions that people have posted on here.

I’m really sorry that this thread had some crap contributions, OP. I’ve just realised it’s in AIBU though, MH would probably be better. People are more aware there not to post anything that could make things feel worse.

alot of people are scared (mum was sectioned october for a month she tried to escape she had a urine infection and was hallucinating)
Get seen by a doc
anti depressants take about 6 weeks to work (dont stop taking them if u feel better )its their job
ull need ure pals for the tough day and omg there is tough days
they need to understand that its not uxx
god willing im not religious in the slightest but theyve been there for my mum (we had xmas tea with them all )

I'm dead against laying the responsibility for the OP's mental well being at the doors of her friends.... these friends have lives and issues of their own I don't doubt.. and it's very unfair to expect them to pick up the slack every time OP goes 'quiet' on social media....

we have Mental Health Teams all over the country.. to accommodate those who desperately need help....

OP is able to verbalise on Mumsnet what she is feeling/suffering.. she could consider posting a link to this Thread.. in a PM to her friends so they may begin understand what she is going through... but not so they can bear the weight of the responsibility for her care and well being or even expect them to do so... but so that should they be able.. can pop in and out via text email social media whatever...

People are not psychic...

I’d honestly ask for this to be moved to Mental Health, OP.

... or to Relationships.

Sorry you are feeling low OP.

However, as others have said, relying on FB poems to show others how you feel is unwise. Many people just ignore/scroll straight past them (I do- find them a bit irritating TBH) and other people do view them as attention seeking (they often are). If you need support, speak to your friends directly. They did contact you for your birthday, so it's not as though you've been ignored.

Sometimes people are busy, time flies and weeks have passed before they know it. They aren't mind readers, so if you would like help then I would suggest asking them. Your post does sound like it's heading towards a bit of a wallow/feeling hard done but I would try not to take personally without good reason, especially if they are usually supportive.

And you never know- perhaps some of your friends have things going on in their own lives at the moment; their own problems and difficulties may mean they haven't been in touch as much recently or means they haven't noticed that you have "gone quiet". Or maybe their problems mean they don't feel able to offer you the support you would like. Or perhaps they don't know what to do for the best anymore.You simply don't know until you ask.