To think this is really rude (& a bit heartless)

[birdsnotbees]

Up until Thurs we had no plans for Easter, save for me seeing my mum and dad at some point. Then DH's sis suggested coming to visit, which is lovely - very happy to see her, though I mentioned to her we'd be seeing my mum and dad at some point too. DH thinks this is not ok, that I should tell my parents we can't see them so that we can spend all our time with SIL.

I now have to either make an excuse or tell them straight up we've had a better offer. DH thinks this isn't rude. I think it's awful.

DH says he hasn't seen SIL for ages so wants to properly catch up. Fair enough, but she's coming for 3 days (I've suggested a lunch with my parents), and he's made zero effort to see her before this weekend. I on the other hand have been trying to arrange a meet up since Oct.

And my parents do so much for us, he's always saying "we should do something for them", but when it actually comes to it, he won't do anything.

AIBU to think telling them they can't come is really rude? Especially as it's me that has to tell them, and thus me that will now be letting them down.

Can't see why they can't still come.

I wouldn't rearrange plans with your parents; I agree it would be rude. Why can't they visit when SIL is with you?

YANBU

Did your DH know that plans had been made for you to visit mum and dad?

Agree with Nanny and Fuzzy.

What? Why can't you still see your parents regardless if SIL visiting? Surely you could all good out together for lunch or leave DH with SIL and you go see your parents.

Why can't you all meet up together?

It would be very rude to ditch your parents.

That is incredibly rude, tell him it is his attitude that isn't ok.

Please don't make excuses to your parents, absolutely still see them, don't let him tell you want can and can't do

Agreed - very rude to ditch your parents.

Why don't you just go and see your parents and leave him to it ?

She's staying for 3 days, what's a few hours with your parents? Plus I'd leave him to sort out any meals anything that needs doing whilst his sister is tyetr

It would be extremely rude to cancel on your parents, if you want to see them it's your choice, not your husbands. Either you all go out together or he goes out with his sister by himself.

*there

Yes it’s very rude. I don’t see why you can’t either all go out for lunch or come and have lunch with you?

Your folks still come. He doesn't get to cancel just because another person is there. This is just him being a dickhead.

Can you see them all together?

Tell him to cancel his sister, you already had plans.

If he objects, tell him to come up with compromise that you’ll agree to then.

If he objects, go away with your ps for Easter.

Do you have children?

He's a rude bugger that fella of yours.

No reason why your parents can't still come or you all go to them. Might be nice for them and sil to have a catch up.

Make sure dh does his fair share of the hosting - him and sil don't get to sit around chatting while you slog in the background, oh no!

I would go to your parents and leave him and SIL to it. Is he always so bossy?

That’s incredibly rude. You and kids should definitely still go to your folks. I’d tell SIL as in her shoes I’d be mortified if someone was so rude on my behalf.

Besides, if it was me or my SILs we enjoy catching up with each other’s parents anyway. Doesn’t happen often and they are nice people.

You're absolutely right OP. No reason why your parents can't come when SIL is there.

Is he usually like this?

YANBU

It is rude, and unnecessary!

I see no reason why you can’t have lunch with your parents and SIL.

Is there a back story, or is your DH just being frankly odd.

He's being ridiculous. Has he had a bang on the head recently?

I can't see any reason in the OP why you can't do both? Doesn't make any sense.