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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to not want DS to go on a nursery trip in a coach with adult seatbelts?

81 replies

snowleopard · 09/05/2007 18:12

He's just under 2 and today I (along with another parent who was nearby) were asked to give consent to a day trip to a family play park thingy a good 30 miles away. The other mum asked how they would get there and it transpired in a big coach with normal adult seatbelts. The trip is for his group(aged 18 month-2 years) and the older groups who are 2, 3 and 4. Is this normal? I thought adult seatbelts were dangerous below a certain height? i said I would consider taking our child seat and fitting it into the coach using the seatbelt - wuld that be a good idea or would I be unreasonable to just not let him go?

The nursery have always been so good and careful, or so I thought - this has really upset me - but maybe IABU? I know city buses don't have seatbelts for example but they trundle slowly around city centres - and anyway if DS goes on one of those he's strapped into his buggy. And this is a big coach going on the bypass and A1...

OP posts:

coppertop · 09/05/2007 18:14

Our pre-school usually asks parents to bring a car seat or booster seat for their children to use.

oops · 09/05/2007 18:15

Message withdrawn

hercules1 · 09/05/2007 18:16

Surely that is illegal?
Not sure what I'd do.

Buses in cities usually go very slowly but it sounds like yours will go some speed.

hercules1 · 09/05/2007 18:16

If he's under 2 I'd get him to miss it as he wont be so aware of what he's missing anyway.

sunnysideup · 09/05/2007 18:18

I just wouldn't have said yes to this - YANBU. He's not even two yet and I just think it's more appropriate for their nursery outings to be round the corner to the park or the post office or something!

Original poster

snowleopard · 09/05/2007 18:26

I haven't given consent - said I'd think about it and talk to DP. I might also ring the nursery manager to ask her about it as I did think it was illegal too.

It's true he won't miss out because he won't realise. I just don't know what's normal - but know I I don't feel right about it.

OP posts:

TheBlonde · 09/05/2007 18:30

I don't think it's illegal but if you're not happy don't let him go

I have just been on a similar trip and the 2-4 year olds wore the adult belts

tubismybub · 09/05/2007 18:31

definately wouldn't let him go with out being in a suitable car seat

oops · 09/05/2007 18:39

Message withdrawn

McDreamy · 09/05/2007 18:42

how on earth are they going to get 18 month old children to sit down on a coach wth out car seats!!

Mum2FunkyDude · 09/05/2007 18:42

No, and I can't quite imagine that he would not be able to crawl out of the seat belt, try to get off his seat, and then how many teachers to look after all of them?

RubyRioja · 09/05/2007 18:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

3littlefrogs · 09/05/2007 18:45

What on earth is the point of taking under 5s on a coach trip?? I can't imagine anything more stressful - for staff, children and parents at home worrying.

LIZS · 09/05/2007 18:48

I still worry about dd (5) on a coach trip so no you are not unreasonable. Wonder why they feel the need to take them all so young anyway. Are parent helpers going or just staff ?

Original poster

snowleopard · 09/05/2007 19:31

It's just staff, though they did say a 1 to 2 ratio. It is a good nursery normally, really good, they take them for walks with 1 staff to every 2 in double buggies which I'm OK with.

I will still talk to them tomorrow but basically I do agree he's too little for this sort of thing, especially as he's clingy at the moment and in an easily scared phase. I know I will need to let go more eventually but your reactions have reassured me. I could pursue the line of fitting our car seat into the coach but I'm just instinctively not all that happy about the whole thing.

OP posts:

Pixiefish · 09/05/2007 19:41

We went on a bus to the zoo on Saturday and the seatbelts were lap belts.

I don't know but I think that the bit that's dangerous is the diagonal shoulder strap as that could garrotte a child in an accident. Also a 2 year old could undo his strap. If oyu were sat next to him he wouldn't be able to undo it would he.

I'd check this out properly but that was how I justified it to mysefl the other day

FrayedKnot · 09/05/2007 19:42

DS' nursery expected a parent to accompany under 3's on their trip last year.

We went on a coach with seatbelts, I used one with DS but I don;t think it would have done much tbh, it was a lap belt.

I can;t see how we could have secured car seats in the coach with the belts they had, though.

I would definitely not have let him go without me (he was 2.4 at the time), both for the journey and for the day as a whole, but then his nursery would not have had enough staff, either, for a 2-1 ratio, hence the need for parents to accompany.

There were staff remaining at the nursery for any children who couldn;t go, and most children were accompanied by a parent, even the older ones.

dinny · 09/05/2007 19:42

God, dd supposed to be going on trip in two weeks and really don't want her too - seems like she is too young. is that unfair on her?

worcestercaroline · 09/05/2007 19:46

correct me if i am wrong but coach belts are lap belts rather than accross the shoulder belts, so car seats would not fit.

contentiouscat · 09/05/2007 19:48

Pixie beat me to it - the coaches I have been on have had belts which just go across the lap. You need a booster in a car as the seat belts there are 3 point belts which would go across their neck if they weren't high enough.

tbh 2 seems awfully young to me for a day trip, he will fall asleep on the way and be grumpy there

Hulababy · 09/05/2007 19:49

DD went on one nursery trip on a coach, only about 5 miles away or so. but everyone had to provide a car seat for their child and demonstrate it to at least one responsible accompanying adult - they had extra staff in to have a 2:1 ratio. They hired a coach with full 3 point seat belts, not lap belts.

I am still not keen on DD, age 5yo, going on school trips on coaches, without seat belts - so no you are not being unreasonable.

Hulababy · 09/05/2007 19:49

Some coaches have 3 point seat belts, not just lap belts.

FrayedKnot · 09/05/2007 20:02

Not that I am suggesting yours or any other nursery would be this irresponsible but I once went to visit a farm park place and there was a nursery group visiting at the same time.

Somehow a little girl (under 2 I would say) had managed to climb up on a playframe that clearly stated it was for the over 5's only, and was wandering towards an OPEN drop about 5ft off the ground, no staff were watching her, and I looked up and noticed her, and ran oevr shouting to get their attention, one of the staff then noticed and managed to catch ehr before she walked over the edge.

Afterwards I tried to find out the nursery they were from so I could ring the manager but I couldn;t.

I was completely gobsmacked, because the staff were virtually ignoring 2-3 of these little ones as they pottered about teh play frame, so it didn;t take much for one of the more adventurous ones to climb up.

While in their safe nursery environment, they may have been able to get away with less close supervision, the fact that they didn;t change their approach for an unfamiliar, potentially more dangerous environment was apalling.

And that is why I am not keen on unaccompanied trips for children this young.

MrsWho · 09/05/2007 20:02

Some car seats (not many) can be secured wth a lap belt but is only advised where there is no 3 point belt available.dd2s old seat had this onit.

Original poster

snowleopard · 09/05/2007 20:31

I suppose I would have to check out the coach on the day, car seat in hand, and then make a decision - which would be a bit confusing for DS. So probably better to just say no till he's older.

I really do appreciate all your posts - thanks.

OP posts:

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