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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not feel bad about "messing her hair up?"

68 replies

MerryShitmas · 26/03/2018 14:48

Basically; I used to be a hairdresser, I'm not anymore but retain my qualifications and experience and still have most appropriate equipment, so i do it in a pinch if a mate or family member needs help.
A friend, having a bad experience at the salon that left her with what looked almost like a bowl cut with fake hair badly attached (all her own hair) asked for my help, so I went over immediately to see what I could do. I said I could fix it, but there's no way I could've saved the length. It was bad, very bad despite layering as best I could to retain the length she ended up losing 2.5inches of her hair. I did tell her in advance that she could lose up to 4" but I would do my best. I did not charge her a thing even though the visit cost me time and money (including the hour each way drive - I
Consider her a good friend) a sidenote is I'm ill though not contagious and really could've done without it.
She's now unhappy with the length she lost, even though I measured it out for her and quadruple checked it would be ok. She's happy with how it looks but not happy to have lost "more than an inch". I've text back saying "look, I know it's upsetting as I have experienced this too, but try to understand that I genuinely did the best I could to keep as much length. Also I did ask you if it was okay, unfortunately when your hair is cut in such a way sometimes the options are limited" No reply as yet.

Aibu to be a bit annoyed that she's said this after I did a lot to help her, and not feel bad about "messing her hair up" because I did the best I could and she is happy with the style (looks a million times better) but is fucked off about the length which I can do nothing about...
Give it to me straight!

OP posts:
LoudBatPerson · 26/03/2018 17:12

She sounds horrid based on that text. At least you know to never do her a favour again.

MrsMozart · 26/03/2018 17:14

You did a very kind thing.

She is an arse.

Allthebestnamesareused · 26/03/2018 17:31

I think I'd reply saying:

You refer to me messing your hair up when in fact I was helping you to rectify your hairdresser's mistake. I suggest in future should you have a similar mishap you go back to the salon for help rather than ask me to, after all I told you on more than one occasion how much would need to be chopped off to sort out their mess!

Bumblesnuff4Crimpysnitch · 26/03/2018 18:16

This sounds like the woman who who posted here a couple of days ago saying what a mess her friend made layering her hair. Is this the same hair by any chance? If it is then I thought, from the photos, it looked OK! If not the same one then think we all know now to not ask friend to do our hair cut!!

Greyponcho · 26/03/2018 18:35

Sounds like she thinks centimetres are inches tbh...
you took 2.5 inches off which is 6 cm, which is more than the 4 she thought you’d take...?

PyongyangKipperbang · 26/03/2018 19:08

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3200905-AIBU-Hair-disaster

This thread?

WinnerWinnerChickenDinner0 · 26/03/2018 19:09

^^
Yep, that’s the one I was asking about.

All sounds very familiar doesn’t it Grin

MerryShitmas · 27/03/2018 05:17

Before I even start on the inconsistencies that thread was posted days before I cut her hair, so I'm good. Grin

Friend has got in touch with an apology, saying that even though she knew how much may have to come off she didn't know how much that would look like once it was taken off her hair, she was upset and lashed out at me but recognizes I couldn't really do anything else for her and is v sorry.

OP posts:
MrsSkeletor · 27/03/2018 05:32

I know you tried to help even it out, using your professional skills and with the best of intentions .... but.... why do hairdressers always say they 'have to' take inches off the hair when the client clearly doesn't want them to? Maybe your friend would have been happier with a less-than-perfect but better-than-horrendous cut even if your professional eye was dying to cut the lot of it off and start over.

Just asking, because I hear this 'have to' line in the salon a lot when the stylist wants to overrule my wishes... I'm like, no, at the hospital the doctor 'has to' do stuff, but here it's not lifesaving surgery, you don't 'have to' cut/dye/straighten anything I don't want done.

It was nice of you to help your friend, but I'm just saying if the only way to salvage it was to lose her length maybe you both should have left it alone, deciding that took priority. She had the responsibility to emphasise that though. I've just been around too many scissor-happy stylists who don't take no for an answer, snip snip...

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 27/03/2018 06:14

The hairdresser who invents a way of cutting hair longer rather than shorter will make a fortune

Allthebestnamesareused · 27/03/2018 13:47

Oh an apology.

I wonder if the friend is on mumsnet or at least someone else she knows

MrsMozart · 27/03/2018 16:40

Good an apology.

Hopefully all put behind and you can both move on.

Greyponcho · 27/03/2018 18:28

why do hairdressers always say they 'have to' take inches off the hair when the client clearly doesn't want them to?

Because otherwise it’ll look shit, nothing like what they want (not that we ever look like the picture we take in to them, except for genuine supermodels) and the customer will complain...? Maybe for the same reasons some salons don’t like you leaving wet hair because they want customers to leave with nice, finished hair that advertises their skills?

BugsyMcGee · 27/03/2018 18:37

Ungrateful cow, not to mention an idiot.

Tell her (with a possible side order of fuck off you ingrate):

I'm MerryShitmas, not Harry fucking Potter.

BugsyMcGee · 27/03/2018 18:40

Cross post, it's good she's seen her error.

ShortandAnnoying · 27/03/2018 18:45

Tell her you could do her some extensions and charge her £200

Schmonday · 27/03/2018 18:55

Saw this and thought of this thread...

To not feel bad about "messing her hair up?"
LemonysSnicket · 27/03/2018 21:48

Tell her to fuck of and give her head a shake. She was the twat, she got a bad hair cut and she should be grateful you offered help.

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