Oh FUCK - husband just overheard me having a conversation with myself!!

[DyingOfShame]

I am SO embarrassed right now.

The imaginary conversation was between me and a singing idol of mine. We were collaborating on something together when he suddenly announced that he had feelings for me and could no longer work with me, didn't want to cheat on his wife etc.....

I thought my husband had come up to bed 10 mins earlier and only realised when I got upstairs, that he was actually sat in the room off our kitchen!

FUCK!!! This is mortifying. He hasn't mentioned it but he surely heard me!

AIBU to run away and never come back?!

I'm honestly a bit surprised by the number of people thinking this is weird - everyone I've spoken to about having imaginary conversations does it, albeit it in slightly different ways. I keep mine in my head or at most mumble my own side of the conversation under my breath, but I do quite often forget to control my gestures - many's the time I've embarrassed myself by silently but furiously gesticulating in public during an 'argument'

I'm loving this thread - it's kind of comforting to know that everyone else has an imaginary life too, and all the 'hands-free phone conversations' I see going on in cars are actually chats to, or arguments with, imaginary friends, interviewers, etc. Hope this also goes for people in supermarkets with (fake) microphones strapped to their ears. It makes me feel happier about the world.

I'm honestly a bit surprised by the number of people thinking this is weird
but I do quite often forget to control my gestures - many's the time I've embarrassed myself by silently but furiously gesticulating in public during an 'argument' blush

Good grief and you don't think that is weird?!

He may have recorded you on his phone OP, was your tryst a long one?

I do this too, usually it involves an angsty scene with the current object of my affection (there is usually a whole backstory!) To be fair, I write a lot of fanfiction so it's practice for that really!!!

Oh Agpie don't! I really will die if it's been recorded. Hmm, the conversation started in the kitchen and then moved into the living room where hopefully I wasn't heard. 5 mins max.

He probably heard a minute or two of imaginary ramblings (complete with American accent)

I do it in my head.

Perhaps he's holding out and practicing his accent so you can use it as role play in the bedroom

Just make a joke about it and laugh it off with your DH. Better than making it a big deal.

To be fair, I write a lot of fanfiction so it's practice for that really!!

Fanfiction has given us amazing insights into how many of our fantasies are shared. Done well (I'm sure you're one of the good writers!!) it can be really powerful stuff, in a different way to mainstream literature.

I certainly run through job interview questions, or explain things I've been working on to people, in the shower. It's a really useful exercise. A chance to rehearse and check if I've got things straight, or the point I want to make makes sense (a great revision technique) - before actually saying it to a real person.

I consider this a moment of being 'especially myself', reaching into my mind and projecting outwards, to straighten up and test what's there, in relation to the outside world. For that reason, while I would imagine talking to someone, I would never do their voice. For me, it's about practicing being me at my best, not acting.

What I wonder is whether this explains why many compulsive chatterboxes are such unimaginative people. They have to 'project and rehearse' with real people, because they don't have the imaginative power required to do it in private.

That might not be considered 'weird' (though I think it is) but it is very, very irritating and tedious.

Btw I notice that that 'maladaptive daydreaming' definition is about daydreaming being intrusive, a fantasy life taking over from real life and getting in the way.

That seems to me to be the very opposite of people using quiet moments in real life to rehearse something useful or entertaining.

Just as any hobby or habit becomes problematic if it intrudes into 'real life' activities to the extent it prevents them happening but is fine if used to wind down in quiet moments.

In fact I'd go further and suggest that compulsive chatterboxes - the sort who just go on and on AT you, instead of taking part in a proper conversations, are casting real people as their imaginary friends. Perhaps they lack the basic empathy required to understand that other people are not a product of their own mind.

That strikes me as far more worrying and delusional - and it's certainly more annoying - than using your imagination.

GreatDuck oh sure, I'm fully aware that that part is weird In general though, I don't think talking to yourself/having imaginary conversations is particularly unusual... or I just know a lot of weird people, that's also a definite possibility

I don't want to bring it up, just in case there is the smallest possibility that he didn't hear me

I talk to the dog and the cats allllll the time. I'm not sure whether that's quite the same thing because at least they are sentient. But I'm pretty sure they have no idea what i'm saying to them. I do also sing to the dog quite a bit. He gets power-ballad serenaded sometimes and other times I just make up little ditties about what he looks like and how much he smells.

At least that's entrenched in reality I suppose.

Oh I can so relate to this. I have imaginary conversations not audibly but do move my lips (I at least think they are not audible) and my DH asks me all the time who are you talking to and justs laughs. Think he has just got used to it now. Yes at least in the car people hopefully think you are on hands free

That's a really interesting theory, lottiegarbanzo - I don't suppose there's a way to test it, but it makes intuitive sense. The people I know who have that tendency to talk 'at' me will very often go over the same topics (usually complaints) again and again, and they'll chunter to me/themselves about things other people have done instead of addressing it with the person who's actually wronged them - both things I do when talking in my head.

That seems to me to be the very opposite of people using quiet moments in real life to rehearse something useful or entertaining.

Maladaptive daydreaming is the exact opposite of people rehearsing real life scenarios. It's more being immersed in a fantasy where you speak to fictional characters (or real life people whom you've never met and fantasize a personality/dialogue for).

I always have elaborate day dreams. Sometimes i am caught out arguing with my imaginary rockstar boyfriend by gesticulating or mouthing in public sometimes the odd word out loud 😂 i have so many action packed daydreams i sometimes forget what i am doing at work and at home. Your so weird op. I like it.

I do this all the time, in my head but I can say the parts that I'm playing out loud sometimes. I've done this since I was little for many different scenarios.

If I'm weird I'm weird, we're all different and personally I see nothing wrong with it as you're not harming anyone.

I also do it after talking to someone on the phone, as if I'm carrying on the conversation and analysing the things I've said.

Don't be embarrassed. My OH would just laugh with me then forget it.

You're amateurs. I was Being The Lady President of an unnamed country yesterday. I sorted out everything, including the vaccination schedule for under fives.

Reading this, I realise that it looks like a lie, but it is not. Two hours in the car on my own and I can fix anything

I was travelling with my friend years ago around NZ. We were outside a cafe and she went in to get coffee etc. Apparently I used this time to delve into an excellent daydream as she watched me gesturing and mouthing away to myself from inside and thought I had entirely lost the plot.

Correction: maladaptive daydreaming is where daydreaming adversely impacts your real life.

Normal daydreaming is as the op’s.

And for all the "you're weird" naysayers - I know. I got my head round this a very long time ago. And it's ok for you to be a bit freaked out and to not know how to react if you see someone having a conversation with themselves, it's ok for you to think it's weird behaviour. It's not ok to infer that it's a mental illness in it's own right - my mental health crisis team categorically stated that it is not .