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AIBU?

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Original poster

Is staying in bed all day normal?

86 replies

thisisthend · 25/03/2018 14:02

I have tried to be more proactive, but it always ends up being the same because there is just nothing out there in terms of activities. I have no friends, despite making so much effort to befriend people. When I have nothing to do, as in uni, work, or other essentials, I just sit on my bed all day on my laptop. I don't think this is how other people live their lives, but I have nothing and no one else. I am just so fed up of living. It feels like such a waste, especially when I am 26, but there's never anything else that is free or constructive. What do you do with your day?(weekdays and weekends)

OP posts:
TheReluctantFundaFeminist · 25/03/2018 14:30

You asked whether staying in bed all day is normal. The consensus so far seems to be that no, it isn't.

Now what?

Are YOU concerned about it? Do YOU want to change it?

Do you have any of your own thoughts/ideas (other than that we're all brainwashed)?

Cupoteap · 25/03/2018 14:31

Was going to say this is how I spent yesterday but not sure I want to admit being part of your little gang....

Twirlyvvf · 25/03/2018 14:33

Its fine sometimes if you feel better fir it, but you are obviously not happy so no. Go for a walk, do some writing/drawing/something creative

Teaonthelawn · 25/03/2018 14:33

I went through something similar in my mid-twenties. Looking back I think I was depressed which made it more difficult to motivate myself to get out of the house. Things gradually improved and my life moved forward. However I think if I had recognised that I was feeling depressed I would have thought about asking for some help and maybe things would have improved sooner. I would have a chat with your GP.

Jaxhog · 25/03/2018 14:35

If you ignore all the good suggestions and advice you've already been given, then how can you expect anything to change? There is no magic bullet. It isn't perfect for the rest of us either. The difference is that we have made an effort and got on with life. If this is too hard, then go and talk to your doctor and get some help. Nothing will change otherwise.

RedBlackberries · 25/03/2018 14:35

I get really down if I spend to long in bed. Get outside for a gentle walk and try to do one pro active thing i your day even if it's just posting a letter or something.

speakout · 25/03/2018 14:36

OP perhaps you do need help though.

I have experienced depression and anxiety in the past and these things do have an impact on lives.
But they can be fixed.
My depression was solved though drug treatment and counselling, and my anxiety was fixed through CBT.
Looking back I had been suffering anxiety for decades, but CBT has been a life changer for me. I practice almost daily and I am confident that anxiety attacks are a thing of the past for me. I have not had any anxiety or depression for 8 years.

The NHS have really helped my mental health.

Sprinklesinmyelbow · 25/03/2018 14:36

I used to stay in bed all day at the weekends when I was 26. Recharging from a hard week working and socialising

Gwenhwyfar · 25/03/2018 14:37

Well it's 2.30 and I'm still sitting in my pjs, telling myself I should get out because everything will be closed by 5, but I really can't motivate myself. I'm sitting up because I'm on the computer. If I was reading, I'd be in bed.

Sprinklesinmyelbow · 25/03/2018 14:37

But I think I was a lot more normal than you sound

Dolphincrossing · 25/03/2018 14:37

I often do. I find going out makes me feel worse.

speakout · 25/03/2018 14:37

And no, I never spend a day in bed.

Life is far too exciting.

user1469485133 · 25/03/2018 14:38

You asked the question is it normal to stay in bed all day? The answer is no, it isn't normal.

I would suggest volunteering for something you believe in. What would you like to do? I think that's the question.

Steamcloud · 25/03/2018 14:39

Please let's not all pile on the op. She's had mh issues in the past and has clearly asked for suggestions other than seeing the gp.

KriticalSoul · 25/03/2018 14:40

if you've nothing else to do, then its normal, other people sit on their sofa all day on their laptop doing fuck all (like me lol, well, i'm also doing art and writing stories, but still)

What you need to is motivate yourself to find other things to do to fill your time. Volunteer, go for a walk, get a dog and take it for a walk (there is a thing called 'borrow my dog' online where people will look for 'buddies' to come walk their dog for them because they can't) or you can find a local animal shelter and see if they need walkers.

Take up a hobby, go wander around craft stores...etc

There's stuff you can do, but if you WANT to sit on your laptop doing bugger all, there's nothing wrong with that either.

speakout · 25/03/2018 14:40

Today I was at the supermarket at 8.30am, yoga class at 9. I have stripped and washed all the sheets ( drying outside) and now I am about to start work ( I run a craft business from home- but my " work" is really fun)

Steamcloud · 25/03/2018 14:40

Sorry; typed that before more sympathetic responses appeared!

SusannahL · 25/03/2018 14:42

Have you namechanged op?

Your post and the way you express yourself sound very familiar.

GnotherGnu · 25/03/2018 14:43

You're at university and you seriously contend there are no activities out there that you can do? Have you actually checked?

Runninglateeveryday · 25/03/2018 14:45

You need to get out there OP or what's going to change , and you don't sound at all happy as you are. Have you struggled to find work or are you to unwell? Volunteer? There is some meet up website my friend used too.

NFATR · 25/03/2018 14:47

You need some serious help and probably some very strong medication.

SofieMonde · 25/03/2018 14:48

The OP's 'paranoia' could well hold a certain truth. Some more forward-thinking clinics in certain countries are very critical of the DSM and say that it is not correct in lumping certain depressions together. It does not account for people who suffer from subtypes and treats everyone with universal antidepressants ie. Prosac

These clinics treat people as individuals and not as a generic depressed person, therefore they get the correct diagnosis, treatment, medication and recovery.
I can totally understand why the OP has lost faith in the NHS MH system. You do not have to be sectioned to have lost faith. It is a system that has failed many due to being dictated to by an outdated and incorrect DSM.

Buxbaum · 25/03/2018 14:48

OP, with only the kindest of intentions I've reported this thread. I don't think there is anyone here who is able to give you the support that you need.

MabelWotsits · 25/03/2018 14:51

You don't seem very well to me. I've reported your thread and hope you're better soon.

Mummyoflittledragon · 25/03/2018 14:52

I spend a lot of time in bed because I’m chronically ill. I’ve had a lot of help with my mental health to deal with becoming so fragile and frail. I pay for my therapists so no societal control going on. Au contraire, it has allowed me to become a person in my own right instead of a piece of shit to be abused by my family. Believe it is societal control all you want. One woman I saw for several years has some very interesting and non conforming beliefs. She has detached as much as possible from society in terms of media, government etc and interacts with like minded people. She feels a lot more at peace for it.