Fucking Lanyards

[MrsMaxwell]

I work for the LA and we have to wear an ID badge on a lanyard AT ALL TIMES as now cannot access any rooms without it or do any printing. I don’t really have an issue with it although I do find it bloody annoying to wear.

8 years I have been there and every now and then I change the actual Lanyard just to jazz it up a bit.

New boss yesterday asks me “do you have a LA lanyard” I’m like “I’m not sure maybe” she’s like “well you should be wearing one as it makes you more identifyable” FFS other than the ID badge and my actual face

I do like yanking admittedly..

My NHS trust has banned lanyards on infection control grounds. We now have a clip on the pocket thing and no where to attach your keys and pen. I miss my lanyard.

I love a retractable waist worn lanyard.
I just love the word lanyard. I didn’t know it was a lanyard for years, just thought it was a badge. But I love using it in my vocabulary now.
Lanyard, lanyard, lanyard

Also LA here.
I was once asked where my lanyard was...I pointed to it at the side of my desk and was told I should be wearing it.... I was SAT AT MY DESK. I was not going into different areas. I was not impersonating council workers knocking on doors in the community. I was SAT AT MY DESK. In a secure area through which I had entered using my pass and sodding lanyard. Just like I had for the past 3 years.

I mean, I’m completely over it obviously. —still raging—

I have worn a lanyard for all of my working life (bank call centres) and there hasn’t been one I haven’t had to pick the plastic sewing off around the yuck release tab and re-sew with cotton because they have been so itchy.
To be honest I can’t imagine life without one now. Which is sad

Yuck release= quick release sorry

Oh mate !!!! Have these people got nothing else to think about. Fecking lanyards !!!

I hate lanyards. We once had a patient swan into our office (down a long long corridor with numerous ‘staff only’ signs) and nobody had stopped her because she had an NHS lanyard on so they presumed she was meant to be there.

MIne is ok with the little toggle thing to access all areas but not if I wear my ID badge. When I lean over to look at kids' work I am forever clonking them on the head with it

I often wear mine back to front (so the card is hanging down my back and I have a weird chocker thing at the front. It doesn’t look great (but no worse than at the front) and it stops it banging against my desk/dangling in my lunch.

They make me feel like an animal wearing a leash... I know someone who was walking on a windy day and his whipped up and the metal part CUT HIS FACE!!!! Don't wear mine much at all but then I don't move around much either.

My fob has scratched my face off my lanyard, in a strange homage to the ring.
I am so used to using it that sometimes I try to open my front door with it, and get a bit befuddled when it doesn’t work.

I wore my U2 Joshua Tree 30th Anniversary tour one for ages, but I start a new job on Monday and I noticed at the interview they all wear red ones with the company name on...gutted.

Could you get asmall image of the corporation lanyard tattooed on your face? And teen just wear whatever lanyard you like.

I am fat and huge of boob, lanyards are too decking short for me and I look like an utter twat while wearing it. Still, it has my fob, whistle, selection of coloured marking pens, and my locker key on it so is a necessary evil.

I made myself a longer length one once, then some fucker stole my handbag and it was lost.

Ours are white and mine gets stained with make up 🙄

I hate Mine ( school based) it itches my neck. I have so many things hanging off it, whistle, pen and other stuff that I'd knock a child out if a bent over to help them.
I wear mine round my waist.

I'm in retail, we used to have name badges that had to be on the left side of our shirts. Nice and visible, but out of the way. Sensible. Now we have company lanyards that hang down so low they're hidden behind the counter, and they have an extending coil thing, so we're forever accidentally getting them caught on boxes of stock and you never realise until the fucking card pings back towards you when the extension runs out! Pisses me right off, bring back the old badges.

At my last school, every door was swipe carded. Also, all lifts, printers, machines. A bugger if you left it at home.
It's all fingerprint at my new place, much handier, can't forget my finger!

One school I visit insists on giving you a visitors Lanyard so you have to wear two Lanyards and feel like Ross from Friends with the two name badges.

Also my photo is so faded as to be unrecognisable. I keep meaning to cut pictures of models out from magazines and use them. I did once have Marge Simpson over my photo for a while. No one noticed.

I hate them because I am very short and it just gets in the way of typing etc. I'm also just one of those people irritated by things hanging off me/about my person e.g. I hate tight clothes, jewellery, make up etc. Having this thing hanging off my neck makes me feel claustraphobic.....yes I'm a bit nuts!

Surely making everyone where the same colour lanyard so they are easily identifiable is worse than no ID at all.

It makes it easy to accept someone should be where they are by virtue of being in possession of the correct lanyard and rendering the actual information and picture of the ID mostly irrelevant as people are accepted as authorised by the easily purchased lanyard.

All a bit bizarre.

*wear

When I went to watch the 2012 Olympics I bought a lanyard from the gift shop to wear at work. Every new person I met asked me if what event I competed in. They were not joking.