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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do you leave your toddler to shower?

95 replies

GreenVoyage · 23/03/2018 08:48

I'm not working until later and need a shower beforehand. DD is 20 months and not in nursery until I drop her off at lunch time.

I take her upstairs with me and lock the babygate. My bedroom door is shut tight and DD is in her room with a door stop on top to stop trapped fingers. DD will either sit on her beanbag with a tablet or play with her toy kitchen. The bathroom door is open the whole time and she pops in and out to see me.

AIBU to do this? My friend is horrified! I think DD is perfectly safe. I don't believe that all single parents only ever shower when their DCs are asleep.

OP posts:
Idontdowindows · 23/03/2018 08:49

I don't see what the problem is. She's safe, you're near, she can't fall down the stairs or drown in the toilet while you're showering...

MrsHouseBrownie · 23/03/2018 08:50

That's what I did. It was either that or not shower!

mumoffivegirls · 23/03/2018 08:52

Absolutely fine, your daughter is perfectly safe and the bathroom door is open if she needs you..

SunnyCoco · 23/03/2018 08:52

Sounds fine to me 👍

FittonTower · 23/03/2018 08:53

I did the same when mine were that age, im not a single parent but my husband works long hours and works away so im often alone. I prefered a bath but even in the evening my 2 would wake up regularly so id be hopping in and out of the bath all the time, a shower when they were safetly occupied was easier all round.

GoldenHefalump · 23/03/2018 08:53

Can't see what's wrong with that at all.

I take ds3 (10 months) in the bathroom with me...he spends the whole time playing drums on the toilet seat Grin

NerNerNerNerBATMAN · 23/03/2018 08:53

How else are you supposed to shower? What does your friend do??

windchimesabotage · 23/03/2018 08:54

Yes I used to do exactly the same. Not sure what your friend is worried about?

AnyFucker · 23/03/2018 08:54

Yes

Mydoghatesthebath · 23/03/2018 08:56

It’s what normal people do.

Your friend sounds insane

ethelfleda · 23/03/2018 09:00

I thought the title meant that you leave your toddler to have a shower! Grin

But No, YANBU!

Happymummy1991 · 23/03/2018 09:02

Yes when I read the title I was like whaaaaat no you can't leave a toddler to shower by themself haha.
But yeah what you do is absolutely fine and normal!

HollyBayTree · 23/03/2018 09:05

Im in one of those moods today - but only on MN have I ever come across the phenomenon where babies and toddlrs are lugged to a bathroom when ever mum needs to use the toilet or have shower. Most people manage to do this round nap times. having a wee - it takes 30 seconds, you do not need to drag a child away from its toys to watch you.

Teenytinyvoice · 23/03/2018 09:05

I pop my LO in the cot with toys and books.

Hypermice · 23/03/2018 09:06

I don’t but only because I have nowhere he can safely sit and see me and he goes nuts if left alone. If I had to I’d probably work out a way

Katyb1310 · 23/03/2018 09:08

I did every morning or I would never had had a chance to shower because DH leaves for work really early. She was absolutely fine. I left the bathroom door open so I could hear her x

Abetes · 23/03/2018 09:11

Sounds fine to me. My house isn’t set up in a way that I could do what you do - so I had to have dc in the bathroom with me with a pile of toys or in the cot with toys but I would definitely do it your way if I could.

Camomila · 23/03/2018 09:14

No I shower before DH leaves for work or when he naps.

I have no safe place to leave DS as he doesn't have a cot or playpen and can reach all the door handles.

My friend puts on the bbc iplayer app on and puts her DD in her cot with the tablet and that works well.

kaytee87 · 23/03/2018 09:15

I take my 20mo in the shower with me and he plays in the bath but your way sounds fine too.
Does your friend never leave their toddler in a room by themselves?

greenyblue · 23/03/2018 09:16

Mine wouldn't have stayed on her own but she'd be happy toddling round the bathroom and watching me in the shower...

MuncheysMummy · 23/03/2018 09:17

I do same as you OP we have a fixed (drilled into the wall) Baby gate at the top and bottom of our stairs so I can safely let 21 month old DS play upstairs whilst I have a quick shower or do jobs etc

Original poster
GreenVoyage · 23/03/2018 09:18

Thanks! I feel much better now and way less guilty. No she doesn't ever leave her DS alone! Not even to wee! Well that's what she claims. I couldn't leave DD in a cot as she would try to climb out and is therefore more likely to hurt herself.

OP posts:
Allthebestnamesareused · 23/03/2018 09:18

Phew - I thought you were going to say you let your toddler have a shower on their own (unreasonable and dangerous).

But of course they can entertain themselves while you shower or how else would any mother or carer get out of the house - ever.

MuncheysMummy · 23/03/2018 09:20

He can now climb in and òut of his cot and open doors so my options are a bit limited!

Dagnabit · 23/03/2018 09:22

YANBU - she's not far from 2 and you've left her in a safe situation for less than 15 minutes, in a room nearby.

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