Lifts for kids wwyd?

[Spicylolly]

Multiple choice wwyd.

Background: DD year 9, to get to school its 15/20 min walk (uphill) to the station, 10/15min train ride and then a 15/20 min walk (uphill) to the school. And obviously vice versa back home but always usually picked up from home station as fits in with parents work pattern & and are nearby/passing.
Lift to school isn't really an option, too far away and sibling is at a local primary school, they leave about 45 mins later to drop them off. Parent leaves for work about 9.30am/10.00am ish

A) Always drive them to the first station, that's a long walk either end.

B) Drive them to the first station if the weather is nasty, otherwise walking is fine.

C) Never drive them to the first station, they are at secondary school now.

D) Drive them occasionally but make sure they earn it/know it's because of good behaviour

E) Drive them all the way to the school gates and arrange alternate arrangements for the other younger child. (Just threw that in for fun...no one is that mad to to do that surely!? Lol)

F) They should walk to AND from the home town station they are 14 now regardless of how far they have to walk either end.

Interested to hear your thoughts 🙂

I'd do whatever the child wanted within reason.

Most kids at that age want to walk with their friends but if she was walking on her own ever day I'd be happy to drop her at the station.

I really don't like option D
D) Drive them occasionally but make sure they earn it/know it's because of good behaviour

I do things for my DD because she's my child and I like to be nice to her, she doesn't need to earn me dropping her up the road

I had similar, if not farther, when I was at senior school and only ever got a lift for the first bit if it happened to coincide with my dad getting a lift to the station. Also had to get up and do the same on Saturday mornings if I had a match. Probably the reason I never had to worry about my weight when I was young.

Honestly, this 'doing nice things for your kids' stuff drives me nuts - it's infantilising. There's nothing wrong with phasing in responsibilities.

Its perfectly possible to be nice to your teens and still instill responsibility and independence into them.My two 6th formers rarely ask for lifts, are out and about on foot all the time (even though eldest has his own car) and do almost everything independently of me these days. Its usually me who will text them and say I am near school or station at such a time and do they want a lift because I like having a natter in the car, because I am nice, and because they are so often out (and will be off to uni soon) its nice to actually have 10 mins catching up with them.

nokidshere - I was thinking more of the people who think A is the only option, because it is being 'nice' and being 'nice' can only possibly involve doing things for children as default, not the situation you describe.

Thecatsthecats Spot on !

I take DS to school purely because I'm driving to work anyway at around that time and it's not far out of my way, and it's the best way of ensuring he gets there on time. He makes his own way home.

Last year he got a punctuality prize. I felt like contacting the school and demanding that it be given to me, as he would never have earned it without me hounding him out of bed and out of the house and taking him to school.

A - why wouldn’t you want to be nice to your own child??!!

Another vote for the unwritten option of adding a bike to the commute. You can get some great pannier bags that convert to either a rucksack or a messenger bag (and are waterproof in case of inclement weather!)
A 20 minutes uphill walk will take less than 10 minutes by bike.

Reserve lifts for when truly convenient or the weather is truly awful (and not suitable for bikes!)

Only problem with bikes is they get stolen from the station DS brand new bike was stolen the first day he rode to the station.

@bruffin - what sort of bike lock was he using? I recommend registering bikes with the Bike Register too. www.bikeregister.com (its free to register)
Anyway in this case I'd suggest taking the bike the whole route for the other part of the commute after the train ride.

Ds is the same age and has a similar commute (SS grammar in the next county). When we agreed to put that school on the form we knew it would a lift to/from the station everyday. He leaves the house in the dark Nov-Feb !

However either dh or I do it on our way to work, not a special trip

We did buy the wrong lock. There was a spate of stolen bikes from station ay the time. That was a few years ago and he is adult now and drives to work.

A

I always try to make their life easier.

Mine have a 40 min hilly walk to and from school each day, they just get on with it but very much appreciated the occasional lift that got them a bit closer to school (missing out he first hill!)