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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not be particularly pleased when ds comes home from nursery having read a book about all the monsters in Dr Who?

182 replies

FrannyandZooey · 08/05/2007 18:33

Another child brought it in, and he and ds spent the morning looking at it.

I would rather things like this from home were "oohed" over briefly by staff before being put away on a high shelf "to keep it safe until home time".

Ds particularly interested in "The Garlics"

"Mummy why do the Garlics try to kill Dr. Who?"

OP posts:
Miaou · 08/05/2007 22:33

obi, I don't think that makes you a bad mother! But it's not my personal choice and I won't inflict it on other children at the nursery because it may not be the choice of other parents either. Given the amount of toys/books/activities we have at nursery, I really don't think that is at all restrictive.

Nutty, lol - bit of a long commute I think

NuttyMuffins · 08/05/2007 22:36

His nursery teacher said that if she has to listen to him talk about Spiderman anymore she won't be responsible for her actions . i think he talks the ears off the poor woman.

edam · 08/05/2007 22:45

If children are interested in watching a toy, I can't see any harm in it. Don't see why playing with blocks is somehow 'better' for them than playing with Spiderman on a motorbike, tbh. You could argue that it's exercising their attention span or powers of concentration, for instance!

pointydog · 08/05/2007 22:45

lack of prior knowledge can easily be addressed. Doesn't mean if it's not there, there's no way forward.

Which I'm sure you know - just think we disagree on this one

Miaou · 09/05/2007 08:16

Edam, I don't see any value in sitting watching a toy going round in circles. When we got the blocks out, we were working on fine and gross motor skills, colour identification, conservation (ie can they identify which tower is bigger and which is smaller) etc etc. These days we have the same kind of targets to meet and boxes to tick as a school does - during an academic year we have a huge amount of goals and topics to cover.

They are only in pre-school for three hours a day (less when they are younger) - plenty of time for them to spend hours poring over a Doctor Who book or watching a spiderman toy until the batteries run down in the rest of their time away from pre-school!

Pointy, you are right - we will have to agree to disagree!

FioFio · 09/05/2007 08:20

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twentypence · 09/05/2007 08:28

I had a woman today who wouldn't join in with "I know an old woman who swallowed a fly". I didn't ask why, it could be because she's vegan (I know she is vegan)I suppose - but that would seem extreme.

This is the same woman whose daughter had never heard Baa Baa Black sheep at age 5.

I found this a bit much as they are songs which are very much sung to preschool children. It wasn't like I'd brought in some Britney Spears or something.

I don't like commercial tie in products either - but ds loves them. The proviso for me is that it should be something he already knows about - so a really crap Bugs Life story book would be okay - but a birthday Superman building breaking toy found it's way onto Ebay pretty quickly.

juuule · 09/05/2007 08:39

Miaou, I find it quite sad that you don't see any value in children of 3/4 watching a toy going round in circles. They are learning all the time. Everything a child does shouldn't have to be broken down into targets and tick boxes. If you did need to break down the learning then maybe the child is learning about forces, speed, balance, batteries, electricity, colour, road safety and as Edam says concentration. The child could be learning all kinds of things from playing with the toy but is taken away from playing with it to take part in someone else's idea of a 'better' learning experience which fits adults targets and outcomes and goals. It seems a bit like waking someone up to take a sleeping pill to me.

catsmother · 09/05/2007 09:52

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Miaou · 09/05/2007 13:54

"I find it quite sad that you don't see any value in children of 3/4 watching a toy going round in circles."

Seriously?? You think that is a good use of educational time???

"Everything a child does shouldn't have to be broken down into targets and tick boxes."

Well that's education for you! We have a curriculum we have to follow and though we have a lot of freedom within it, we still have a certain amount of things to cover in a term.

"If you did need to break down the learning then maybe the child is learning about forces, speed, balance, batteries, electricity, colour, road safety and as Edam says concentration."

We touched on these points when we had it on the table at talk time.

"The child could be learning all kinds of things from playing with the toy but is taken away from playing with it to take part in someone else's idea of a 'better' learning experience which fits adults targets and outcomes and goals."

We're back to the aims, structure and curriculum of education. I don't make the rules.

CS1753 · 09/05/2007 14:06

Franny, my DS is 4 and up until this weekend I would have agreed with you, still don't let him watch Dr Who but this weekend he came home from playing with a friend and I had Pirates of the Caribbean on he plonked himself down and I tried to cover his eyes while I frantically sought out the remote - the scene where all the skeletons are walkling about was on. He promptly informed me 'stop being silly mummy I like the scary bits, it's just pretend' well I felt right put in my place - still turned it off though!!

GreebosWhiskers · 09/05/2007 14:17

My 2.2 year old dd loves Dr Who - I tried on a long mac thing in M&S the other day & wound up buying it when she informed me it was 'like Dr Who's coat'. I didn't let her watch last weekend's episode tho' as the trailers looked a bit scary. She thinks the daleks are funny - when I was small they scared the piss out of me. I used to tell myself I was okay 'cos my room was upstairs so they couldn't get me & then one day they learned how to fly aaarrrgh.

Actually, after the first dalek episode of the Chris Ecclestone series I had a dream that it was chasing me along our street so they obviously still scare me

edam · 09/05/2007 18:19

Glad to hear it catsmother as I thoroughly approve of Dr Who!

Maiou I get your point about three hours a day but I'm with Juule on this. 'A good use of educational time' makes me raise my eyebrows a bit - it's preschool, not GCSE year, surely it should be learning through play? What makes me uncomfortable is the idea that tick boxes and targets have taken over to the point where children aren't allowed to play with what interests them because the adults think it's not 'improving' or 'educational' enough. Seems a terribly Gadgrindian, reductionist view of learning for small children to me.

I'm not having a go at you, just interested in the thinking behind the goals and targets that are set for pre-school learning. If this is what Osted says you should be doing - not letting small children play with the things that interest them then I think there's something wrong with the system. Learning shouldn't be something artificial that adults inflict on small children, it's just what they do all the time naturally. Surely any nursery or pre-school setting should be supporting that, not obstructing it? Who decides what sort of play has value and what sort doesn't? Is watching raindrops run down a windowsill OK, or not?

sunnysideup · 09/05/2007 18:30

I think a 3 to 4 yr old watching something go round in circles is a good use of 'educational' time, yes.

I think targets etc for this age group are crazed. So long as they are getting some social interaction out of attending a group, and the adults involved are kindly and nurturing, they will learn more than enough.

rabbleraiser · 09/05/2007 18:39

Haven't read the whole thread, but my ds (2.6) loves Dr Who. Whenever I'm on the computer he asks me to 'show him the monsters.'

I do get where you're coming from on this, Franny ... but I don't know, there's something about Dr Who that makes it OK for me. Children learn when they're engaged ... and Dr Who is a very engaging concept; good old fashioned good versus evil, after all. It could be worse.

Original poster
FrannyandZooey · 09/05/2007 18:44

He did wake up in the night and call for me, but I never ask him what has bothered him when that happens (seems to upset him more and he usually refuses to say anyway)

so it could have been the Garlics or anything

No science-fiction monsters evident at nursery today - there must have been a purge I reckon

OP posts:
Original poster
FrannyandZooey · 09/05/2007 18:44

He did wake up in the night and call for me, but I never ask him what has bothered him when that happens (seems to upset him more and he usually refuses to say anyway)

so it could have been the Garlics or anything

No science-fiction monsters evident at nursery today - there must have been a purge I reckon

OP posts:
sunnysideup · 09/05/2007 18:52

hmm, does this mean I owe you a choc bar or not?

I think it's not proven.

rabbleraiser · 09/05/2007 19:23

They would have been exterminated!

Aloha · 09/05/2007 19:25

Found out today that dd (2) knows all about the 'monters' on Dr Who! She is remarkable blase about them too.

Fillyjonk · 09/05/2007 19:29

no you are NOT being feckin unreasonable

i would be utterly, utterly . only more so.

dr who scares me, I only watch it really because it is really set in cardiff and david tennant looks like dp, (only a little less handsome)

RubyRioja · 09/05/2007 19:32

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Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fillyjonk · 09/05/2007 19:43

see my 3 1/2 yo doesn't really get reality/fantasy. he seems to, but if you go deep down, he DOESN'T get it.

My BIG concern with dr who really is the normalisation of violence.

RubyRioja · 09/05/2007 19:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fillyjonk · 09/05/2007 19:52

well i do pretty much agree ruby

so think that franny IS being utterly reasonable. in her judgement her ds shouldn't be watching it. yep.

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