To want my 9week old in a routine

[Housequeen101]

Mums help!

My 9 week old has a dairy allergy and reflux. She’s on special milk and doesn’t agree with the reflux medicine so she doesn’t have anything for her reflux.

Of an evening she has a bath at 6.30 then a bottle and sleeps in her cot downstairs with us, she doesn’t normally wake for a feed, we go to bed at 11 so at 11 she has a bum change then taken upstairs for a bottle. She then wakes at around 3 has a bottle then is awake for 2 hours, I have to rock her until she falls asleep, the night feeds I can deal with but not being up for 2 hours. She doesn’t have a decent sleep during the day as the second I put her down she’s bolt awake, I have another DC so she can’t sleep on me all day.

I’m thinking a routine might help her during the night, what’s your routines?

Was thinking of putting her to sleep in her cot upstairs, after her bath so we don’t have to wake her when we go up to bed, do you think she’s too young for this?

Thanks

Yes far too young for a routine! But i have another on the way so will be interested to see what others say

I’d say she’s much too young for a routine. Read about the fourth trimester. It’s completely normal for them to be awake at night.

Could she sleep in a sling on you during the day?

I had a thread about this yesterday. My nine week old sleeps on me pretty much 24/7. I also have another so am becoming adept at doing things one handed. I'll watch this thread with interest.

I always find Gina Ford is bang on with feeding and sleeping times. It's fits well with busy family life too. I'm not rigid about it but do find it helpful as a guide. Check out the timings, it always amazed me that even if I wasn't looking at GF schedules my babies were doing a very similar timing for everything anyway.

I think if you try and force a newborn into a routine you will just make your life a lot harder.

Watching with interest as I have a 9 week old too, he sleeps on at night but we have zero structure in the daytime and DS doesn't nap much at all!

Just guesses here, but have you tried a dummy to help settle her after the night feed? Possibly worth a go?

Or keeping her up later than 6.30? If that's when she starts the bedtime routine then she's had quite a lot if sleep already by 3 am. DS feeds around 3 am but he doesn't go down for the night until about 9 or 10 so is still pretty sleepy for the night feed. He then feeds again about 6 and wakes for the day around 7.30-8. He arrived at that pattern by himself though, it's not a routine we consciously put in place.

Dd2 put herself into a routine around this age but it was bath at 7.30, then feed then upstairs in bed for 8.30

But she was sleeping 6-8 blocks from about 2 weeks (so naturally a good sleeper) and did nap on me or the bouncey chair during the day.

At that age if she goes to bed at 6.30 and sleeps for a solid block of hours I'd be doing the same, I wouldn't be staying up until 11pm.

I agree a routine at this age will just make you feel frustrated.

But have you tried a Babocoush? My friend had a baby with reflux and swears by it.

At 9 wks old the majority of babies just want to be close to someone. I really wouldn't lpsh anything else.

Not a believer in a tiny baby having a routine. They have one naturally!

Not sleeping in the day won't help. A sling to keep her asleep?

With both of mine I got into a daytime routine of getting out of the house by a certain time so that baby was either in the car or pram at nap time. A sling is a good idea too so she can sleep on you without pinning you down.

At night, does she need the nappy change at 11pm? Unless it's dirty/really full I'd definitely leave it until she wakes herself

Not sure if this will help but we use a projector light that makes wave patterns on the ceiling so if DS is awake after a night feed he can lie and look at that until he falls asleep. We only use the red light setting as it's more womb like. To be fair, he has always been mostly quite content to lie in his cot though.

I don't agree with this sitting around all day with a Velcro baby. If you want to that's fine. But most people have too much other things they need to be getting on with to do that. Just put her down whether she's awake or not after a while of rocking.

She doesn't nap during the day? Sleep begets sleep. I'd try to sort naps out, whether in a sling/pram/car.

Horses for courses, if you want to try s routine then do so if you feel it will work for you. No harm in trying at all. I know Gina Ford is hated in some quarters but i’m A fab. I did her routine straight from the start and it worked a dream for me. My dd is now 10 years old, happy and doing well in all areas so it hasn’t had any ill effects - thought i’d Get that in before those that don’ Think a routine is a good idea. Everyone is different, so what is right for you.

• so do what is right for you.

As pp posters have said to young for a routine.

Bless her, she is just getting used to being outside.

Hugs & for you

OP DD was in a routine by 6w.

We used Elizabeth Pantley's gentle sleep method. It involves observing your baby's natural patterns for a few days then using those to create a bespoke routine..eg we observed that DD got cranky and tired around 10.30am so I started putting her for a nap at 10.15 before she had chance to get overtired. She always came alive around 7pm so we put her bath then.

It was s bit of trial and error but we soon had a.routine that worked for the first 5-6 mos. What was key was consistent getting up times and getting out for fresh air and sunlight daily, and then making nighttimes exaggeratedly dark amd quiet, as this supposedly helps the baby learn the difference betweem day and night.

Good luck!

Just fyi our routine was sth like

8am up and nappy change
Sling or bouncy chair whilst I did breakfast and tidy up

950-10am breastfeed, in cot by 10.15, normally slept till 11.30ish

Up and feed, cuddles and playmat or baby group, my lunch

Feed around 1.30

2pm out in buggy for napwalk, would sleep in buggy till around 3.30

Home for feed, cuddles, play mat whilst I did housework, or sling

Bath early evening then cluster feeding/ sleeping from around 7.30 till midnight - then to bed and repeat!

Thank you all!

Stitch - I don’t want to go to bed at 6.30, I want some grown up time with my husband.

I think I’d worry too much about her being asleep upstairs on her own, maybe once payday has been I could invest in a angel monitor with the mat. We do use a projecter light and she does watch it but gets bored very quickly. My first was a dream sleeper! So this is all new. Thank you for your advice

Mine were in routines before the Midwife signed me off tbh so can't see that 9 weeks is too young. When I had my eldest 30 years ago I went back to work when he was six weeks old and so had to have some sort of routine or I would never have managed. Subsequent babies had to fit in with work/school/family routines and so again I had no choice. It was better for me and they thrived, I'm not someone who likes to spend all day feeding and holding a baby tbh it makes me feel claustrophobic.

I agree it's too early for a routine in the purest sense, but I did begin a bedtime routine at that age - bath, feed, bed - at whatever time they seemed naturally tired (which was anything from 6.30 till 9pm as I breastfed and they'd cluster feed). It helped them distinguish night from day and then the other sleeps and feeds during the day fell into a natural pattern.

Gina Ford stressed me out. As soon as I followed ds's cues and worked around them as best I could, everything became easier. As for Velcro babies - it's possible to get on and do things with a sling, and often a sling suits reflux babies because they're kept upright. I agree that there's a 4th trimester and things often improve after the first 3 months, with the baby becoming more put-downable.