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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate going on holiday.

181 replies

TheMasterNotMargarita · 16/03/2018 03:39

First you have to decide where to go. Research flights/accommodation/vicinity to places of interest bar/beach etc. Tedious.

Then you have to pack. DH does the actual packing but I always have to organise most of it. Which is actually the best part for me, I quite like packing Grin.

Then you have to travel. If you stay in the UK you have several hours trapped in a car with your nearest and dearest. Before you spend the duration of the holiday with them every waking moment.

If you travel abroad you are in enforced close proximity to other people. And I don't really like flying.

Then you spend all your time trying to amuse your children without their toys, trying to get them to sleep in a strange place. They are hot, the food is weird, the bed smells different.....

I like warm weather. I enjoy being on holiday. I just CBA with all the effort. I'd like a Narnia style wardrobe that I could walk into and appear out the other side somewhere warm.and sunny already in my shorts and t-shirt.

DH loves a holiday. I told him to go without me. (But he can take the kids 🤣).

IANBU am I?

OP posts:
Pinkvoid · 18/03/2018 22:12

I go on city breaks so I’m not there too long, I don’t often have the warmth which is great because I hate hot weather and I find them extremely fun. I would be shit bored if I had went on a package holiday to lanzarote.

Leapfrog44 · 28/03/2018 14:04

Goodness what First World problems you struggle with!

olbndansmummy · 28/03/2018 15:18

Wow, thought we were the only weird family that don't get or do holidays! All my friends jet off here, there and everywhere but it's just not for us and we're never jealous of all the places they go. Just home birds who prefer days out and sleeping in our own beds. Yanbu cheers to all us home lovers!

Strongmummy · 28/03/2018 18:26

The food is weird?!?! Confused

Ohfuckinghellwhatnow · 28/03/2018 18:41

I do actually love the research bit, picking the right place, reading the reviews, booking it and all that bumph. I don't even mind the packing. What I just HATE is the travel to the airport, the bit about bein trapped up in the air in such close proximity to hundreds of others (taking off & landing is ace though) foreign customs (I always think they might mistake me for someone, like a drugs mule and I'll get dragged into a room with rubber gloves) and I hate all the re-packing and hauling everything back home. But while I LOVE being flopped out on a hot beach, eating my own body weight in pastries and wondering what'll be in the buffet later, the bit I hate most abot holidays is the endless worrying that my house is ok, my pets are ok, my family is ok. So I fret about it the whole time until I return, then 10 minutes after walking back through my front door when I've realised all is well, I will spend the following month crying that it went too fast & I want to go back!

Booboo66 · 28/03/2018 18:43

I love going on holiday. It’s one of my biggest priorities and any spare money is used on it. I’m a single parent so travel alone with my 2 dad who love strange food, strange beds and hot weather as do I so no issues abroad. UK holidays are a bit riskier as the weather can see you being stuck with indoor activities which we’d prefer not to be but it’s still nice to be somewhere else

Booboo66 · 28/03/2018 18:43

2 DD 😆

ForalltheSaints · 28/03/2018 18:45

I enjoy holidays, but if the OP does not, more space for others. Though I have sympathy for the comment about close proximity.

Imabadmummy · 28/03/2018 18:49

@AltheaorDonna that job would be a travel agent lol.....and whilst its fun, its not very well paid.
Used to be one and back in the days there were lots of perks that made up for the low wage but not any more.

I do miss spending hours flicking through brochures though....another thing of the past.

Teacher22 · 28/03/2018 19:53

I belong to a book group where the constant topic is the latest holiday of every member. They fly constantly to exciting, long haul destinations and do really adventurous things. It is clear they think I am a complete weed for not doing the same. I go to Devon quite a lot and sometimes to Italian cities like Venice, Rome or Florence for the culture and beauty.

Firstly, I can't afford to go on many expensive trips. I always fly on cheapie fares and hire AirBNBs or low cost apartments and try to economise when I am in the city. However, I do not like packing (I am hyper anxious and a bit OCD) nor do I relish the travelling and airport experience. It seems mad to me that on any break, even to a nearby city, it takes a day of travel there and another day back. I am not completely crazy and, because my children are grown up and do not now need looking after, I usually love the trip when I am there.

For a worrywart like me, a trip to Devon is usually just great. It takes three hours door to door. The accommodation is five star and the coast is amazing. There are things to do whatever the weather and I can pack the car with as much as I like without having to worry I have forgotten something or exceeded my weight allowance.

I think the biggest aspect of a holiday is managing expectations. I see other people expecting to have the holiday of a lifetime if they have planned thoroughly and spent a fortune but they are often let down and disappointed by the reality. My Devon trips are modest and I don't expect much weather-wise and am often delighted by small, insignificant pleasures.

kennycat · 28/03/2018 21:12

Yep I find holidays fairly pants.
We always do cottages in the uk and they’ve generally been nice but as a Sahm they are a bit of a busmans holiday (cooking, laundry etc)
I’m sure I’d love a really expensive holiday where I don’t have to do anybody of that stuff but the thought of spending soooo much money on such a short amount of time fills me with dread.
The best bit is, as previously mentioned, the coming home again. Makes me remember that I do love my home!

I feel such a miserable grouch saying I don’t like holidays but I really don’t!

OhHolyJesus · 28/03/2018 22:01

I have major travel anxiety for holidays with a child, I used to so enjoy it but now I just want to stay home where I know where everything is.
It's a control thing and I try to reduce the impact of it but YANBU.
Our last overseas holiday is this summer as we won't be able to afford it after that and I'm quite looking forward to it having UK trips only!
Last year I had two overseas holidays which ended with me getting D&V both times and being dangerously tired and dehydrated from breastfeeding throughout. Not fun.

mumof2exhausted · 28/03/2018 22:22

I do get what you are saying and if you don’t go away often it can seem stressful travelling with children. We go abroad 4/5 times a year including long haul and we love it. You just need to find the right places. Ideal is an apart-hotel. Must have separate bed rooms but has to be half board at very least, ideally all inclusive, definitely not self catering shopping for food and cooking is not a holiday! Ours are 2 and 4 so ideally kids club where you can stay and play with them or if they’re happy to leave them for a bit. Mini disco, kids friendly entertainment, few books and iPads. Sorted. Think people get way too stressed about how much stuff to bring. We went away for 3 weeks in Jen (Dubai and Maldives) and had 2 medium size cases for all of our stuff. You never need as much as you think.

BlueSkyBurningBright · 28/03/2018 22:35

I love planning the holiday, and finding somewhere that all the family will like. I do not really like going on holiday though.

I hate flying, I get air sick.

When I am on holiday I spend a lot of time stressing about the awful things than might be happening to the house back home. Burglars, pipes bursting, squatters... all sorts of dramas. I panic all the way home and am so relived when we get in the front door and see the house is ok.

My Dh and the kids think I am nuts.

SiliconHeaven · 29/03/2018 10:54

Nightmare taking small children on holiday. When you have an empty nest, cruising out of Southampton on a big boat taking me to exotic locations with as much luggage as I want and no long journey to get there. Heaven Smile

Abbylee · 29/03/2018 14:24

You sound like a wet blanket. I hope my son marries someone with more kindness and fun.

The best part of long trips is spending time with my nearest and dearest. They aren't very dear to you. It seems.

Not to mention that many of us are struggling to survive.

You sound like someone I would prefer to leave behind. I hope that you're more happy with the other aspects of your life for his sake. You seem happy to wallow in unjustified self pity. Stay home, but we are often attracted to light. Not darkness.

Biddie191 · 29/03/2018 14:38

I thought I was the only person who dreads holidays.
I like the freedom of home, able to do what I want go where I want, sleep in my bed and not the pressure to go and see everything.

kennycat · 29/03/2018 14:52

Wow abbeylee, that was a bit unnecessarily unkind!

AGreatBigPonk · 29/03/2018 15:05

I loved holidays and travelling. I now have 2 DC under three and while I adore my kids I detest holidays. DH and I have decided to bin them off until they are at least 5 before we try again.

phoenix1973 · 29/03/2018 15:06

I like holidays from the moment I swipe the keycard in my hotel room, dump the cases and grab a cocktail, followed by a good explore.

The bit before is awful. The bit after I've checked out is shit too.

pinkstripeycat · 30/03/2018 15:20

My DH is constantly looking at holidays so we always have a plan. We drive to France, Spain etc so no flying. We take some food and buy the rest from the local supermarkets so it's not strange or unusual (and no tummy probs from uncooked food). We take our own sleeping bags and pillows. We are in a caravan so can come and go as we please and it costs less than a week in Wales. During our trips we've learnt French and Spanish which makes trips more enjoyable and easier. DCs play a lot of football and swim a lot and they make lots of friends. The only downside is the packing and unpacking when we get home

RoryHatesCoffee · 30/03/2018 19:03

Because god forbid you ever try any 'strange or unusual' food Hmm

cardibach · 30/03/2018 19:10

StickyPlum I find everywhere in the world I've been is about the same as here, different weather, people speak differently, but that's about it
Seriously?
This is so unbelievable that I have to discount all of what you have said. Unless, of course, you have only ever gone to hugely touristy places attracting mostly British tourists - in which case, hav3 some imagination!
The world is amazing. You really can’t be all superior and cynical about not liking it as though it underwhelms you. It doesn’t look cool when you do this.

ZibbidooZibbidooZibbidoo · 30/03/2018 19:13

YANBU OP! The only part I like about holidays are the part where I have my eyes closed on a lounger. The best holiday ever had was one someone else planned for me as a surprise. Now if only she could have sedated me for the journey it would have been perfect Grin

Fintress · 30/03/2018 19:14

Each to their own. We absolutely love travelling. We love everything about it, researching where we are going, choosing hotels, flights, everything. We are going on a month long trip at the end of the year and are already planning and researching. We're not long back from a road trip, staying in nice hotels and enjoying stunning scenery.