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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate going on holiday.

181 replies

TheMasterNotMargarita · 16/03/2018 03:39

First you have to decide where to go. Research flights/accommodation/vicinity to places of interest bar/beach etc. Tedious.

Then you have to pack. DH does the actual packing but I always have to organise most of it. Which is actually the best part for me, I quite like packing Grin.

Then you have to travel. If you stay in the UK you have several hours trapped in a car with your nearest and dearest. Before you spend the duration of the holiday with them every waking moment.

If you travel abroad you are in enforced close proximity to other people. And I don't really like flying.

Then you spend all your time trying to amuse your children without their toys, trying to get them to sleep in a strange place. They are hot, the food is weird, the bed smells different.....

I like warm weather. I enjoy being on holiday. I just CBA with all the effort. I'd like a Narnia style wardrobe that I could walk into and appear out the other side somewhere warm.and sunny already in my shorts and t-shirt.

DH loves a holiday. I told him to go without me. (But he can take the kids 🤣).

IANBU am I?

OP posts:
MealyPotatoes · 16/03/2018 12:34

I don’t hate holidays but I do hate the pressure for them to be good because so much time and money has gone into making them happen.

I prefer impromptu, spontaneous days out when there isn’t any expectation.

I’m currently trying to find a suitable holiday for the family this summer and I’m getting a headache trying to find something that will please us all.

yucima · 16/03/2018 12:45

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HariboIsMyCrack · 16/03/2018 12:47

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Misty9 · 16/03/2018 12:53

I love holidays and have small children. My 4 year old doesn't remember the holidays from two years ago - but I'm going for me Grin that said, obviously it needs to work for all so we always stay in apartments, with washing machine and dishwasher, and spend most of our time in parks and fun museums. We went to Seville over feb half term and had a brilliant time.

Dh on the other hand... But we don't go away anywhere ridiculously hot and I think that makes a big difference to how small children and dh cope. I can't wait until they're older and I can justify the really adventurous trips!

FleurDelacoeur · 16/03/2018 13:56

ended up taking 2 cars for 3 people

That's madness. Assuming you're only there until Monday and not until August....

I understand that people get stressed out with packing and a busy airport isn't a lot of fun. But that's such a small part of being on holiday, and the end destination is SO worth it. There are holidays for all preferences, if you don't want to go to Spain and lie by a pool for two weeks then don't! Go interrailing, or cruising, or camping in Austria, or to a B&B in Devon. Just use your imagination.

We're doing a combination of holidays this year - we have a week self-catering in the UK in July, and we're going to the Canaries for a week in October. DH and I are also having a couple of days on a city break without the kids.

It's so true that travel broadens the mind and lets you experience something a bit different. Doing the same thing day in and day out and being too stressed/worried/boring to ever leave home only for a weekend is a miserable existence.

Tainbri · 16/03/2018 14:04

DH hates holidays. He says he has everything he wants at home, doesn't want to part with money (and boy does he go off the deep end with how much everything costs!) doesn't want to queue and generally hates travelling. He also hates the heat. Zero positives about leaving the house. So I take DC on my own and have done for years now. DH and I haven't been away together for 20 years and that was our honeymoon which he's moaned about ever since!!

YourVagesty · 16/03/2018 14:27

YADBU you massive weirdo Grin

But I'd probably feel the same if I had to factor children into my travel plans

Sophisticatedsarcasm · 16/03/2018 14:28

I’ve been to many places when I was younger with my Nan and other family members as my mum doesn’t travel.
I’ve been to Florida, Ireland, France, Portugal and Cyprus. I’d love to take my kids but will have to wait till they are a lot older because I wouldn’t want to take both by myself at this age.

RoryAndLogan · 16/03/2018 16:43

@Teateaandmoretea I've seen a lot of the UK and will be showing my kids all of it too, but I don't see that as a holiday in the sense that I would just visit places in the uk and not take my kids to experience new cultures and languages.

Teateaandmoretea · 16/03/2018 17:25

I think there are different cultures in the UK. Have you been to many of the Scottish islands for example?

I agree with you that if you only holidayed in the UK you miss out. And as you say you are well traveled in the UK but most people aren't I think. But they've been to OZ ......

My SIL they literally go abroad to a baking hot resort each year but their kids have never been North of Nottingham or to Cornwall or Wales, really odd I think. But each to his or her own....!

Hoardinghobbit · 16/03/2018 17:40

Some miserable types on here. Holidays are enhanced by children (unless you transfer your stress to them). Tired, satisfied children sleep anywhere, can't understand all this 'out of their routine' nonsense- that's part of the point! If you're miserable on vacation with your family, the fault is not, I suspect, with the holiday.

BarbaraofSevillle · 16/03/2018 17:40

I'd love to holiday in the UK more but I'm a fair weather outdoorsy person and one thing that's guaranteed to have it pissing with rain for a week is me going on a camping or hiking trip.

We do have lots of days out walking, coast etc and the odd UK weekend away, but holidays are abroad for guaranteed sun for us. Not necessarily that much more expensive either. I went on a UK diving trip that cost more than a lot of our European trips.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 16/03/2018 21:34

YUNBU!

My best holiday would be for everyone else to go away for a fortnight and leave me with the telly and the gin .

SchadenfreudePersonified · 16/03/2018 21:35

*YANBU, not YUNBU

moonmaker · 16/03/2018 22:20

So we seem to have reached the conclusion from this thread that holidays are great until you have kids and from then on are absolute hell! Currently trying for a baby so will make sure to get maximum enjoyment out of the holidays we have planned this year!

I can't relate to this , sorry ! And I have three dc and have been flying with them several times a year since they were born - both long haul and short haul , including a US road trip , ferrying from Europe to Africa ( they were 1 and 3), city breaks , beach holidays , villa etc so a real range . It's been brilliant every time .

Johnnycomelately1 · 17/03/2018 03:06

I like ski trips best. Mornings are a bit hectic but then the kids are off in ski school, you get to do what you want to do, and then meet up late afternoon for swimming/dinner etc.

CaptainCardamom · 17/03/2018 10:10

Hmm, I don't think I've been miserable on holiday with the kids - it's more that it's just not relaxing. We have fun and have had some great holidays, but it's not an actual break like it was pre-DC. A break would mean being able to relax, read, swim, mooch around ruins etc without having to be on constant guard for the kids injuring themselves, getting lost, squabbling or whatever.

(Having said that my ex was a lazy/incompetent arse and the responsibility was almost always with me, so I wasn't getting the ideal situation)

Oblomov18 · 17/03/2018 10:29

I find it hard work preparing To go. Washing all the ds's favourite clothes that they want to wear now. Packing.
Coming home and washing it all and putting it away.
What a faff!

Thursdaydreaming · 17/03/2018 10:45

Love holidays and travelling, but I can see with dc it would be a pain. Currently pregnant so I'm putting travel on hold for now.

The80sweregreat · 17/03/2018 10:48

I hear you! Easier to have a ‘staycation’ sometimes!

TheSconeOfStone · 17/03/2018 11:21

I love our family holidays but we do what works for us rather than a two week med holiday. My family aren’t keen on being too hot and priorities for the kids are other children and space. We camp which isn’t everyone’s cup of tea but we’re not prepared to spend 1,000s on AI (we would need separate room for kids pushing the cost up). We go somewhere with a good pool complex near interesting towns and museums so we get a bit of culture as well. We love theme parks as well. I love planning our holidays and don’t find it a chore. DH packs and does the cooking. Kids wash up. It was hard when they were tiny but now at 10 and 7 really easy.

Juanbablo · 17/03/2018 11:21

Planning for a holiday is part of the fun for me. We've been packing this morning and will be shopping this afternoon for a few more things that we need. It's fun to me but I guess it's not for everyone. We didn't go on holiday last year and it was a really hard year (not because we didn't have a holiday, because of other stuff) so it feels great to have something to look forward to. No doubt I will be looking forward to my own bed by the end of the holiday though.

HRTpatch · 17/03/2018 11:24

I love planning holudays. Mainly because its just the 2 of us....no miserable ex or children to look after.

SpringNowPlease2018 · 17/03/2018 12:04

I don't have kids

a word in defence of people saying "places are all the same" - it often feels to me that you can go anywhere and it's all screaming babies!

a couple of posters mentioned anxiety - I have been hospitalised on holiday and that's grim too.

I think the rest of my holidays will be the Lake District during school terms. I live in London (well outskirts) and that's more than enough city and busy for me!

CompleteAisling · 17/03/2018 12:14

So we seem to have reached the conclusion from this thread that holidays are great until you have kids and from then on are absolute hell!

Only the miserable dry shites. It's pretty sad that people think that holiday with their own kids is hellish.