TA being attacked daily by Reception child - speak up or not?

[FizzyCherry]

I have to be careful not to be too identifying but I am a Reception TA. We have a new child in the class who is already on his third school since September.
He is too young for any kind of formal assessment (apparently) but we have other children with similar statements so not sure about that.
Every single day he is punching, kicking and biting adults and children, completely unprompted. For example, he will be sitting looking at a book, unprompted he will throw it at another child and hit them or kick out. Or he kicks adults as they walk past.
He obviously has lots of problems so it’s not his fault per se, but we have been told to manage it by taking him out to the playground or by giving him extra stickers.
My concern is that if he injures an adult while alone with them, it won’t be properly dealt with.
Now the other children are starting to ask why they can’t get the same rewards.
Plus, the majority of time is spent with him, meaning the rest of the class miss out on the attention I am paid to give them.
He is 99% likely to be diagnosed with something on the spectrum in time, which then allows extra help to be put in place but in the meantime, would I BU to demand more is done?
To do so would involve essentially questioning the judgement of both the SENCO and the head, who are both far more qualified in these things than me. And, remember, he’s FOUR. And I’m an adult.
Just for context, this is a mainstream primary school where I’ve worked 12 years, not a special school where this is more expected.
I have had naughty children before but never on such a constant and excessive scale.
Or would you just let it go, put it down to an occupational hazard, knowing he will soon either be moving to another class or possibly excluded?
I am debating walking out if something isn’t done, but the head is V unsupportive and I think she will say that’s fine, we’ll get someone else.
Other adults have complained about the situation but he’s not in their class so it’s seen as “my” issue to deal with.
WWYD?
I love my job and the school, I don’t want to leave but if I threaten to, it will probably mean that I have to.

I've name changed for this. I worked 1:1 with a child like this. We were usually out of the classroom as he wouldn't go in which was so isolating for me. The HT and senco didn't care about what I had to deal with as the problem was contained. I ended up getting signed off for a week as my BP was sky high and I couldn't sleep. I have a lot of experience and this was unheard of for me. The HT and SENCO were unsympathetic and blabbed my personal information around the school. I lasted a further year then I quit. Judging from the frequent job ads they haven't found anyone who's lasted.
You have rights as an employee. Be assertive about this: I regret letting my sympathy for the child cloud my judgement.

I think you need to have a frank chat about your feelings with the class teacher and the Senco to agree strategies.
Has the child actually been observed by the Senco?
From what you've described it does not appear that the school is taking the situation seriously; the child must be finding school to be a very challenging environment.
I can't imagine that any of the other children's parents would be very happy about their children being hurt.
Are you a member of a Union who might be able to offer support if you haven't a line manager at school who can help?
At the end of the day though,it is the class teacher who should be responsible for dealing with the child.

This is a ridiculous situation. You clearly aren’t trained to work with his level of need and no-one seems to be putting any support in place (it doesn’t necessarily cost money).

Are you filing in ABC forms? If not you need to ask the SLT who is responsible for them. With ABC’s you have at least some chance of working out what the triggers are and doing something about them. I’d expect that at the very least.

Taking him out of the classroom is unlikely to settle his behaviour (it will become a means to escape demands so could increase them if he is wanting to escape). Stickers may help if he likes stickers - if he isn’t fussed by them they’ll have no effect.

It sounds as if no-one in the school knows what they’re doing so you may not get much help from the SLT. Is there a behaviour team that can be accessed? Often there’s a different team for non-dx’d children. He needs people in who understand this level of behaviour and can train you in the tools needed.

The behaviour team come in from outside - so specialists

Of course the TA is not going to discuss another child with other parents but if incidents are happening where children are being hurt the parents will need to be informed and it won’t be long before parents work out which child it is. The more they complain, the more likely it is that something will be done.

Just go off sick with stress. Or file for constructive dismissal. You shouldn’t be going into work expecting to be physically abused!

DS is 4, tomorrow we attend a meeting at the child development center to end the assessment process so we can apply for an ECHP. It can be done and you should encourage the parents to take it further.

It’s not physical abuse - it’s a distressed child. And there are jobs where being at the physical end of someone else’s distress is a reasonable expectation (they’re often low paid as well - TA’s are the higher end of the scale tbh - still not enough).

The key for this sort of role to be enjoyable (& it can be incredibly rewarding to work with someone who is distressed and see the changes when appropriate support is put in place) is a) good, skilled support from management and professionals who know what they’re doing and b) good quality training.

The OP has neither.

"You shouldn’t be going into work expecting to be physically abused!"

There are some jobs where there will physical distressed behaviour although if the person has the right support ( including environment) it should not happen very often. The problem here is that the child isn't being given the right support.
Those in more senior positions in the school should be doing more than this.

The argument about distressed child is not relevant to H&S at work. IMHO. A person has the right to go to work and not be physically attacked. It's up to the authorities to make a provision for this child and at the same time ensure the safety and wellbeing of the people who work with him.

Sorry but it is physical abuse. Who the perpetrator is doesn't change the end result of someone being punched, hit, kicked, spat on. It's physical abuse whether a care worker is assaulted in a nursing home by a man with dementia who doesn't have control of his actions and when it's a TA in a school working one on one with a child who is violent and aggressive.

Obviously I don't know anything about this situation but it also strikes me as unhelpful to the child to be able to have an adult he can attack on a daily basis without serious repercussions. I know non NT kids don't act or learn exactly the same as NT children do but most children learn from the outcomes of their behaviours and I wonder what it's teaching this child that he has his own walking punchbag each day who has to keep coming back for more. I full accept I don't know enough about or have any experience in this area but it's a thought that sprung to mind.

And he's not just attaching OP, he's attacking other kids too. If he's able to assault other children and his support worker and nothing is being done then it's a very dangerous and unfair situation to everyone involved. If I had a child in his class and he laid a finger on him/her I wouldn't be stopping until I knew exactly how the school were going to prevent this from happening again to somebody else.

I don't think people are thinking about the impact of a small child knowing that every day when they go to school they may be kicked, bitten or punched or witness it happening to a friend of theirs. I read a post on here months ago about a parent of a little girl who had a similar child in her class and how she was afraid to go to school, having tummy ache and the runs through anxiety every morning, and became a withdrawn shell of herself, it was so sad. No way would I be sending my child to school without a robust effective plan to keep everyone safe even if that meant the child only being safe to learn in isolation.

As an adult who amongst us would be happy going to work each day knowing there's a fair chance one of our coworkers would attack us? And that we have no choice but to stay in the job? There are more people here to consider than just this individual child.

I thought it was not the done thing to describe a child with SEN as ‘naughty’. Bit surprised at that language from a TA.

OP said he hasn't actually got a statement of SEN yet, so it's pure conjecture to talk as if he does have SEN. Certainly readers of a thread don't have enough info to be able to assess for SEN via one person's account

Kids with SEN can be naughty too!

I’m a TA in a mainstream school we had a child similar to this in year 1. He clearly found the whole school experience traumatic and attacked staff and pupils several times every day. It was exhausting emotionally and physically for him and us.
Make sure your HT knows every single incident and record all of them. Our boy was put on a shorter day ( he went home at lunchtime) this helped him manage school and we gradually built him up to full days.
I feel sorry for you, unless you’ve been in this situation you have no idea how stressful it is and people saying it isn’t his fault are very unhelpful!

My son was diagnosed with autism and learning disabilities at three and a half he had an EHCP in place from four and has always attended a special school in my town we have two special needs primary schools and two special needs high schools there is also an outreach team that comes onto mainstream schools to assess children that are thought to have additional needs I guess we are lucky.?

“OP said he hasn't actually got a statement of SEN yet, so it's pure conjecture to talk as if he does have SEN.”

It isn’t and professionals talk in terms of “traits” and “suspected” and “presenting” YEARS before a statement is done. That’s right, the current wait around here is about 18-24 months or 2 years.

I thought it was not the done thing to describe a child with SEN as ‘naughty’. Bit surprised at that language from a TA.

OP said they had had naughty children before but had never dealt with anything like this, we have no idea if the the 'naughty children' mentioned have SEN or not.

It’s really not physical assault if the person does not have capacity (young child or adult with learning disabilities) - and you get far further with dealing appropriately with it if people recognise it for what it is - distressed behaviours.

I am on the receiving end of physical behaviours a lot. I don’t count any of it as physical assault - because it isn’t. These are people who have lost control due to anxiety and distress. I also teach courses for families on the receiving end of physically distressed behaviours - generally from fairly large people. People tend to get hurt a lot less once they recognise that someone is distressed as their responses become less likely to escalate situations.

This is a very young child. Whether he will end up diagnosed or not isn’t that relevant -he currently sounds a very distressed little boy who isn’t coping with school. He needs people around him who know what they are doing (& yes I know that costs money no-one wants to spend - but that’s not his fault). He is currently being failed - as is the OP. I agree with recording every incident - preferably with an ABC. Evidence up to the eyeballs is needed to get funding for anything and if it isn’t written down it didn’t happen.

Hi, thanks for comments.

Just a quick update. When I said I have dealt with naughty children, I meant I have dealt with kids who have no SEN, and are just very badly behaved. Some have underlying issues, some are just badly parented. They are generally hardest to deal with because the parents don’t support anything put into place in school etc.
His behaviour exceeds any I have dealt with before, and he is aware when other children make wrong decisions, because he tells them they are doing so, so there is an awareness of right and wrong.

I wasn’t saying this child is naughty, as such, but as a PP said, we still don’t know why he behaves the way he does and it’s just as inappropriate to label him as SEN before an expert has done so.

I spoke to the head and the SENCO, outside help is being brought in more quickly than originally planned, it’s a fast track thing, apparently.
It did help, ironically. that he hit out at another child just as the deputy head was passing, so he saw for himself what goes on.

We are also trying various tactics to try and keep him and the others safe, which worked today, mostly till he tried to throw a bench at me because I told him it was hometime.

He’s definitely work in progress, but I am feeling a bit more confident that he might be able to be calmed with the right support.

That is obviously the big issue, but I have put my case forward higher up now, so waiting to see what happens next.

Being able to comment on other children's behaviour doesn't indicate that he has any awareness of his own behaviour nor any strategies or ability to manage it. Your posts show a real ignorance of this child's needs tbh and until you get the support and training needed you will continue to mismanage this child and you and others will continue to be hurt.

What's his home life like?

Just struck me that he lashed out when it was time to go back home.

limon it's more likely that the child has difficulty with transitions rather than him having a bad home life. Had there been warnings,maybe a visual timetable and an established predictable and safe routine in place rather than him just being told it was home time then he would probably not have become stressed and tried to throw a bench.
My own ds was non verbal but his school had a routine for all transitions. For ds it started with a particular piece of music which was his warning that routines for end of day were starting. Simple and effective.

If the child has not got a statement of SEN yet, I'm not surprised that the OP would show 'a real ignorance of the child's needs'.

Bit harsh given the circumstances.

I agree with flesh. I immediately thought ‘transitions’ (& tbh it doesn’t matter whether he has SN or not, if someone has problems with transitions the same techniques work. It’s not unusual for a young child to have problems with transitions - heck I still have to use strategies with my NT 13 year old at bed time & various other transitions if I want to avoid a strop).

We had similar in my youngest son’s class in infants. There were so many occasions where my son or another child or the teacher was belted by one particular child - and it was ALWAYS at a transition (eg my son was bashed because ‘it was end of playtime and I was just trying to help by picking up the toys’ another one was kicked because ‘we were just waiting to move classrooms’.

I ended up saying ‘fgs will someone please give that poor child sone sort of visual countdown timer or strip or visual timetable’ - it would honestly have solved so many issues. Cheap, quick and easy to make.

He was eventually diagnosed in about year 3 or 4. Not sure that led to much in the way of sensible support though. But at least other parents stopped grumbling about him quite so much.