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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how many people have asked for a cesarean out of preference?

457 replies

VioletteValentia · 12/03/2018 07:36

I did it. I’ve never met another person who has, or who has admitted to it. I have come across people who seem convinced that supporting maternal choice would lead to everyone asking for cesareans, which I think is bullshit. Not everyone wants one!

Did you do this? Would you? Would you be more likely to if you felt the option was equally acceptable?

I’m interested in how many women feel like I did.

I shouldn’t have to say this but...no “natural v cesarean” insulting please.

OP posts:
minifingerz · 12/03/2018 22:56

Good post sunshinestorm.

Discussion and support is 100% the way to go.

Beetlejizz · 12/03/2018 22:57

But that is just the sort of thing you do need an answer to, or at least some working out, before making blanket, black and white statements like you did.

minifingerz · 12/03/2018 22:58

Beetlejizz, there is a real shortage of obstetricians in the NHS.

More surgery - much more surgery - requires more surgeons surely?

Unless you think NHS obstetricians are currently under occupied?

minifingerz · 12/03/2018 23:01

“But that is just the sort of thing you do need an answer to, or at least some working out, before making blanket, black and white statements like you did”

Stating that maternal choice of mode of birth must be prioritised regardless of pressure on resources is also making assumptions no?

DustyCropHopper · 12/03/2018 23:11

I had an emergency c section after a failed induction at 37 weeks due to obstetric coliastasis (sp?) with ds1. When he was born he was rather big for dates and had the head circumference of the average 6 week old and it was suggested that the reason I had not dilated was because his head was too large to fit on the cervix and had I lrogressed he almost certainly would have got stuck and we would both be in danger. I felt out of control and felt a failure etc. So with ds2 I requested a ELCS as I felt I was then in control. Turned out to be the right decision, his head was bigger than ds1! With dd we went with ELCS anyway but the dr I saw with her said had it been my second baby she would have been reluctant and pushed for a vbac. I think that would have caused me unnecessary stress and fear TBH! Glad I had a more understanding dr!

Dinosauratemydaffodils · 12/03/2018 23:19

@nowater34 Ouch. I think I got very lucky in terms of emcs recovery. I had a long back to back labour which felt like gremlins were hacking my spine and sciatic nerves apart with lots of little hatchets for 75 hours. Got into theatre for an attempt at forceps and the drugs were wonderful. By the time forceps failed, couldn't feel a thing and never really had any pain afterwards at all. Was up and dressed including tights on my own 5 hours post emcs, walking the length of the hospital to nicu and back via stairs within 24 hours.

I actually asked for a maternal choice section due to sexual assault but was so put off by the midwives I didn't pursue it. It's one of my biggest regrets, ds got stuck anyway, they left me with broken waters so long he ended up in NICU and I was hallucinating on the operating table. This time the consultant asked me what I wanted, I said elective, she said fine and I absolutely think it's the best option for me and the baby.

tenbob · 12/03/2018 23:24

More surgery - much more surgery - requires more surgeons surely?

But obstetrics isn't just surgery
It is also medical - antenatal clinics, complicated vaginal deliveries, and if the consultant also does gynae, seeing postpartum women with birth injuries

But an obstetrician could have delivered 3 or more babies by ELCS in the time it took to deliver my sister's one baby. So by that logic, it would be a far better use of NHS consultants time to have a ELCS production line than 'waste' all their time on complicated vaginal births that end in forceps or EMCS

Granted, I'm not sure how many doctors go into obstetrics to work on an ELCS production line though...

elliejjtiny · 12/03/2018 23:28

I'm envious of the women on this thread who had easy recoveries after c-sections. I've done VB with no pain relief and back to back VB with just gas and air so I thought my pain threshold was quite good. But with my c-sections including the semi elective one I was still on morphine and crying with the pain on day 4.

NotASingleFuckToGive · 12/03/2018 23:40

I had a cesarean with DS1 for MH reasons- following premature stillbirth the year before I was absolutely terrified of giving birth vaginally in the same hospital. My consultant was absolutely lovely, and she and the midwives I saw understood and accepted my request to have one.
VBAC with my next two DC.

Blueskyrain · 13/03/2018 00:08

I chose one on the basis of phobia of childbirth, and I have not regretted my choice for a second. Afterwards I remember sitting waiting for it to become painful, but it never really did.

MsHopey · 13/03/2018 05:21

I chose to and got it approved no problem. I was petrified of child birth and it took me years to finally have a baby with my husband because the thought of something coming out my vagina filled me with horror.
But people are very opinionated on the matter. And most opinions are pretty bad and all the "too posh to push" stereotypes, so it's not something I openly discuss with many people. I also twisted the truth with everyone but my husband, that my baby was showing up massive (he was) and that's why they thought a c section would be a good idea (They never advised that, I did).
It was absolutely the right decision for me. And I do agree that it takes money out the NHS, but I'm quite healthy and have never been to the hospital for anything else and very rarely need anything from the doctors.
It seems selfish, but I did what was in mine and my babies best interests.

TriJo · 13/03/2018 06:33

If I ever have a DC3 (unlikely) I'll be asking for an ELCS. I've had 2 vaginal births already but DS2's birth was very traumatic and I've no real wish to repeat that.

nowater34 · 13/03/2018 06:41

elliejjtiny It’s weird isn’t it. I had back to back labour with my first but no bloody pain relief as it happened so quickly & the pain was immense.

I think my expectations were too high for CS & I naively thought I would be moving freely after. I guess it’s a very different pain. Did you ask for the morphine? I was suprised when they handed me paracetamol & bid me fair well 😁

My good friend is a surgeon & she popped in to visit me & thought I was doing really well & told me what I was feeling was normal. She’s had a VB & ELCS (breech) too. Oh yes she recommended peppermint water/tea to reduce trapped wind. Seemed to work for me.

MsHopey · 13/03/2018 07:15

I was shocked when 24 hours after cutting open so many different layers of me they have me paracetamol and sent me away. Took me 45 minutes just to get to the entrance of the hospital.
It's the only major operation I've ever heard of with such a short hospital stay and no real pain relief.

Original poster
VioletteValentia · 13/03/2018 07:17

I stayed in hospital for a week after mine, but that was due to my dc needing extra care. I would’ve gone home after 2 days.

OP posts:
whatthefuckingfuck · 13/03/2018 07:24

Haven't read the whole thread but just posting to say I asked for a cs with my dd (now 10mo) because I'd never wanted a vaginal birth. The thought of it was just horrendous and terrified me. I had to have about 3 meetings with 3 different consultants but they gave me one. I was home within 24 hours which I was glad about as I hated the hospital ward!

CookPassBabtridge · 13/03/2018 07:37

I must admit the painkillers they gave for my second were rubbish.. paracetamol and ibuprofen! Luckily I'd bought a lot of diflocenac in preparation. I was given that for my first and it worked a treat.

Original poster
VioletteValentia · 13/03/2018 07:58

I had tramadol for the first two days. Surprised you only had paracetamol.

OP posts:
MsHopey · 13/03/2018 08:18

Once the epidural wore off I was allowed one syringe of liquid morphine.
Then after that just paracetamol.
It was painful. Hard standing up off the toilet without any where to really pull myself up from.
All worth it though.
I was the last one to leave out the 4 of the c sections in the ward the day I was there. The other 3 left less than 24 hours from being admitted!

nowater34 · 13/03/2018 08:26

Yes I didn’t get anything else which suprised me as after my appendicitis I was on a morphine drip for 2/3 days. They said I could have morphine if it was really bad but as I was bf I didn’t & I wasn’t sure what “really bad” was.

Original poster
VioletteValentia · 13/03/2018 08:31

I’m really surprised at the pain relief options, or lack of that some of you had. I had morphine for the first day (four doses) but it didn’t work for me so then I had tramadol.

I did have one person try to deny me pain relief, but I put in a formal complaint and received a written apology.

This seems to vary massively by which hospital you go to, which is awful.

OP posts:
nowater34 · 13/03/2018 08:34

Perhaps that’s why some find it more painful than others!

violette did you find you needed the morphine & tramodol?

nowater34 · 13/03/2018 08:34

Bloody cost cutting m!

Original poster
VioletteValentia · 13/03/2018 08:41

For the first day I needed something. I still wouldn’t say it was the worst pain, but I needed painkillers. The problem I had was within 10 minutes, the morphine wore off. The consultant told me to buzz whenever I needed pain relief and this one woman treated me like some sort of drug addict because I was saying I could still feel pain. A different nurse realised quickly I wasn’t responding, switched me to tramadol and I felt no pain at all. By day 3, just paracetamol was fine and by day 5 I didn’t need anything.

My mum is a nurse who works in theatre, and she told me that patients who control the pain recover faster. So I wonder if me having pain relief for the first few days could be why I recovered quickly and felt normal, whereas some women have said they were in pain for weeks.

OP posts:
AaronPurrSir · 13/03/2018 08:47

Those of you saying it depends on your hospital/trust as to whether you’ll be allowed one, does anyone know where you can find out what your hospital’s policy is?