To think my BIL is the most selfish man ever?

[QuestionableMouse]

Sis has a toddler and is pregnant with twins. She's had a bit of a rough pregnancy with her back and hips. I've just had her on the phone in tears because BIL hasn't even bothered to get a card from their little boy for her for Mothers day. He didn't even bother to make her a cuppa this morning before she went to work. (for context, he does three shifts a week while she does five of six).

I know he has form for this so text him on Thursday reminding him Mothers day was coming. He's now gone out with his mates and won't be back until after tea time...

I feel so bad for her that I'm considering buying a card and some flowers myself for her.

Bagged=nagged

You sound like a great sister OP

per Lashilicious:
*I was using loveeric’s phrase as you both well know. I didn’t pick it out of thin air. I’m talking about all of us speaking up generally on behalf of others. It’s not that hard to understand the concept.

Being obtuse on purpose does not help solve anything and is used as a bullying technique.*

I have no difficulty understanding concepts.
Nor are my comments are not bullying or obtuse.

I haven't seen anyone defending a selfish man on this thread. OP's sister doesn't appear to be very happy in her marriage. She needs to deal with that. Focusing on issues such as a lack of card, flowers or cup of tea for Mother's Day is focusing on entirely the wrong issue, albeit that they may be symptomatic of the wider issue. I (and lots of others) don't believe the OP is acting appropriately by reminding her BIL to buy gifts, and it is interfering in their relationship to a controlling degree. To say that that is defending a selfish man would suggest you are conflating the concepts. HTH