To ask why people have such a hard time spelling names correctly

[emberflames]

So my name is Bryony. the 2 most common ways to spell it are my way or Briony. I have my full name in my email address and of course always sign off with it but after 34 years it still amazes me how many people will respond with "hi Byrony/Bryany/bryoni" etc etc. I mean my name is right THERE on the email- twice !

My mum also has a name that can be spelt two ways and she constantly receives emails with it spelt wrong. Even some of her friends she's known for years don't get it right.

Another example is a Latvian lady I work with named Liisa. Of course we would naturally be inclined to spell it Lisa, but that's not her name. After 8 years of her working for the company so many people still get it wrong.

I really don't understand how this happens. I can understand a typo but when it happens over and over again I struggle to see how just looking at how the email was signed off or the name in the email is so difficult.

And I feel awful for my brother as we have a surname that's also a first name , and his first name can also be a surname. So he's constantly getting called by his surname. I know in the grand scheme of things it's a minor issue but it's just befuddling to me.

I started a thread about this a while back. I have a foreign friend ( her English is excellent). She persists in spelling DD’s name wrong, even though I have pointed out numerous times in texts & e mails that what she writes is a totally different name. I have put DD’s name in capitals. Nothing makes any difference & actually it really pees me off! I just don’t get it!

I have a French name and I'd say people get it wrong about 95% of the time. When they get it right I have a little happiness jig, especially if they have made the effort of putting the correct accent on the correct letter.

I went to school with an Aaron pronounced Arron. I think in the US it’s always pronounced Air-on though.

A friend’s son is called Connor. I have to check every time how to spell it.

Disclaimer: It may actually be Conor or Conner. I have no idea.

DD's name is very traditional, but does have a few rarer spelling variations. I wanted to choose one of the less well used variations, but didn't as I thought she would spend her life correcting people. So I gave her the most common one. Wish I hadn't as probably 90% of people spell it wrong anyway. Baffling.

My friends ds name is biblical.

She is Irish Catholic. Her Dh is protestant.

When her ds was born her dh's auntie sent a card with Ds name spelled "the Irish way" as surely friend would spell it the irish way........ so there's an Irish way to spell Noah.....and apparently it's Nóagh

The child is a teenager now and still cards arrive to friend, dh & Nóagh.

My name can be spelt in three different ways except in Starbucks when despite spelling it slowly and clearly for them, they once wrote my name down as Santa.

Loonyluna16 I think it's a regional thing with Aaron. I'm from the south and went to school with and worked with Aarons. All have pn it Ah-ron.
I thought the Air-ron was a scottish pn.

Ah-ron/arron I mean.

Don’t be offended if people can’t spell.

I’m dyslexic and names are really hard - exotic names especially as I am not used to the word shape. It’s awful. But it isn’t lack of care. I really can’t see the different letters for the x many ways to spell, e.g, Alistair.

My first name only has one official spelling but people have spelled it in several different ways. I think it’s because the vowel is interchangeable with another vowel “u and oo”.

My maiden name starts with a vowel that isn’t normally seen at the start of a name and because of that I would often get a constatant tagged on the front of it even if I had spelled it for someone, almost like their brain filled in the perceived gap.

Actually my married name also starts with a vowel and nobody ever knows how to pronounce it.

Never bothered me that much though, spelling is a bitch and names are a spelling landmine.

My name has multiple ways to spell it, it can have a different first letter and last letter too so I often have to spell it out to people. All variations are in baby name books etc as they have been used for centuries.
But my uncle nearly 40 years later cannot seem to spell it correctly. Even though I was named after my nana - his mum !

Both DD’s have short easy to spell names that until recently only had one way of spelling them . But with the trend to have a unique spelling of names they have sometimes been spelled wrongly by others.

The most irritating thing is when you correct people and they’re still adamant they’re right, as if you’re lying about your own name!

My DP has an extremely common name for which there are two spellings, his the lesser common. My DM will see a text from me spelling his name correctly yet still reply spelling it the other way, as if she thinks I’m doing it wrong! Very frustrating.

DP name is Aaron ( pronounced ae-ron) he is consanatly called Arron which is a completely different name.

I hve taught countless boys called Aaron over the years and every single one has been an Arron. I have never met a single person whose name has been pronounced Air-on! I assumed it was a Scottish thing.

There are 2 ways of spelling DS name. My cousin CONSTANTLY spells it the wrong way, despite me having mentioning his name on text messages, so it’s not like she’s never seen it written down. It’s so frustrating and just downright ignorant!

I feel your pain. It doesn't happen too often with my first name, but it does sometimes - there are several ways of spelling it but mine is overwhelmingly the most popular. It doesn't happen often enough to have irritated me, though.
My surname oh the other hand...
It's 4 letters long. 4 letters. When pronounced, it sounds a lot like a common english word so I'd completely understand if people spelled it that way. They don't, they just add a random e in it. It changes the pronunciation completely. I just don't understand at all but it happens so much I've taken to automatically spelling out my surname whenever I tell anyone it but that hardly helps, people still spell it wrong, when I've literally just spelled it out to them. I've had people 'correct' the spelling when I have written it down, as if they think I can't spell my own name. I remember in school my drama teacher copy pasted all our names off the register and then he WENT IN AND CHANGED MINE. WHY?!
If I ever get married, I'm changing my surname and I hope it's as long and complicated as possible cause then at least people won't think they know better than me how to spell it.

isittheholidaysyet maybe she's being passive-aggressive about it.

Did you 'steal her name' so she's trying to make a difference between your DS and hers by changing the spelling?

I'm only partly joking.

My name is along the lines of Holly. I often get Hollie, sometimes Holli, and one really annoying person who insists on Haley. And this is from people I'm related to or people who can see my name written down in front of them.

DS's name has some shorter versions but if you say the full thing it's only one spelling. I'll use Joshua as an example. People often seem to just muddle it up a bit and he gets no end of birthday cards with Johsua written in them and one person at school who calls him James no matter how often she's reminded that's not his name.

@gameofposys @appuskidu not Scottish at all it's Hebrew and how it should be said. As @thecraftyfox said it's a biblical name and that's how it should be pronounced. If the name is pronounced Arran/Arron like the island it should be pronounced so. I know a few people who spell it the Hebrew way and pronounce it the wrong way because they don't like the spelling of Arran/Arron. Its unusual for people to actually pronounce it correctly. As I said my Dp has had the name for 24 years and people ALWAYS try to tell him he's wrong. I think he knows how to say his own name properly.

I'm not sure about the 'should' be pronounced thing for Aaron. Names like other words change as they are used in different places with different accents over time. It may have been historically pronounced only one way in Hebrew speaking places but overtime (especially in countries with different languages) and phonetic ranges it has developed different pronunciations?

Ds1 has a name that has a 'Welsh way', 'Irish way' and a few 'English ways' of spelling it. We are Welsh but use the Irish way. My dad spells it as one of the lesser known English ways. 18 years of cards, text etc you would think he knows how to spell it- nope.

Ds2 has a name that also has several ways of spelling it. Yep, once again dad always misspells it.

The boys were used to asking from about the age of 3- 'why is my name wrong' 🤷🏻‍♀️ Past careing now!

I have a flower name that I ends in a Y. People constantly spell it with -IE at the end. The flower is spelled with a Y, so why would you assume that my name ends in -IE?!

My name is constantly mispelt. Does not bother me in the least. It's just some letters

I have a nine letter name that I shorten to a three letter name. I’ve never been known ever as my nine letter name at work yet it blows my mind how many clients email me and just change my name to something else similar (think Robin instead of Rob etc.) - it’s so bloody rude and arrogant, because it’s not even a typo, they blatantly haven’t bothered to check my name. And it’s only THREE LETTERS.

Out of interest I know several Aaron's (age range 6- 93/94) and they all pronounce it Arron. Is it a regional/country pronounciation thing?

I'm female. There are two versions of my name, one female, one male. I get called the male version at least once a week without fail confused
Think danielle/Daniel, Samuel/Samantha*

I have a similar name. When I had my tonsils out, they'd booked me a bed on the male surgical ward!

I only use the short form now, it saves confusion.

I could already write my name when I started school. The first day of school, we were all given big versions of our names to trace. Mine was spelt the male way, and the teacher refused to accept that I knew how my name was spelt. When my mum came to pick me up, I was livid and announced that I wasn't going to school any more because the teacher was too stupid to even spell my name right. Ma came in with me the next day and put her right.

I think my issues with authority figures started that day.

I am another one who doesn’t think there is just one correct pronunciation of Aaron (air on) and the rest are wrong.

Just a quick glance at Wikipedia says

In its original Hebrew, Aharon (אהרן) is pronounced as three syllables, a-ha-ron. This Hebrew pronunciation is still used in modern Hebrew in Israel today.

So it’s already changed from that and it was then anglicised in the 17th century. Names evolve.

I would always assume Aaron is pronounced Arron unless the person tells me that’s not how they’re say personally say it.