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Original poster

Cannot escape poverty, what's the cheapest place in the world for me to move to?

367 replies

despair1234 · 06/03/2018 15:36

I can't cope and getting depressed again. I can't earn enough money. Had a real go with lots of tries at being freelance, because my health problems make it extremely hard to keep a normal job. Time off for hospital appointments etc.

I'm on my own in the UK and just done. I have a partner is another country but don't have a visa.

Need to move somewhere it's really cheap to have housing and food, I can't cope here anymore. Everyday is a massive struggle worrying how to pay the bills once my savings totally run out. No money is coming in. Not entitled to any benefits apart from Jobseeker's Allowance maybe which I don't bother with because I can't stand the effect it has on my mental health.

I just can't cope. It's too expensive just being alive. I have no family I can go to stay with, there is literally nowhere to go to relax.

It's like being in a nightmare except I never wake up. Constant, constant stress of money I can never overcome. Yeah I can borrow money but have no way of paying it back if I can't earn.

Where can I go??? Where can I find somewhere to rest???? I need to calm down and can't calm down, I'm having nightmares when I'm asleep, I'm not depressed but the impossible financial reality is making me depressed...because... where can it go from here?

It will never get better? Just breathing and eating and sleeping somewhere safe costs too much money? Let alone upkeep of clothes for interviews, reliable computer to try to find jobs, even small fees for retraining???

I just want to go away and escape, I need to escape.

OP posts:
Original poster
despair1234 · 06/03/2018 16:14

*But can't you go there on an extended tourist visa and look for work there and apply to stay longer later? Is there any chance of getting married?

How long have you been together? Do you actually meet and see this man or is he an internet 'partner'?*

Are you trying to insinuate that I'm thick as well as poor and disabled? That my thickness is the reason I'm in such a bad situation?

Does that make you feel better or something? Maybe more secure, because you're so smart this could never happen to you?

No. I did not meet my partner on the internet. We meet in person regularly. I have had my flight tickets bought for me since I've been struggling financially, by my partner.

No, I can't go on an extended visa and apply to work when there. It doesn't work that way. If anything this would royally fuck up any future chance of getting a work visa the proper route.

I'm probably fairly stupid but not that fucking stupid.

OP posts:
TournesoletLavande · 06/03/2018 16:16

Can you do temp work through an agency? That way you can fit around when you are well enough and not take on more hours than you can manage. Do you live in London? If so consider moving to a cheaper city like Norwich or Leeds?

Don't know how old you are but is moving back with your parents an option?

JaneEyre70 · 06/03/2018 16:16

Is there a reason why you can't join your partner? It must be hard being in different countries.

Original poster
despair1234 · 06/03/2018 16:17

No, as I said in my first post I have no family.

OP posts:
Original poster
despair1234 · 06/03/2018 16:17

Yes, it is hard. We are working on it but it's difficult because visas are not lightly issued.

OP posts:
JaneEyre70 · 06/03/2018 16:17

Sorry x posted with your last one.

Morphene · 06/03/2018 16:17

op I totally get where you are coming from regarding context driven depression. You need to change your context, not get stuck on random tablets. By the way most depression isn't 'chemical imbalance' driven, its driven by other things causing people to behave in a way that imbalances their own chemicals...the cure is almost always to change the context or the behaviour.

On the flip side some treatment for anxiety might actually help with worrying about money. Money is a real issue in your life, but spending all your energy worrying about it isn't actually helpful?

I can also see that event management and long term health issues are difficult to deal with together - I imagine event management (whether freelance or not) involves being totally on the case for energetic periods of time....

Maybe a move to another area is a good idea? You might have general IT and admin type skills with your background...would part time working help?

Cliveybaby · 06/03/2018 16:18

What about staff on a cruise ship? It'd be live in while you're on board and I think the pay is ok... It's quite a strange lifestyle though

Original poster
despair1234 · 06/03/2018 16:21

Part time would be great, but I can't even seem to get that.

I will have a look at civil service jobs. I was under the impression there weren't too many vacancies with them these days unless you were very skilled in certain areas.

OP posts:
JaneEyre70 · 06/03/2018 16:22

It may be worth buying a copy of "The Lady" magazine - or looking at it online if you can. There are job adverts in there for companions or people to housesit that could sort out your immediate crisis. My DH's friend has just retired and he and his wife regularly house sit for people looking after the home and pets. You get to live somewhere very nice usually and get paid for it. It may be worth a look? Or register with a care company as a live in carer if you are physically able to?

TournesoletLavande · 06/03/2018 16:22

I wasn't trying to insinuate anything of the sort. I was just trying to ascertain why, considering you refer to this person as your partner, you aren't working towards trying to be together properly, either you there or him/her here.

Obviously there would be much less strain on you financially (as a childless person anyway) if you could share accommodation and split bills with your partner. And if you aren't well for chunks of time at least there would be some money coming in.

If he can afford to send you plane tickets then given how miserable and unwell you say you are I would have thought he'd have wanted you there with him for maybe three months or whatever is allowed on a tourist visa, while you get properly rested. It's not like you have a mortgage to keep up with or a regular full time job to go to, is it?

latebreakfast · 06/03/2018 16:24

Sorry if this isn't your thing at all - difficult to tell from your OP, but have you considered communal living? You can do this in the UK really cheaply, have the support of others, contribute what you can, and still be able to use our amazing free NHS. Have a look here if it interests you

cinderellawantstogototheball · 06/03/2018 16:25

I think you need to be careful re healthcare, OP. If you have health issues that mean you are regularly in hospital or at the dr, you need the NHS or an equivalent. Lots of cheaper countries might not have that sort of care, or you'd be required to pay upfront for it.

Original poster
despair1234 · 06/03/2018 16:26

"If he can afford to send you plane tickets then given how miserable and unwell you say you are I would have thought he'd have wanted you there with him for maybe three months or whatever is allowed on a tourist visa, while you get properly rested. It's not like you have a mortgage to keep up with or a regular full time job to go to, is it?"

No, but I am committed to paying my rent. I have been trying as hard as I can to use the time to find work. I want to work, I want to support myself, I don't want to aimlessly go off on a tourist visa.

We do want to be together. I also want to be able to earn money of my own. It's not always a piece of piss to make both those things happen.

OP posts:
grasspigeons · 06/03/2018 16:30
Flowers my sibling has a health condition that means no PIP but makes actual paid employment really difficult as there are medical appointments and days that they cant work due to health, or could work but only for a few hours. Its so hard to find jobs that accommodate that.

They have ended up doing a craft thing to supplement their income - which doesn't exactly make lots of money but might combine with the freelance bits you get?

trappedinsuburbia · 06/03/2018 16:30

OP if you have no other money coming in at the moment you will need to claim JSA and wouldn't that lead to housing benefit as well, I know its not a great amount but would alleviate some of the stress just now.

SluttyButty · 06/03/2018 16:30

Someone has a,ready said it but if you apply for pip then don’t fill the forms in yourself, they need to be worded quite specifically with plenty of evidence from whoever manages your health condition to stand a chance.

Atalune · 06/03/2018 16:31

I feel for you, I do. Sounds really fucing exhausting!

Can you doorstep some local cafes, bars ex and ask for shifts? If you are slightly older - like me, 40s) you might be just what theu want- reliable and mature.

Original poster
despair1234 · 06/03/2018 16:33

"my sibling has a health condition that means no PIP but makes actual paid employment really difficult as there are medical appointments and days that they cant work due to health, or could work but only for a few hours. Its so hard to find jobs that accommodate that. "

I really identify with this. I am not eligible for PIP either.

OP posts:
ArcheryAnnie · 06/03/2018 16:33

despair I hear you.

I am skint as am looking for a permanent job, but in the meantime I've got work as a market research interviewer. It's not great money, but what helps is that it's really, really flexible, so in your case you can take shifts according to how your health is at the time (so not like a coffee shop or a supermarket where you have to be there on x, y, z days - you choose the shifts).

Might you be able to google to see if there's anything like that where you live?

crunchymint · 06/03/2018 16:33

OP is very unlikely to get PIP from what she has posted.

MyDcAreMarvel · 06/03/2018 16:34

Op yes I have read the pip descriptors, I receive pip myself. If you have not applied you do not know that you are not eligeable.
What is your health condition?

BoobleMcB · 06/03/2018 16:34

Sorry if I'm missing the point or appear un-empathetic but if you're so concerned about money then why are you not claiming the JSA?! You say you're MH issues are caused by financial situation but then say that claiming JSA exacerbates them. I don't understand

NotSuchASmugMarriedNow1 · 06/03/2018 16:34

If you've got a clean record you can be a live-in carer. I can show you where to apply if you're interested and you PM me.

Atalune · 06/03/2018 16:35

Do you live in London?

You’d be better off heading north- hill, Newcastle, Bradford. All cities, but cheaper by far!

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