Cannot escape poverty, what's the cheapest place in the world for me to move to?

[despair1234]

I can't cope and getting depressed again. I can't earn enough money. Had a real go with lots of tries at being freelance, because my health problems make it extremely hard to keep a normal job. Time off for hospital appointments etc.

I'm on my own in the UK and just done. I have a partner is another country but don't have a visa.

Need to move somewhere it's really cheap to have housing and food, I can't cope here anymore. Everyday is a massive struggle worrying how to pay the bills once my savings totally run out. No money is coming in. Not entitled to any benefits apart from Jobseeker's Allowance maybe which I don't bother with because I can't stand the effect it has on my mental health.

I just can't cope. It's too expensive just being alive. I have no family I can go to stay with, there is literally nowhere to go to relax.

It's like being in a nightmare except I never wake up. Constant, constant stress of money I can never overcome. Yeah I can borrow money but have no way of paying it back if I can't earn.

Where can I go??? Where can I find somewhere to rest???? I need to calm down and can't calm down, I'm having nightmares when I'm asleep, I'm not depressed but the impossible financial reality is making me depressed...because... where can it go from here?

It will never get better? Just breathing and eating and sleeping somewhere safe costs too much money? Let alone upkeep of clothes for interviews, reliable computer to try to find jobs, even small fees for retraining???

I just want to go away and escape, I need to escape.

I'm not defensive. I'm simply not being listened to.

Well youre being very vague then barking at anyone who tries to fill the gaps and gets it wrong...

witholding

I'm an OT and I really sympathise with your situation.

It's easy for an outsider to say what you should be doing, but that's usually from a different starting point.

I was offered a locum job as a PIP assessor. Yuk. Appeared to come from an angle of stopping benefits rather than enabling work. Hope I'm wrong about that though. It was a while ago.

Anyway. I'd recommend starting with a list about what you can do - eg you're obviously computer literate.

Think about what your best outcome would be. (Self supporting?/living with DP)

What resources do you need to reach that goal? What are the barriers? What do you need to overcome them?

Start at the end then work back

I am NOT depressed. This isn't a 'chemical imbalance in my brain'

A lot of depression isn’t. The chemical imbalance theory is under attack and has never been really supported by much evidence. Depression and anxiety can be, and often are, a perfectly rational response to a shit situation.

Jesus Christ.

You are too sick to work full time. Too stressed to claim JSA. To stressed to claim PIP. Too proud to claim HB. Don't want to move to your DPs country cos you can't work (even for a holiday to rest for a few months?!?)

Why bother posting? People are only trying to see how you can get some money in or lower your living costs.

@KochabRising that is really interesting re the chemical imbalance thing being refuted

TournesoletLavande what do you mean?

What info do you need to know?

I've made it clear my partner lives in a country I can't just rock up and work in and that there are kids involved so they can't just move here.

I've made it clear I want to work.

What bit of that is a mystery to you? What? I don't understand what more you need to know?

How is that giving you info you can't work with - don't spout such rubbish.

Fluffy I will post if I like, thanks all the same. I've got some great ideas from the thread. If it irritates you so much to read, well nobody has a gun to your head. Off you pop.

Are you getting some kind of weird pleasure in being rude to people who are trying to help you?

I've made it clear I want to work.

And that is great.

What kind of work do you have the skills for?

What kind of work can you do with your mental and physical health?

How much of that work can you do?

Yes why are you so rude OP? Lots of suggestions and help from people on here any you just respond by being defensive and down right rude. Good luck with that.

Hi OP. I've sent you a PM.

@despair1234 for the love of god please don't apply to be a live in carer for anyone. No one deserves having someone with your disposition around them 24-7

What details am I being vague with?

It is not relevant to go into details of my health and symptoms and pain.

I have said I am not eligible for PIP. You can take my word for it.

I think what I, and Lavande were maybe getting at is that info on the nature of your health condition, and roughly which part of the world your partner lives would be helpful when trying to advise. You’ve said you can’t get there on a visa, maybe someone knows a way that you can - the visa system for all countries are really complex and often have loopholes, and/or ways around them. If we knew a bit more about the nature of your condition, pp could advise on more appropriate jobs, and if they have experience of claiming ESA etc with that particular condition. Nobody’s suggesting you’re an idiot, you’re very stressed and overwhelmed and all anyone joined this thread for is to try their best to help.

You’re trying to live as a single person, that in itself is tough. Only one wage to cover everything etc.
Have you considered moving to a cheaper area of the country. Up north, from the midlands onwards house prices are substantially cheaper, and you can find small flats or houses at under £500 pcm which are fine for a single person.
If you work freelance, hopefully you can work from anywhere.
There are lots of previous threads about cooking on a budget.
I understand life is tough right now, but honestly, your shitty attitude isn’t helping you, you have come across as rude to people who are trying to understand and offer help. If this is how you are in real life, maybe that’s part of your problem.... I wouldn’t want to take Ona freelancer with a shitty attitude and anger issues either.

Quote my rudeness?

Where am I being rude? Genuinely interested to see this.

I was snappy to the person who supposed I met a dream lover on t'internet, and was living in a fantasy virtual world.

Apart from that, do go ahead and point out my rudeness. I am fully prepared to apologise.

I've made it clear my partner lives in a country I can't just rock up and work in and that there are kids involved so they can't just move here.

You made all that clear after I and several other people had asked why you couldn't go to his country or have him come to you. And you did it with a shit load of attitude.

And frankly, as you sound unwell, lonely and vulnerable, yes people will wonder if he's the sort of 'partner in another country' who is only interested in what you can do for him, and not what he can do for you.

I can't offer any answers but I do sympathise. I am in the same position - chronic health problems that mean I can't do regular hours, full days or anything physical. Every now and again I need to go to bed for a month which most employers are not too understanding of but not bad enough for PIP.
I recently found a 10 hour a week, work from home admin job for a charity I volunteered with in the past so I thought I'd cracked it - only £100pw but a start. When I rang up they said the 10 hours were an average and 3 times a year when there were deadlines they'd expect me to work W/Th/Fri/Sat full days which I'd get back as lieu. I can't do full days and certainly not 4 on the trot without knackering my health so that was that.
How do I manage...well I do get ESA at the moment so definitely worth you applying for that. I get £110 per week in the support group but if you get put in the work related group I think it's £70. Also you can do permitted work without losing ESA - upto 16 hrs / £120 per week. This is what I hoped the admin job would fit into effectively doubling my income. I have started a proof reading course - hoping that I may be able to get some work through that which would fit into permitted work and I could do flexibly from home. Of course that would be freelance which I know you're already struggling with.
Other than that I'm just lucky that my DH works full time in an ok paid job. I don't know how I would manage otherwise. It's tight for us but DH's wage covers mortgage and essential bills so we're not desperate. Which I know doesn't help you but I do know where you're coming from.

Where is this shitty attitude?

Not to treat Mumsnet like free therapy but maybe someone could point it out because I'm not seeing it.

I should be eligible for PIP but even with assistance filling the form in (meaning someone did it for me) I got 0 points. It was a horrible experience.

OP I also have difficulties working full time but am able to take on temp work and live with intermittent work. Depending on where you are i the country, would that be an option? The places I've been have been fine if I've needed time for appointments/interviews and it's fine to go if you have better paid work availble.

Where is this shitty attitude?

Seriously?

Lavande you kept going on, and on,about my withholding information AFTER I'd said visas were difficult and there were kids at school.

Seriously. Where is it?

I second the TEFL idea - have a look at the different options available, the intensive but short version probably wouldn’t be any good with your health but there are other types. I did this in my twenties and it’s the best thing I have to my name, as I know I can go get a decent full or part time job with it in south east Asia or most places really. Problem is the initial cost. Which is always the problem I know.