To not want to go on holiday?

[HopelesslyHopeful87]

As a general disclaimer, I have quite bad anxiety and I think I may have over thought this. Didn't sleep a wink last night for worrying.

Holiday is booked for Easter holidays. We are booked to go in a static caravan. Me, DP, DD, DSD, DS and 4 month old DD. We are going with friends and their two DC in an 8 berth caravan. It was booked over a year ago before I knew I was expecting DD. Therefore there will be ten of us in the caravan. Wouldn't be a problem usually as two of the girls would top and tail.

The reasons for my worries are:

• DD is only four months old
• We will have to take her whole life with us
• She doesn't sleep brilliantly and is currently in a shit sleep regression
• There is nowhere in the caravan for her to sleep
• There is nowhere in the caravan for me to attempt a semblance of her bedtime routine.
• She has just got out of hospital with severe bronchiolitis which needed three days of intensive care where she almost needed ventilating. Thankfully that didn't happen. I am therefore worried about her being out in the cold and going swimming etc
• She also has reflux
• She is a very light sleeper to the point where us just turning over in bed at night disturbs ber

I am so anxious about not being able to keep her in routine that I've worked so hard to put in. Naps I can work around but at night we do bath, low lights and quiet and a bottle then in her crib in the dark and she self settles with Ewan. In a caravan the travel cot doesn't fit in the main bedroom does it so where will I put her to sleep? The van will be busy and with all the six other kids I don't see how I can do it.

It's making me not want to go. I feel like I'll be the only one bothered about how she sleeps and I'll be trying not to disturb the other kids and the other adults. It was decided that we would sleep in the living room sofa bed thing and the other adults would have the main bedroom due to fitting the travel cot in but that is making me feel worse because I can't go to bed if everyone else is up.

Someone please help me and tell me how I can work around this. The anxiety is doing my head in and is making it so hard to see the wood for the trees. Sorry this was so long.

Being completely honest... It's too many people in a small space. I would call it off if I were you.
Your worries on this sound well founded in this case.
I took my DS on a caravan holiday when he was 1, due to the lack of space I was relieved to come home and that was 3 of us in a 6 berth.

Just the thought of going on holiday with that many people in a caravan would stress me out. I dont understand why you agreed in the first place.
My advice is you and baby stay at home and DP goes with children.

Use the spending money you have saved to pay off your friends and none of you go

I wouldn’t have wanted to go with all those people crammed in before you had the baby, let alone with the baby!!

Can just your OH go with the older kids or just you with the older kids?

Can you get another van? Can a relative loon after the baby?

That sounds so stressful. If your DP can get the train (and then maybe a taxi to the holiday park) then I’d send him with the older kids but there’s no way I’d be going with the baby.

I would be another who wouldn't go. Send DH with the kids and you stay home with the baby. Sounds like a nightmare tbh.

Would your friends be flexible re your half if you didnt go? As that would be really helpful and it would be nicer for them caravan wise.
I dont think a holiday at all costs is better than no holiday tbh

I don't suffer from anxiety however in your situation I'd be rocking in the foetal position.
Not helpful but whatever possessed you to book this, even without your new baby?
For all of your sakes, and I know that this will not be popular, take the (financial) hit but cancel now. Your friends will be pissed off but rather that than a full blown MH crisis which is what I'd be having despite no depression or anxiety, ever. Best of luck with whatever you decide.

No way I'd go. That's no holiday. The caravan will be extremely crowded. It just sounds very stressful and I'd rather not go personally.

Just don't go sounds like hell on earth.

We go caravanning and do 4 in a 6 berth cabin and that is crowded enough. They are not designed for more than one family

Give friends the money you saved for spending- and pull out.

Even without your baby you would all be squashed.
I'm struggling to think why you agreed to thus, no offence.
We used to 2 adults and 3 small children in a 6 birth and that was enough people if I'm honest .

No way would I be going! That's just way too many people in a confined space, even without adding a small baby into the mix.
Either tell DH he can take the older kids (he can get a train or coach or something) or none of you go and you give your friends the money you saved for spends.

I am furiously trying to find a second van for a reasonable price as we speak.

To the PP that claimed 'I don't have a choice' in my relationship, please don't make assumptions. This is not in the relationships topic. My relationship with DP is very equal. He is just not as highly strung as me and doesn't get stressed about these things.

We have holidayed with the friends before minus the baby in one van and it was actually fine.

I am aware that the floor space in the main bedroom is non existent which is why we are supposed to be having the living room bed.

If someone can find a cheap van from 30th March to 6th April for me I would be grateful! I'm looking and they're all £600+

Op has little money. She likely accepted because it was a cheap break for the kids. And was less anxious. Anxiety is shit op hope you feel better soon x

Let's be honest, you're going to hate every second, and so will everyone else most probably.
My DSis has a 6 berth static and it's way too overcrowded when there's 5 of us. The idea of 10 people in a tin box only slightly bigger sounds like a punishment, not a holiday.
The only answer, if a 2nd caravan is out of the question, (and tbh you probably need 2 extra vans) is for your DH to take the older kids and you stay home with DD (and perhaps the next youngest too).

Don't sleep in main area. You definitely need a room. Put bassinet in middle of bed. You and dp sleep around it. Or dp sleeps in sleeping bag on floor. Get baby used to sleeping in bassinet now. Baby's sleeping is likely to change between now and Easter anyway as s/he is growing up fast so don't stress about it yet.

Thank you. I accepted because we had done it before. And it was fine. All the kids are aged 12, 11, 10, 7 and 6 so they're all big enough and we'll behaved. We won't have toddlers running round or anything. Two boys bad one twin room before and the three girls had one twin room before and either top and tailed or pushed the singles together and slept in that all together. They had a blast. We had the double room and friends had the living room bed.

It's the Easter holidays, it's going to be expensive .
Caravan bedrooms are designed to sleep in and that's about all.
I know you said you've done it before but it's not something id look forward to.

I couldn’t handle that. My anxiety would be through the roof and i’d probably end up completely exhausted as i’d be constantly on edge about the baby not sleeping well and waking everyone up. Hope you manage to find an easier solution

Cheap B&B nearby? Might be cheaper than a whole other caravan. Where are you going?

Sorry op but no way. Too many people in one van with a newborn

Trecco bay, Porthcawl. Lovely site.

Friends booked through parkdean which is ££££ but private owned seem cheaper. I've sent some enquiries.

I did a static caravan week with 3 dc when the youngest was 5 months, it was amazingly sunny and there was 5 of us in a four birth. Youngest dc got cold during the night and I found it impossible to keep him warm no matter how many blankets he had on.

I wouldn't do it, especially since your dd has been so poorly.