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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be pissed off with my employee?

161 replies

Fueledwithfairydustandgin · 02/03/2018 21:27

I have very recently employed a new girl to help with my horses. She wasn't quite what I was looking for in the level of her experience but I liked her and maybe saw a bit of myself in her and decided to hire her and train her on the job. This isn't totally ideal in that I'm busy and this is another drain on my time. It's being going ok but on Tuesday she contacted me to let me know she wouldn't make it in due to the snow. I was a bit annoyed because it wasn't that bad and I could have picked her up from the village as I've done before to save her mum (who drops her off as she doesn't drive). It meant I was left with a yard full of animals in the snow and a toddler on my own. She has just contacted me to say she won't be in this weekend because she went to her granny's to help her out with her horses (45mins away, we live 10 tops) and is now snowed in there. My PILs have just driven home via that way no trouble. I am worried because she needs lots of training which I'm loathe to do if she's going to be unreliable. She wants to bring a horse here which I'm happy with except I would have had yet another animal to look after. I'm worried I will seem like an unreasonable bitch if I sack someone for not turning in when the weather has been so horrific but I feel the whole thing has been a bit unprofessional.

OP posts:
Bettyfood · 03/03/2018 07:52

She doesn't sound very committed, but I'd have a kind chat with her when she comes in and give her another chance.

LifeBeginsAtGin · 03/03/2018 07:52

If she was that passionate about horses she'd have walked to get there.

and what will happen if she has a horse there and it snows? Will YOU be looking after HER horse????

LouHotel · 03/03/2018 07:53

Reading your last post I think yabu.

  1. You live rurally and know the roads are bad.
  1. Animal welfare for animals on your property is your concern
  1. You didnt offer to pick her up, by the by i run a hotel and paid for my staffs taxi's the last few days because i needed them in to look after customers.
  1. They travelled to an ederly relative - her grandmother wouldnt have been your main concern but it is hers.

If the young girl has given you no other reason to suggest she's not committed you are v unreasonable to use this past week as an example.

sonjadog · 03/03/2018 07:54

I think your message sounds like the right response. She needs to think about her commitment and a stern message should do the trick.

GnotherGnu · 03/03/2018 07:59

you’re acting like she owes you something

Well yes, if someone gives you a job and pays you, you do owe them something.

LightastheBreeze · 03/03/2018 07:59

We don't know how old she is, there is a difference if she is 18-20 or 15-16, also double what you would pay a 16 year old is probably similar to adult NMW

GnotherGnu · 03/03/2018 08:01

All the people saying she was right to put her grandmother first seem to be missing the fact that she has parents at least one of whom could be expected to help out with granny's horses.

Pengggwn · 03/03/2018 08:02

GnotherGnu

You do, but you don't owe them indentured servitude. There are going to be situations where you can't attend work and employers - however they feel about it - should be reasonable and take driving conditions into account. All this 'I drove through the floods, it was just me and Noah's Ark' stuff is a bit much, isn't it? The weather is bloody awful. If someone can't drive safely to work, they shouldn't go.

mmzz · 03/03/2018 08:06

Sack her. . She is too much work for you now that you know her better.

She got a lucky break with you agreeing to put yourself out for her and now she isn't honouring her side of the bargain. Either you'll have to try to train her about taking responsibility, as well as how to do the job, or you can find someone else who understands the commitment and responsibility part already.

eddielizzard · 03/03/2018 08:08

i'd be cross. she couldn't make it to you who lives 10 min away, but she could go to her gran a day later, in more snow, with worse roads 45 min away?

i'd have a word rather than write a message. ask about her gran, ask about her mum's driving, find out more info before you weigh in there. when you've got a full picture tell her why you're disappointed.

mmzz · 03/03/2018 08:08

@pengywnn where does that attitude leave the horses?

Pengggwn · 03/03/2018 08:09

mmzz

What attitude?

Coloursthatweremyjoy · 03/03/2018 08:10

I've never worked with animals OP but I was a young apprentice once. I was awful actually, bit unreliable, not really ready for it. A bit used to being pandered to by my parents to be honest. (I didn't know how to iron, put it that way).

I wasn't fired but a manager did have "a word" told me in no uncertain term what was expected and pointed out they could let me go if that's what I wanted.

It was what I needed to pull myself together. I think you should have that chat with your employee, if she's been good otherwise. Let her know that not coming to you because of the snow then going further afield isn't on. Treat her like an adult.

Tumbleweed101 · 03/03/2018 08:10

I think you should have a chat when she’s back and then draw a line under it.

I’ve a dd of 17 who isn’t driving yet. She’s due for work today and my fear of driving in snow may well decide if she gets there whatever commitment she has. And if I had concerns about my parents they’d prioritise over my dds part time job.

Go lightly, the girl could have been begging her mum to take her for all you know. Pre driving teens are at the mercy of where their parents have raised them.

mmzz · 03/03/2018 08:11

This attitude : . If someone can't drive safely to work, they shouldn't go.

Pengggwn · 03/03/2018 08:13

mmzz

Right, that. It leaves them under the care of their owner, the only person whose responsibility for them is unconditional.

Original poster
Fueledwithfairydustandgin · 03/03/2018 08:13

Hmm Penwgggn have you come to be helpful or just make unhelpful, smart (in your head) comments? I was demonstrating that when you care for animals you go above and beyond. It's not like she has gone to care for a little housebound granny. She has gone to look after a Shetland pony and I'm guessing her aunts horse because the aunt is pregnant. She is 16 and I said I was happy to pay the same as I would any adult that came for the job. Because she is so inexperienced I don't pay the full amount (still double her minimum wage) but said I will increase it as soon as she is more up to speed.

OP posts:
NataliaOsipova · 03/03/2018 08:14

So she couldn't get to the next village to see to your horses but somehow got to granny's 45 minutes away to see to hers?

This!

george49 · 03/03/2018 08:15

At 16 she's a child.

Get an adult and provide proper working conditions

Original poster
Fueledwithfairydustandgin · 03/03/2018 08:16

Also penwgggn where would that leave her horse? She viewed one last week so if she'd liked it that would have been here too

OP posts:
LightastheBreeze · 03/03/2018 08:17

She is a child then, I would employ someone over 18 and YABU if she was an adult I would think differently.

Pengggwn · 03/03/2018 08:18

OP, not everyone who comments here is going to agree with you. It's not my job to 'help', it's to answer your question - yes, you are being unreasonable to expect your employer to take the level of responsibility for your animals that you took on when you bought them.

Creambun2 · 03/03/2018 08:18

Get her out - their are young people who are committed to working with horses and their are young people who like the idea but lack any appreciations of the work/commitment needed.

Pengggwn · 03/03/2018 08:18

*employee

CherryMaDeary · 03/03/2018 08:20

Definitely don't have her horse here until passes her probation period and displays commitment.

I hooe you're not paying her for the missed days.