To expect some help from my GP in losing weight?

[Chubbychubchub]

I am a fatty. Properly overweight. About 8 stone over normal weight range (about 19st, I should be 11st at most according to BMI).

Last year I had some health issues. My GP said I'd benefit from losing weight. Just eat less and move more were her words.

I have tried. However I struggle to control what I eat, and have zero willpower.

I did go to a well known slimming group previously. It made me ill, though I did get down to 13st. But it wasn't sustainable.

I asked my GP for help. I was told 'all they could do was refer me to the nurse, but she would tell me the same. That was all they could do and there was no other help available.

I have heard of people locally being referred to a dietician, or sent to slimming group for free etc. Aibu to expect something similar, or certainly some kind of help beyond trite advice?

I cannot read the whole thread so apologies if this has already been mentioned (and I expect it has, in which case I'm merely reiterating!), but I cannot recommend Michael Moseley's 8 week plan highly enough. I lost 18lbs in 8weeks following this and now have adapted the low sugar regime. It's great, healthy and you see quick results, which appeals to me. Other than that, it is all really 1) eat less, 2) move more 3) have smaller portions. That may not be palatable or money-making advice, but it's really not more complex than that.

Op you are doing well with your plan for this evening. It is difficult sticking to it but it's good you've started it. Good luck

Without meaning to be too deep and meaningful, I think you need to look at why you overeat. I am not overweight, but I am about a stone heavier than is ideal for me. A lot of the reason for this is a mixture of comfort eating and bad habits. I am really trying to note why I eat and to break some of the bad habits. For instance, I can end up eating a massive bag of crisps whilst being on here, not good and not needed. Part of it is seeing eating as an excuse to sit down, when I am on the go, constantly busy etc, its like a comfort thing and its easy to carry on comfort eating as it doesn't cost much time and money, unlike most things that you could do to make yourself feel better. I personally dont think its the food choices, I think its the amount. Also, if you have a day where you can hand on heart (no kidding yourself) say that you haven't eaten less, if for you it is less it counts as less. Nevermind if someone starts to quote how you only need 1000 cals at a certain age or whatever, if you are eating less than you normally eat you will lose weight. Obviously this amount and the speed of this will change as you get smaller. Dont know if that makes sense.

Chubby
You are bloody minded and stubborn.
Turn those to your advantage.

Decide why YOU want to get lean
ignore all of the reasons other people tell you
pick one that matters to YOU

and then use that to focus your evident energy into getting lean
it will involve eating a lot less
it will involve giving up snacking
it will involve changing the way you cook meals for your whole family

but mostly it will involve you focusing on what you DO WANT
rather than what you DO NOT
and then you will succeed

I'm sorry, but you need to deny yourself. It's what willpower is about - the ability to withstand frustration. No, you don't have to go hungry - but you need to stop reaching for the food whenever you feel sad or tired or lonely.

And nobody, nobody can help you with that. Either you want it or you don't.

Another one suggesting SW again. The group I attend is bloody brilliant - which is why I still go every few weeks now I'm a target member.

We have people coming from other groups and staying - you're allowed to do this! Not all groups suit all people.

OP it’s very hard but there is only one solution here . And it’s not actually exercise which helps but the main part is from eating less . The GP can’t help you .

Can you not think of any practical steps to kick start this ? Sorry 😐

Chubby come join us in the weight loss section on the 100lbs or more to lose thread?
Lovely supportive group and have an insight into the complexities of being morbidly obese.
Ultimately you have to be ready to make a change for ever

If you have gallstones are you not on a list to get them removed. I had gallstones after my 1st pregnancy, not overweight so I think some people just get them. However I was advised to follow a low fat diet. I don't understand how you can eat sausages, lasagne and peanut butter and be on a low fat diet. I'm not trying to be rude just relaying the advice I was given at the time. I was told to try to eat food that was less than 5% fat. I ate a lot of chicken, turkey and lean pork for meat. A lot of stir frys, soups, etc. I stopped eating butter and switched to a low fat spread and only drink semi or skimmed milk. I found that low fat options are generally horrible so I just cut out biscuits etc and if I wanted something sweet I had a little bit of dark chocolate.
Now I didn't do this for weight loss but in terms of your gallstones trying to be as low fat as possible will help. I found at first I missed certain foods but 3 years on and 1 gallbladder less I still only eat really fatty food very rarely. Although I am pregnant again and craving cheesecake so that might not last.

Octopus, I eat too much because I can. Because I'm greedy. Because I don't know when to stop.
I think that's probably what a lot of posters think. Probably all they think. That I'm fat because of it.
It isn't just that though.
Food is my friend. I eat to reward myself (many of us do it - we talk about 'treating ourselves' to a cake, or being naughty by eating a choccie bar) or to cheer myself up - and again lots of us do this ('sit day at work so I got a takeaway on the way home' as many posts on here go. That was me too. And I think when I just treated food like that as an occasional pick me up or reward, I was a normal weight. Ish.
But through various not very nice things that have happened I also see that I use it as an emotional crutch. I have eaten until I cried. because forcing the food in was the only thing that stopped it hurting. It was the only thing that made me feel less alone in desperate times. When none of my friends bothered, when the man who supposedly loved me beat me, spat in my face and told me I was worthless, food made that less shit.
And being fat made me more invisible, weirdly the bigger I got the less he noticed me. Even though all thats in the past, every disagreement I have now food is my go to.
Dealing with this thread has made me want to eat until I'm sick. Because I feel like shit but I know the food will stop that. It's basically like self harm.
I see now that I should have explained all this to my GP (although in fairness she also could have probed a little deeper rather than giving me a stock answer). I do think this does need discussing with someone who has the relevant expertise.

To be honest op, I’ve been at the weight you are and the only thing that did it for me was the cambridge weight plan.

People think it’s expensive but if you add up all the shops / takeaways / snacks etc it ends up being cheaper, plus you know exactly what you will be paying each week.

I went from pushing 19 stone to just under 12 and have kept it off for 5 years. I eat a very healthy diet now, but I needed the gap in eating normal food to eat to re learn how to eat properly.

I HTH. My gp never offered me any support either, in fact I was just told ‘you’re not big enough for us to intervene’

Chubbychubchub

Perhaps you need to work on ways to heal yourself rather than focussing on the weight?

If you have MH issues then that needs to be addressed, whether depression, anxiety or whatever- and that is something your GP may be able to help you with.

The weight isn't really the main problem, it's a symptom of your pain.

Take care of that and you will be able to tackle the weight loss.

The weight isn't really the main problem, it's a symptom of your pain.
THis with bells on.

I post on two major thread areas

• weight loss
• debt management

and both finally come down to dealing with the underlying stresses that lead people to make bad decisions although the debt job gets easier on Thursday now that the FCA have finally listened to me

I haven't read the whole post but most places have a tier 3 weight loss service that works with people with BMI over 40 using a psychological approach. Disordered eating related to obesity needs psychological support and the answer is not will power as much as some people think it is. In fact the only evidence base for a BMI over 40 for sustained weight loss is surgery . Tier 3 can refer for surgery but that isn't their only input. Also some areas having an IAPT or talking health service that can offer support around disorders/emotional eating.

Oh, OP you have had an awful time, you've been in an abusive relationship and that is still affecting you a lot more than perhaps you realise, and you're not well either. Gallstones can be agonising.

You're trapped in a vicious circle. There's a few things that perhaps you could think about trying.

Go back to the doctor and ask whether there is anything that can help with the trouble you are having with the gallstones. You are having symptoms regularly, and they can't just let you suffer. If the doctor is unhelpful, then is there another GP at the practice you could see? Don't let them fob you off.

Have you mentioned to your GP about your traumatic abusive relationship? Your self-esteem must be at rock-bottom. If you say you aren't coping emotionally and really need help, then they should be able to refer you for counselling to support you. Maybe if you could feel better in yourself, then that would help everything else, including the comfort-eating, and you would feel more motivated to eat more healthily.

Some people have been unneccesarily blunt on here, but there are also a lot of others who have come up with good advice.

Best of luck and be kind to yourself

Oh - and drink more water even if you don't like it much!

OP. I don't think another referral will help you. The question you need to ask is why don't you want to lose weight? You are worth more than you think. I do understand how you feel. I'm overweight and recovering from a back injury. I've had months of from work and lost most of my strength because I've not been able to move. I've now started going to the gym and doing the small weights there and walking on the treadmill (as advised by my Phsyio). It's tough to make a start but you need to be kind to yourself and crappy food just isn't worth it. You can do this but you have to do it yourself. The only person who can change your attitude is you. You can do this xxx

Dealing with this thread has made me want to eat until I'm sick. Because I feel like shit but I know the food will stop that.

Chubby the change you can make today is, before you do have a good think....
Will the food solve the problem?
How will I feel afterwards?

It won’t solve your issues and if your anything like me you will feel disgusted and worse afterwards.

Go and have a hot bubble bath, paint your nails, read a book or something else you like to comfort yourself and hopefully after the feeling will have gone.

It takes lots of effort to break those old patterns

Good grief take responsibility for yourself.

Stop buying snack food so much, if it isn't in the house then you can't eat it.

I think you need some professional help to help you not only with your addiction to food but your appalling attitude towards people that have taken time out of their day to try and help you by posting on this thread.

It isn't our fault that your are overweight, it is your fault.

Sorry if that sounds harsh but it is true.

Only you can do something about it.

I think having been on the receiving end of some of the stuff on this thread being a little defensive can't be surprising
Seriously, you have not been on the receiving end of anything other than a lot of people giving you some really good advice.

Less whinging, more action!!

Re counselling. Have you tried self referring through MIND? They do free workshops and group therapy sessions. My DH went on some. I think he self referred through their website.

PersianCatLady - bit harsh, the OP is still suffering from the abuse she received from her ex, she doesn't need people telling her to buck her ideas up, she needs help.

OP YANBU, you do need help from your GP and a referral, you need to be emotionally ready to help yourself, but you clearly aren't able to at the moment. Hopefully you will get some counselling so you can move on from how worthless your ex made you feel, and once your self-esteem has improved, things won't feel so daunting.

You're very angry with your ex and you have the right to be.

Eating to make yourself feel better is punishing yourself though. And whether you comfort eat or not, the memories of his abuse WILL peep through. You will be triggered by one thing or another and fall face down in a pizza.

Your weight is symptomatic of your mental health, which comes across as poor. You work 12 hours a day and reward that effort with food in the evenings, letting the snacks in almost like having a mate come round.

You have been pretty awful on this thread, but a lot of what you have said to and about people is negative selfspeak "They probably think I'm lazy" "They all just think I'm just greedy" "They probably think I deserve it" . You need to stop thinking you can mindread. You can't. And you need to stop lumping everyone who says critical things to you in with an ex who used criticism to abuse you. It's dreadfully rude and unfair to the 95% of people who have turned up here to HELP you.

No, I don't think you're lazy. It takes a great deal of work to go about your daily business at 9 stone overweight. You do sound trapped under the belief that you CANNOT do this. You know you can, you've done it before.

It pisses me off that your GP wasn’t helpful, as it’s the NHS who are constantly telling everyone that the overweight and the obese are putting such a strain on their services, and costing a fortune. The least they could’ve done would’ve been to give you some leaflets, or ask if you have any other symptoms, such as depression, which could indicate an underlying health condition that would make it hard to lose weight.

Check online and see if you have any symptoms of an under active thyroid. If you have, go straight back to your GP and tell them your concerns and tell them you need a blood test done.

One of my Aunties put on lots of weight, then just could not lose it, and when she did, she kept putting it back on. She sorted out her thyroid and is now able to regulate her weight.

The NHS website is a lot more helpful for assistance with weight loss than the GP’s are. They have apps and downloadable trackers for monitoring food intake and exercise. They also have exercise plans, and ideas for healthy snacks and meals, and how to incorporate exercise into your daily routine.

Very best of luck op.