To ignore my cat's cries of distress? LIGHTHEARTED!

[SneakyGremlins]

His food bowl is 2cm to the left of where it "should be", in his eyes. HE moved it

We have a rescue kitten who likes to make it sound like she's being murdered or in pain. First time we heard it we were really concerned only to find out that she makes this sound when she's found socks/tights/my freshly ironed dress for work. She is a dickhead cat.

keep em coming!

Our other cat is very possessive over my partner. If he goes in the cellar she yowls at the door until he returns. She also likes curling up next to him at bedtime and I swear she looks smug whilst doing it.

One of my brothers cats says hello, he didn't tell us until the cat scared
the living shit out of my mum. She went to catsit in the arse end of nowhere and a cat wandered in and said hello to her

We have six cats.

Felix is 13 years old and we got him last year (number 5) and we honestly thought he had problems with his thyroid, I have never known a cat eat so much fucking food. It got to the point that DP was feeding him when he got up, then I was feeding him and then he would demand another breakfast and then down again at 12 for lunch and then the whole fucking hassling for dinner would start around 3.30. He has no health problems, he's either just fucking greedy or has some sort of cat dementia and has forgotten that he has had his food already. Nowadays DP is banned from feeding breakfast as the cats always look to me for food and give me so much grief if I don't feed them.

Pixie. Pixie is a tiny little cute female who we rescued in November (number 6). She is beautiful and an absolute unholy terror. She chases all the cats, has to be restrained when I'm cooking/making lunches. I left DP's sandwiches on the worktop yesterday while I went to the fridge in the conservatory to get something and when I came back they were gone. She had dragged the bag into the living room and was frantically trying to rip it open. I still put them in DP's lunch although he says he could see teeth marks in the bread!!

We have four of the feline dictators in our household.

OldBazCat aka 'The King' is the head of the pack. He sits where he wants whenever he wants and woebetide those who stand/sit in his way. He can cut you dead with a look.

GingerBazCat aka 'The Knave' is annoying but cute. Purrs far too loudly and dribbles.

GirlBazCat aka The Princess is a sweetie but has a mean streak. She likes to bring me frogs. Yum.

DivvyBazCat aka 'The Jester' is Girls brother. He is a huge, long haired black ball of gorgeousness but probably the most stupid cat I have ever owned. He likes to jump in your seat on our black leather sofas then has the nerve to protest when he gets sat on.

On the plus side, they aren't food fussy and sleep in seperate areas of the house at night. Dedicated cat slaves here!!

My little madam will only eat Whiskas pouches in gravy.
She wont touch anything in jelly, tin food is a big no no. Other brands are only sniffed, she doesnt like Dreamies.
Sometimes she will wait by the baby gate to the kitchen so me or DH will let her in/out despite I ve seen her many times jumping over it.

I have a Maine coon. I'm pretty sure he's inbred as he's so thick it's unbelievable. Despite his food bowl BEING IN EXACTLY THE SAME PLACE FOR FOUR YEARS he miaows until I pick him up and fucking plonk him in front of it. He also miaows constantly wanting to be let in the front room DESPITE the door being open 🤦🏼‍♀️ how he thinks he's not called dickhead is beyond me

Loverofcake I have two Maine Coons...and I agree... thick as mince!
One of mine (a 24 pound fatso who is unfaithful and sleeps with several of our neighbours) Scratches at the back door every night... the wrong one..the one we can't see or hear...
Also when he uses the litter tray he stands in it (HUGE tray) and shits over the edge. Every damn time.

His sister falls off my lap every time she jumps up..she gets comfy, rolls for a tummy rub and SPLAT.

However the prize goes to my 18 year old, slightly deaf, probably a bit senile, old girl, who sings the song of her people outside DS2's door at approx 2am every night, has to be placed (and preferably hand fed) her ..tuna, prawns, freshly cooked chicken. She refused cat food about a year ago and cos she is so old, we stupidly went with it!

@StillMedusa haha it must be the breed! He's my second Maine coon but my first wasn't this stupid ( mind you she was a fiesty girl)

I love my catface. But man she’s a pest. I keep reminding her that she’s “pets” not “pest” but she doesn’t get it.

She is another food crusher. We feed her at breakfast time, and when we get home from work. If we leave a days worth of biscuits out she will scoff the lot and vom somewhere unreachable.

I’m on maternity leave at present and she hasn’t quite grasped the concept of “mummy’s Home a lot” so every time I come back from being out she wants food. She paws at me and cries like she’s never been fed ever in her life.

In the mornings (6am) she’s there either by the side of the bed or on my nightstand pawing at me. Meowing. Because she will starve.

Dh suggested we shut the bedroom door. Obvious. This will stop her bouncing on the bed all night and meowing and being a pest. (He’s so smart to think of this....) she sits outside the door and howls and scratches it. He was away for 3 weeks last year and I shut the door. It lasted a few nights.

She’s an ex feral rescue. She’s so soft and cuddly. She doesn’t know how lucky she is.

Our older cat got his spot on. Should stay put inside for an hour afterward they said. So we locked the cat flap. He was sitting in front of it, banging at the door with his paw till it snapped in two.
He waits for me to go to bed every night and snuggles up beside me.
Brought me a live mouse and called me to teach me how to hunt.
The younger one is ultra random. Bananas bonkers mad.

Our cat is in an evil twisted mood tonight. She has always had a soft spot for dd3 who is 7 months. When dd3 first came home if she started to cry dcat would come get me from the bathroom or kitchen and miaow until I went to dd3. I thought it was sweet.
Dd3 is currently snuggling to go to sleep because she's teething so needs cuddles to settle. Dcat sits on the other side of the room and slowly struts across the room making sure dd3 spots her. As soon as dd3 does she turns as far as she can in to dcats direction. Dcat then walks over to us making dd3 get so happy and excited she begins to squeal and bounce, then as soon as dcat is at my feet she pauses before running back to the other side of the room making dd3 grumpy and shout. 6 times in the past hour she has done this I'm not sure what I've done to offend her.

Mine is so conniving, I paid a visit earlier and she followed me so I thought 'ok cat, come, even though you're not invited'.

Whilst we were out she pranced around me like a kitten, lovingly wrapping her tail around my ankles and purring and was praised for how sweet she is.

We got back home and she instantly snapped back into 'do this NOW, HUMAN' demanding to be fed and sulking in a corner

My cat used to want for himself a y chair or sofa where one if us was settled and sitting. No other free seat would do and he would sit in front of us and yowl about it. We ignored him.

It is funny to look back on, and a fond memory. He was a real character cat and I miss him so much. He died a few weeks ago, needing put to sleep on Christmas morning when old age suddenly overwhelmed him.

I have found my tribe!

My cat wakes me up in the morning by batting me in the face so I can get up and feed him. Once I've done his bidding, he goes back to bed.

Rotten sodding beast.

I had a cat that would no joke wake me up between 5 and 7 in the morning because she wanted me to turn the shower on...so she could stick her face under it to drink and lick the water off the wall. Cuz that was somehow way better than water in her bowl changed twice a day, even better then water from a Brita filter or bottled from a spring or mountain or blessed by angels in Antarctica.

My girl is so very dim. My ds gave her a piece of chicken the other day, she ate a bit but left some so he put it in her food bowl. A few hours pass, cat comes down from upstairs where she has been sleeping on my bed cue 30 minutes of plaintive meows. Doesn't want to go out, doesn't want a cuddle, I finally twig that she is scared of the chicken in her bowl and can only eat once I have removed it! It was about 1cm long! It took her 6 years to work out that she could open the door to the living room by pushing it even though she saw her sister do it hundreds of times. She would just sit on the other side and cry!

Catface has a water fountain....

Mine will go out of the cat flap, through the garden, over the gate and round to the front doorstep to sit there and wail until he is let back into the house. Then do it all over again. It’s not like he doesn’t know the cat flap is a two way deal!!!

Mine bashes on the back door (thus prompting his minion the cockapoo to fetch me) until it’s opened and then marches through the house to be let out of the front. All saving himself a walk of about six feet compared to walking round.

He also wanders into the road in front of unsuspecting motorists and hurls himself on the tarmac in a very dramatic “play dead” manner. They stop, thinking they’ve killed him and he gets up and saunters off. Luckily it’s the end of a cul de sac.

I don't officially have a cat. Next door's cat thinks otherwise. She sits on my doorstep or windowsill and wails for food. She is a tub of lard. She cannot be hungry. My neighbour thinks I'm trying to tempt her away with tasty treats. I. Do. Not. Feed. The. Cat.

I had to get up an hour earlier than usual today,crept around getting breakfast and tea...first the cat gives me disgruntled and bemused stares from her chair,then she sat bolt upright and gave me the evil eye.
Then she followed me to where I was eating and threw things at me...well,she wandered the room knocking Lego off shelves,the odd sweet off the piano,anything she could reach really,but that was exactly what it felt like...Why aren't you feeding me (bash,flick,flying Lego ). If it's the morning,I need food (chucks toffee on floor). GIVE ME ATTENTION,!! (Knocks over DVD)
Love her to bits!

My DCat will only eat 4 out of 6 sachets of the Gourmet Mon Petit pack. Won’t eat anything else

Cat 1 spends a lot of his time forcing open the sliding doors of the wardrobe so that he can escape from Cat 2. He also enjoys sitting in the bath after it's just been emptied. Cat 2 enjoys getting on his hind legs and banging with his front paws on the living room door very early every morning for his breakfast. He hates closed doors so will bang on them to be let in, and then wanders out again. I love them loads.