Tiny things that make YBVVVVVU

[Crapuccino]

Guest came over at the weekend. Tipped out the last of the cup of tea she’d made for herself into the sink as we were saying our goodbyes, aong with the teabag. Left the teabag sat there in the plug hole.

Right. There. In the plug hole.

I know, I know, who cares, just fish it out and throw it away when she’s gone, but I momentarily had visions of stuffing said teabag up one of her nostrils in revenge.

Help reassure me that I am not alone in my insanity. What tiny, ridiculous, non-things give you the murdrous rage?

MIL rinsing used mugs in dregs of cold water in the bowl because "it's only a cup"

DH overfilling kettle so it takes ages to boil

FIL having TV on too loud BUT subtitles on too

People who email you then phone to ask if you got their email

People who sit on the aisle seat of a train leaving window seat empty

We don't have a dishwasher so wash everything by hand.

I make sure the knives are all pointing down when I've done it. The sink is right next to the back door.'one trip and you could lose an eye.

My Dh? Knives go in anyway he throws them. Blade up and blade down.

Makes me cross everytime

People who get on the lift when it's going in the opposite direction. I understand when it's so busy it's the only way to get a space from a middle floor but when it's not it drives me crazy.

People wearing half a bottle of perfume when they come to visit and want a cuddle with your baby. I'm expecting dc2 and considering asking a few select relatives to not soak themselves before they arrive.

It takes away the newborn smell and all I can smell for days is their shitty perfume!!!!!!

Dh does the bins on a Wednesday morning. Except, all he does is wheel the bin to the kerb. He doesn’t go round the house and empty the fucking bins. Last Wednesday, he’d only put one of our two black bins out. So after the school run, I race round, empty all the bins (including Nappies in bathrooms etc) and fill the other black bin, and put it on the kerb. He strolls in that evening and says ‘how come you put the other bin out?’- so received a ten minute lecture about how we don’t need to keep stinky Nappies for two weeks. Apparently, it’s me that is Unreasonable for not allowing him to do his task his own way.....

Putting the mug on the counter above the dishwasher

We call this "near to" in our house. It is related to laundry near the basket, shopping put on the worktop above the cupboard it belongs in. Or my personal hate, things put on top of things with lids e.g things for the bin on top of the bin lid, stuff on top of the laundry basket. I've always threatened to serve raw dinner and say "well, I put it near to the oven"

Others that bother me:

Misuse of apostrophes, particularly in signs for businesses. The worst offender being the bloody library with its DVD's. And the damned iPhone auto corrects "its" to "it's" every time.

Things put away in packs. So we get fruit pots, 4 in a cardboard cover, just thrown in the fridge so I have to unwrap them. Ditto beans, tuna etc.

We have corner cupboards, when you open one, its metal handle hits off the other door and makes a tapping sound.

I left out the twats who never zero out the microwave after they've removed something from it early.
And misuse of the apostrophe and all misspellings done by printers/sign painters for businesses, who truly ought to know better.
Twats at work who leave dirty spoons on countertop near coffee service, not to mention crumbs everywhere. Your mother doesn't work here, so clean up after yourself, you bloody bint!

People who are using jam or other spreads and stick the knife into the jar, usually the same knife they have used for the butter.

USE A FUCKING SPOON!!! 😣

My bloody family are guilty of nearly all of the above, I’m surprised I haven’t got seriously high blood pressure from the stress it all causes 😳

Food items that have been opened and put in fridge without being covered up. I. E in a tub or a sandwich bag.. I bin so much because of this.

Teutonic I'm with you on the jam!

Yerroblemom1923 That was DH. Apparently they were "soaking".

@TeachesOfPeaches couldn't agree more. If I were King for a day, I'd ban it all forever more.

@Crapuccino your OP made me snort out loud reading your desire to stuff a teabag up their nostril.

Can we add people (i.e. DC) who only ever put empty packets back in the cupboard/fridge/freezer? There I am, knowing that there will be a nice nocturnal hot cross bun in the freezer - only some bugger has just put an empty packet back. Whereas anything else is, obviously, left out to rot.

Teutonic, I always use a knife and my jam has never gone mouldy. I think it's too frequently used - and also I keep it in the fridge.

DH makes himself a marmalade sandwich straight on the counter rather than on a plate or cutting board "to save [me] washing up". Then he walks around the kitchen munching this culinary masterpiece, continuing to save me washing up. [what's the symbol for ballistic?]

When I buy Muller fruit corner yoghurts and catch the kids stirring the fruit into the yoghurt, instead of spreading it in an even layer over the top, like any sensible person would do!

When we have been to the supermarket for the big shop and there is stuff all over the worktops as I am putting it away and DH will start to make a sandwich before I have finished and then leave everything out/open.

DH does not fold the towels in the correct way on the bathroom radiator. He stuffs them all on to the top bar.

Dh taking the dirty dishes out of the sink and putting them on the side, I hate dirty dishes all over the worktops. I wash the dishes under running hot water so it doesn't matter about filling the sink with water before washing. Drives me. I wash the dishes 99.99% of the time so leave them in the sodding sink.

On the 0.01% of the time that dh does the dishes he fills the sink with hot water and then leaves it when he's done so it ends up being a sink full of cold, greasy, filthy water. Drives me bloody insane.

Washing left on top/next to/behind the empty/half full laundry basket or on the bathroom floor. Dcs hoarding mucky uniform in their bedroom despite being told a million times to bring uniform downstairs so I can wash it. Then moaning that they have no clean uniform to wear.

Dh making a tea/coffee and leaving the spoon in the draining board instead of putting it in the sink.

Dh taking huge chunks out of the butter when he makes a sandwich/toast so the butter has huge potholes instead of being level.

The toothpaste being squeezed from the middle instead of the end and the lid being left off.

Ds leaving his empty plate on the table and then walking into the kitchen for a drink, then moaning when he has to go back to the table for his plate before going upstairs. He does this every single day despite us pointing out that he could just take the plate with him in the first place.

I can't watch anything with dd because she yaps through the whole thing. "Who's that?" "why's she doing that?" "what's going to happen?" if you'd shut up and watch the bloody film dd you'd know who everyone is and what's happening.

Noisy eaters isn't a small thing, it's a huge thing. I get stabby and instantly pissed off if I can hear people eating with their mouth open of smacking their lips. If you can't chew with your mouth closed then don't stuff so much bloody food in it.

Likewise bloody football managers chewing gum with their mouths open. Just shut your bloody gob when chewing. I can't watch footy anymore because the chewing gives me the rage.

Misuse of apostrophes, particularly in signs for businesses.

There's a road near us that I avoid driving down whenever possible, due to the roadside sign advertising Cream Tea's. I swear, one night I'm going to Tipp-Ex it out under cover of darkness, and 13yo DS (who might only have got 40% in his maths test but managed to correct the use of "DVD's" in one of the questions) will be a willing accomplice.

Closing the washing machin when it’s empty pisses me off. It gets mouldy and rots the seal (in my mind)

I start planning people's murders when they are eating. I know people can't help eating but it's annoying!

Sitting next to a colleague who has SNIFFED all fucking day. I have nearly rammed their head into their monitor. I know he can't help having a terrible cold, but fucking blow your fucking nose you disgusting fucker!!

yoghurt pot lid lickers

DH tuts at me if I give the dog a tin of food and don't immediately rinse the tin out. Which is fine, but there is usually a massive pile of washing up untouched to put it on - and if I mention this fact, I ABU. Given that I do most of the washing up, I do think he can fuck the fuck off with the bloody tin thing.