Life without a man

[Lana1z]

Okay so here goes...fully recovered from dh running off with the young secretary, tried the online dating scene for a good while but now at the point where I think I might buy several cats instead. Aibu to ask for reminders of all the reasons that this is a better option than continuing my search for a decent man?! (Replies only from the miserably married or wonderfully single 😂)

The TV remote is ALL MINE.

Just read the Relationships board.

I'm seeing someone but don't live together. I don't have to listen to aman constantly talking about himself or whinging about who upset him at work.
I can be totally selfish - and I am.

Starfish in the double bed... need I say more?

Good plan! Thanks!

Mm yep good compromise!

Four years in now, tried a bit of mild dating but honestly it wasn't for me. I have a wonderful time, do exactly what I like and have a brilliant relationship with my children. I really, really don't want a man in my life anymore.

And YY the remote is MINE! Get whippets if you can, sort of like cats but also dogs so don't treat you with disdain, I am their GOD.

The only mess in the house is mine or DS’s
I starfish the bed, then DS comes in for a snuggle. He doesn’t snore.
I have full control of the money. I don’t hide debts.
I can have what I fancy for tea.
I don’t have to deal with him ignoring me.
There is no one in the house to winge, bitch, belittle, complain or be lazy. Unless I feel like doing it.
Oh and I orgasm much more regularly without him here.
And it’s fucking fabulous.

I'm 6 months into singledom after a miserable marriage and loving it! The main perks for me are:

You can do what you like when you like, there is no one else to consider when making plans

You don't have to pretend to be interested in anyone else's boring interests

You can flirt as much as you like

It's lovely having your own space at home without having to live with someone else's clutter/ watch want they want on TV/ pick up their socks.

Also, I love treating myself that I normally would have loved to receive from a SO - nice dinners, perfume, jewellery. It feels very freeing not to be relying on anyone else to make me feel good!

Agreed! I’m between those two states at the moment - I would say satisfactorily separated! STBXH has been staying with weekend as his parents were visiting (i and the dc have a good relationship with them and I hope it continues) and bloody hell, even though I was miserable this week due to the reminder of Valentine’s Day, two days spent living with him again was the reminder I needed of why we’re getting divorced!!

When everyone left this evening I really relished the house being mine again, I can watch what I like on tv (when the kids are asleep that is, in the daytime they pick it!) and do my hobbies with no moaning, ego stroking etc.... i’m fine. Haven’t tried any sort of dating yet as it’s too early for me, but if you feel fine on your own then why change it?!

Happy singles here
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3171193-to-ask-if-anyone-else-hates-the-idea-of-being-in-a-relationship

Bed to myself, eat what I like, watch what i want, slob round in pyjamas as i please, hold parties and have friends round whenever or see nobody at all.

Not having to explain myself in any and every sense. I can just be and it's fabulous.

Thanks everyone 😆

I found these on the poke today, from the 1890s I think.

brilliant! Notevilstepmother

Starfish in the double bed... need I say more? Come on now! She's planning on getting 5 cats. You're not trying to tell me that a single man in the bed takes up more room than a cat, are you? Let alone 5 cats.

Been single for over 10 years and I love it. I have never lived with anyone, but by not entering into a relationship I have no one who demands a great deal of my time and attention. He can't get huffy that I would choose to spend time with my female friends instead of him. I also never feel pressured into sex anymore. Saying no to anything I don't want has become far easier.

I never have to face that moment of sinking disappointment when I realise the man I'm dating is actually 2 toddlers standing on each others shoulders.

I have actually thought about this a lot, and now finally come terms with it. Once I leave DH , if I don't find someone that can measure up to my now high standards I don't mind being on my own forever with my DC.

I love my own company, whats there not to like?

I’m happy in a relationship but would also be happy single. One bitten...

You dont have to wonder if they are going to be nice to you or not?

It took me about a year to get over my breakup. But now, my god, I am very very over it! It's like a veil has been lifted and I look back in astonishment at all the compromises I made ...
No guilt trips for seeing my friends
I eat what I fancy
I buy clothes without second guessing what he might think about them
No feeling like I should have sex cos I've left it too long, even if I don't feel like it
Doing what I want at weekends
Not resenting mess cos its my mess
Not being the house oracle "do we have cheese", "what are we doing on Wednesday" etc

I'm not sure I'll bother looking for a partner.

Don't have to shave anything
Never ever have to watch sport
Never have to listen to sport
Don't have to wait for the bathroom
Starfish across the whole bed

Teenage DDs playing, laughing and singing again.
No worrying about how drunk he will get.
Can cook and eat what we want.
A lot less laundry.
No sighing and silent criticism of what we like to watch and listen to
Peace and calm.

Am loving being separated.

No one's smelly farts to tolerate.
You can fart away to your hearts content!!

No mess to deal with - only yours.

Do what you.want when you want with no one else's needs to worry about.

No snoring.