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AIBU?

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Original poster

To start a thread praising the good men out there

84 replies

Chocywockydodahhhhhh · 18/02/2018 11:11

It’s so depressing to read about horrible men, especially since Joe Coxes Husband has turned out to be a absolute arsehole. I would like to mention two men

My dad- an absolute gentleman who has worked hard all this life in a hard manual job and is still doing it part time at the age of 72. He adores my mum and his kids and grandchildren. He can be a bit of a grumpy sod but he is a good man.

My husband- a great husband and father. I have epilepsy and fibromyalgia and he has supported my all the way through.
He works full time and did the majority of night feeds when DS was a baby as if I get over tired I fit. He will take DS out and let me rest if I have had a fit or am in pain without complaint. He cooks tea nearly night as I can’t use the cooker in case I fit (he won’t let me)
I developed epilepsy after we had been together for six months, I told him to leave but instead he got down on one knee and proposed. He says I am beautiful every day and says he is lucky to have me. I sometimes think I am a burden but he always reassures me
He is not perfect and can be a bit sulky at times but he is a good man and I am proud of him.

OP posts:
Honeycombcrunch · 18/02/2018 13:11

My DH is respectful, honest, kind and also manages not to be grumpy or moody. I think it's the basic minimum that every person should expect in a relationship whether they are male or female.

DisgraceToTheYChromosome · 18/02/2018 13:12

I'm a man, as most of the regulars know. Collectively, we're a bunch of dangerous fuckwits. I work in an industry where the attitudes expressed would get me into fights on a daily basis. Manchildish tits who abandon their kids, bellends who don't cook or clean, angry arseholes who hate it when a woman earns more or gets a shinier tractor unit. You do what you can, and luckily I've got a face that makes people shut up.

Lottapianos · 18/02/2018 13:13

'This is all a bit depressing! Praising men for being decent, ordinary adults.'

My thoughts exactly. I don't know whether to laugh or cry. Woop de doop for the men who can keep their hands to themselves and manage to lift a finger around the house Hmm Things that no woman has been praised for ever because they are bare minimum criteria for being a decent human being

Theglobe · 18/02/2018 13:13

Oh I just read the second page and realised it's gone South.

I’m amazed it took that long!

lookingforaline18 · 18/02/2018 13:14

I think it's nice to see a thread with positive comments about men for once.

If the people who are disgruntled about this thread don't like it, then go and start one about women and talk about your mums/aunties/sisters etc. Nothing stopping you.

Theglobe · 18/02/2018 13:18

It’s just a shame more men aren’t welcomed onto MN to balance out the debates.

However men get piled on until they don’t bother.

Mumsnet. By parents for parents (As long as your female).

StealthPolarBear · 18/02/2018 13:20

There are more male posters than you'd realise, unless they have dad in their name how can you tell?
And in what way would someone with a penis balance out the debates more?

Inseoir · 18/02/2018 13:26

Because we need to 'hear both sides' when it comes to men treating women like shit Stealth - after all, we can't think that we know about how we feel without men being there to correct us, can we?

I don't know if you noticed Theglobe, that the one identifiable male poster on the thread, Disgrace, has said far more negative things about men than anybody else?

SouthWestmom · 18/02/2018 13:38

FFS this is why men are always going to be in power and women always threatened and in the back foot.

Because for some reason bloody women feel the need to pipe up about all the normal men - we can't criticise the bloody bastard men without some 'context' and a reminder that NAMALT.

Men aren't some bottom of the food chain class of people in case you hadn't noticed.

SouthWestmom · 18/02/2018 13:39

It's sickening actually. We are finally at a stage when men are being called to account for shit behaviour and what happens? Women on here try to protect them, to make it less bad, to say 'hang on, there are lots of lovely men' . Why?

Doublevodka · 18/02/2018 13:49

George Michael? Didn't he do lots for charity and help people without telling everyone he'd done it?

I will be gutted now if someone tells me he was actually an arsehole.

HandbagKrabby · 18/02/2018 13:52

Because whether we are able to admit it to ourselves or not, we need the good men to stay on side because women are fucked if all men turn against us. So we play along and put up and tell everyone a man is utterly marvellous for putting some tea on or changing a nappy, because if those men don’t get their cookies they may say ‘fuck you’ and do nothing to help or even start actively harming us. Namalt obviously and some just do good out of the goodness of their hearts.

sparkleandsunshine · 18/02/2018 14:00

My fiancé, 10 years and he’s dealt with me getting fat and depressed, I had HG through pregnancy and every time I threw up in the loo I peed all over the floor, every single time he cleaned up, when I was 38 weeks he literally stripped me off and helped me in the shower then cleaned up my puddle.
Every single night feed, I would change our girls bum, while he went downstairs and made a bottle, then he would sit up with me while I fed her and chat, because he knew that I was so down about failing to breastfeed that I wanted to do all her bottles, but at the same time if I sat there in the dark and silence I would start to think again about how I was failing her by not feeding, so we sat and talked even though he was exhausted for work everyday.
He has been there for everything, is my biggest supporter, my absolute cheerleaderwhilst always telling me when I’m wrong and finding another option when I am stuck.
I love him

Robin233 · 18/02/2018 14:28

If the people who are disgruntled about this thread don't like it, then go and start one about women and talk about your mums/aunties/sisters etc. Nothing stopping you.

I agree . And I for one am enjoying reading about the positive stories on here.
Not all 'good' men have the time 'working' 70 hrs a week, or the ability to some of these things. A good man is worth his weight in gold - as any single woman will tell you :)

Stmoritz · 18/02/2018 14:39

Rolling my eyes so hard at this thread

Poor, poor men are getting such a hard time at the moment! Quick let’s praise the ones that are doing SO well by not being violent and/or sexual predators

RedDogsBeg · 18/02/2018 14:43

It's not a case of not liking the thread it's a case of why is it necessary to elevate men for being nothing more than decent human beings? Why is the bar set so low for men? Most of what has been put forward on here about 'good' men is nothing exceptional or noteworthy and wouldn't even credit a mention when talking about worthy attributes of women.

Why do women believe men have such fragile egos that they have to be constantly massaged and praised so highly for behaving with basic human decency and kindness?

UpstartCrow · 18/02/2018 14:46

I'm not saying there are loads of lovely men. Most of the men in my family are abusive arseholes one way or another, but despite that 3 of them managed to raise themselves to be decent human beings.

FrankUnderwoodsWife · 18/02/2018 14:53

Jesus Christ, I am actually speechless!! This thread just goes to show how low some women's expectations are.

The fact you have to state that you married a decent man, who helps around the house, and is a good father makes me want to literally weep. Why would you expect ANYTHING less????

Shoxfordian · 18/02/2018 14:54

Well done to all the men managing not to emotionally, physically or sexually abuse women.

Hmm

Ffs

RedDogsBeg · 18/02/2018 14:58

It's shocking isn't it Frank?

AnimalBrain · 18/02/2018 15:04

Tbh I’d be willing to put money on it that there are things posters don’t know about all these “funny and caring” men that would change their tune.

I’ve worked among them for years (sweet, caring family men etc) and seen it all, unfortunately.

Shootfirstaskquestionslater · 18/02/2018 15:06

My boyfriend we have been together 6 months tomorrow I have anxiety and depression and he has stuck by me through the good times and the bad he's my rock my best friend and my soul mate he keeps me calm when I have a panic attack he helps me through everything. He has a heart of gold he would do anything for anyone he is a sweet loving kind caring man.

FrankUnderwoodsWife · 18/02/2018 15:21

@Shootfirstaskquestionslater, I am happy for you, but would you be in a relationship with, or stay with anyone who who gave you less than what your b/f currently offers you?? Why is he, acting like a thoughtful, loving human, deserving of praise? This should be normal, least expected, ways of behaving.....

Shoxfordian · 18/02/2018 15:30

This is just a thread version of #notallmen and it's nonsense.

Why does a man deserve praise for not being a shitbag? Surely this is minimum standards for a partner.

beluga425 · 18/02/2018 15:31

.