New neighbours moved in today

[MrsMcW]

New neighbours moved into the flat below mine this afternoon. My heart sank- they are three girls in their early-mid twenties, two of whom are students. Eight hours in and they are already throwing a massive party... music blaring through my floor and I've answered the front door 4 times to their friends because they can't hear their own doorbell over the music and so the friends rang mine instead.

AIBU to give it until midnight and then ask them to turn it down? My main worry is that I'm pregnant and due in 6 weeks- it's one thing keeping me up now but it will be a nightmare with a newborn involved too! If I turn a blind eye (and a deaf ear - if only) now, does it set a precedent going forward? Am I just being a boring cow ruining their fun? They've bought the flat (or rather, Daddy has) so I can't complain to a landlord.

Let it go once. Maybe a ‘guys that was pretty loud last night - I know you’ve just moved in but that’s not going to be happening every week right?’
If it happens again go and have a word with them
If it keeps happening call environmental health every single time. And the uni.

There is no comparison at all between a crying baby and amplified music. I’ve had neighbours so loud it makes the walls shake. It’s stressful, unpleasant are affects your quality of life. A baby crying doesnt even come close.

Whizbang & thecatsthecats

I'm all for reasonable negotiation and not behaving like twats. Unfortunately, when a person has very young children and is likely to be sleep-deprived, reasonable negotiation is quite obviously never going to require allowing another person to deprive them of even more sleep by thudding some sub-bass through the wall at night. Not even once, and certainly not regularly.

Some people - you included it seems - appear to have a blind spot on this point even though it is quite obviously extremely inconsiderate and selfish. Sleep-deprivation is a form of torture: did you know that? The bottom line is that a person is entitled to reasonable peace and quiet in their own home, and that applies all the time. I'm not a particularly light sleeper, so if I get woken up at night by someone else's music or some other kind of noise, it's clear that I am being unreasonably disturbed, and I will call noise control or the police (I have done both in the past).

To be honest, I think you both should try a bit harder to identity precisely what I have said that you disagree with. I'm not confused in the slightest about my legal rights. I have just the same legal rights as they do - not to be disturbed in my own home. I'm just rather more quick than I used to be to enforce them. That's because in my experience drunk people are generally not amenable to discussion. They'd rather talk about shite. If you are suggesting that my right to sleep at night is equal to another person's right to party, well you're simply wrong about that as a matter of law. And if you think that I don't permit the slightest incursion on my life as a one-off, well you're wrong about that as a matter of fact. I certainly wouldn't call noise control about a crying baby: their parents would have nothing but my sympathy.

I am talking about parties in houses or flats, which are a completely optional and avoidable cause of noise. If you want to make a massive racket at night, bugger off to a nightclub or a bar. If you live anywhere near a town, there will be plenty of choice, and if you don't, bugger off to a field instead.

We had this we our new neighbours (who we knew through a family connection and knew it wasn't going to be fun) . Our solution - babies are usually awake early, get your self dress, crank up the cranberries ad bugger off out. Our neighbours mates stopped coming after party 3 . . . .

I really feel for you. I had noisy, partying, student neighbours once (I was the ground floor flat and they had the 1st floor). It was incessant, and ultimately led to me having to move house. If I knocked the door they would always offer a big apology, but then a few minutes later the music would be turned back up. Often the parties lasted until 5 or 6am, and then I would have to get up for work at 7am.
They honestly won’t give a hoot if you complain though - young people having fun partying don’t tend to spend much time reflecting on the detrimenral impact they might have on their neighbours. Hopefully it will just be a one off, but if not, you have my full sympathy. X

i have the neighbours from hell. they party most Saturdays until 5.30 am and often wake us any other night of the week talking, stamping up the stairs, visitors hanging on the door and having arguments. I wouldn't let their friends in and I'd let them know if their music is too loud and report to landlord if they don't respect 11pm cut off. good luck dealing with them!

Start as you mean to go on. I was a student, but still was careful not to annoy the neighbours. Ask them to turn it down, after 11, phone the non emergency police number. They may never stop making a racket. 😀
You are pregnant, you don’t need the hassle for the next few years

To be fair, if you popped down to see them they could have had the decency to mention they were having people over. I lived in a block of 4 flats when I was at uni, 3 filled with students and 1 a professional couple who worked weekdays and partied weekends. There were always little notes getting posted through doors explaining which flat was having a party and that if it got too noisy just to come down/across and it would get sorted. Everyone's entitled to a party every now and then, seems like common courtesy to me to give other residents a heads up though.

I really don’t think you should say anything to them.

You need to remember that they will be within their rights to knock and complain every time your baby cries and wakes them in the night. (Whether unreasonable or not) they can also knock on your door every morning complaining that your baby has been loud all night/all day.

You really need to let it go and remember that your baby will be noisy and will disturb them regularly (even the most angelic baby will make some disturbance to neighbours)

I remember having houseparties every weekend when I was a student!

We had 4am party neighbours a few years ago. I made a wish their neighbours when they have young kids will be like that, too. Perhaps that was you .

Umm you can't really ask for peace for your baby when your baby crying is going to be something they will have to tolerate

yes you can

Babies win every time !
There is crying - of course but also the astonishingly bad taste in music during their early years. ('The Wheels on the bus' is not a hangover cure.)

Be nice to your neighbours and understanding of the noise. The goodwill is likely to be useful.

I live in a GFF so hear all upstairs in our purpose built but old flat. The day after the tenants neighbours moved in I knocked on the door to introduce myself and to let them know there's no soundproofing and that the owner had refused to address the original, loose creaking floorboards. They were cordial but still they still wake me nightly when they creak across the bedroom floor in the small hours! Nip it in the bud before you lose your temper, they probably haven't a clue you exist. Yet.

Oh Christ, the noise of my neighbours screaming 2 year old. The stupid baby voices to it at 7am on a Sunday morning, the crap that comes with it, CONSTANTLY.

Horrifying. You are a madwoman if you are complaining about these new tenants having a housewarming. I feel sorry for them. 'Heavily pregnant woman' my arse, you clearly think it is all about you.

Good luck with that.

You should watch the 2014 movie called Neighbours. Quite funny but maybe not that helpful to your situation.

We used to live in a flat that was full of singles or couples 5 per floor, we were the first to have a baby and if any of them ever had a party that got too loud we would just knock on the door or wall and they would turn the music down. Don't assume that they will not be reasonable if you just ask nicely.

Oh god I feel for you. We had a 23 year old move in above us. We had a toddler and a newborn and he would throw parties until 5am (and no I'm not exaggerating!) he was HORRENDOUS! I would ring his doorbell at 2am, 3am, and so on and he would ignore it. He then started having his cocaine delivered at all hours, we know because we could hear the exchange taking place outside our flat, he had such a loud voice! Lots of the neighbours complained so then he took to leaning out of his window, directly above ours and calling all the neighbours cunts!!! Oh my god it was awful. Thankfully he was renting and he was eventually kicked out.

I would let it slide tonight, let them have their house warming party but if they throw another in the next couple of weeks then I would complain to them, I would complain whilst the party is taking place and again the following day, after the party. It doesn't matter whether you own, rent or daddy bought it for you, ultimately when you live in a flat you have to respect your neighbours and try to get along.

We had a housewarming: it was friends over for afternoon, BBQ for dinner, no amplified music or music hear able outside the house. A few people chatting at chatting volume on the garden, then everyone had gone home by late evening.

Where I live it’s seen as deeply antisocial to inconvenience your neighbours. Maybe at midsummer or Valborg there will be harden prtoes butcthats everyone at the same time and people are generally considerate.

I agree completely with toad above. If you live in close proximity to others you need to be mindful of how your life affects them. No one expects monk like silence - footsteps, children playing, lawns being mowed, babies crying are all normal living noise. On MN I’ve seen threads where people are onbliviois to the fact that they are being antisocial by:

Fixing motorbikes on driveways
Revving high powered cars
Practising drums in a terrace
Music blaring over other people’s gardens
Kids kicking footballs against flat windows
‘The occasional party’ which ends up drip feeding to mean every fucking weekend.
Dogs barking all day shut in alone

And on, and on.

If your life noise is above the living noise level and impacting your neighbours you’re an antisocial bastard who should be exiled to Rockall in winter

Just as a footnote our nightmare neighbour didn't work so would throw his parties any night of the week!

harden prtoes ? Garden parties

I would leave it this time, but make a note of the date, time of noise, type of noise and duration, in case this problem escalates and you need to report it to the council.

Hopefully it's just a one-off...

I had same situation as you a couple years ago. I still live next door to my neighbors who every single weekend had a party. I started to worry about this while I was pregnant. A few months ago, when my LO was 4 months old, we thought someone was breaking into our house at 3am. It turned out it was a former roommate of one of the guys who lived there kicking their door in because nobody was home. It scared us so bad that the next day DH went over there and told them they woke us up and we were scared for our lives. He also mentioned the weekly parties. The owner of the unit is the father of one of the current residents. My husband found his phone number, called them up and told them everything. They apologized for their son and ever since that day we haven't heard a peep out of them.

I would just suggest to be friendly and let them know that they are being a bit loud. People can surprise you sometimes. I know when I get annoyed and angry in these situations I usually expect the other person to be uncooperative and angry back.

Many years ago I lived somewhere else where my neighbors played loud music all the time. Up until 5am on work nights. I would go over there and ask them to turn it down. I would bang on the walls when that didn't work. One time I even yelled "YOU ASSHOLES!" as loud as I could when one of them started playing his guitar at 4am and surprisingly he stopped playing after that . These neighbors had what seemed like floor to ceiling speakers. My furniture would shake. I even called the cops a few times and that still didn't stop them.

I hope for your sake OP you have cooperative neighbors. Some people are the worst and others don't want to make enemies with their neighbors.

You could contact L.A. environment services as all the to-ing and fro-ing is creating a nuisance e.g. noise. Also is there is a load of them living in such a small house it could need to be classed as multiple occupancy and need all the appropriate certifications. Never too late and if you can get any other neighbours on your side your case would be much stronger.

Hope party's over now :-)

Was there another party tonight OP?