To actually despise the school run....

[Sophisticatedsarcasm]

Ive been sitting here after I’ve finished work thinking how amazing it feels to not have to do the school run . No dealing with the cliche mums who stand and judge others ( if your gonna do it maybe don’t do it so obviously) or the ones with pushchairs who annoyingly block the path with other mums because they just need to have that little mothers meeting right in everyone’s way because go forbid the extra 10 secs it takes to move out of the way so others can get past.
Or the Mum who lets the little one ram into peoples legs on his little trike and not say anything to him. I don’t miss the loud one who talks really loud so everyone can hear her business, even over my headphones with full volume rock.
Anyone else hate the school run..... I’ve still got another 6 years of it 😭😭

Generally everyone is incredibly nice at our school gates. It is a very small school and they release recep, yr1, yr2 at 10min intervals so there is never an enormous gaggle of mums. Not so sure about yr3+ as haven't done it yet and they finish later.

I notice one or two people sit in their cars until the kids appear - that's fine, its up to them whether to be sociable or not!

I used to like it with DC1. Found everyone very friendly and welcoming.

Now we’re onto DC2 and the parents in his class do my head in! So many PFBs. So much judgement when they want their special snowflakes to wear their coats and mine rips off all his layers as soon as he’s out of the gate. He’s always running around and permanently hot so I don’t care. But apparently it sets a bad example. Well - you parent your kids and I’ll parent mine. I’ve an older one who’s turned out ok so I’m not too worried about my technique, thanks!

And then there’s stalker mum. I actually started a thread about her last night. She’s a nightmare! Accosts me at every pick up to drone on and on and fucking on about her boring day. I do not care! She was made redundant and is very clearly not used to spending the day alone with no one big and important listening to her wonderful ideas. Sometimes I pretty much ignore her and she just follows and keeps on chatting. It’s so embarrassing! And she openly slags off the teachers in her huge honking voice when some of them are my friends from a former role and I actually agree with what they’re doing. Just cos she can’t be arsed to read the newsletter or get her kids to school on time doesn’t mean I’m in agreement that the teachers have a problem!

Aah - that feels better. Can’t wait for a couple of years’ time when both kids will come out of school in the same place and so I can stand with the parents of DC1’s friends again. At the mo it’s very hard to avoid stalker due to where the little ones leave from.

And don’t get me started on the twats who drive like loons, particularly those who live locally but believe they’ll melt in the rain. I’ve actually had people tell me I shouldn’t make my DC walk when it’s wet! It’s all of 5 minutes and takes longer in the car because of all the unnecessary drivers...

I don't mind it, I'm only a 5 minute walk away so it's no driving stresses other than dodging all those who do drive and seem to lack common sense. Tbh I'm not really interested in talking to anyone, I have 3 kids all in classrooms dotted around the school and couldn't be further away from each other so I'm usually just racing between them trying to get the kids in a timely manner.

Tbh I can honestly say in my DD,s year there is just one clique that slags everyone off. Mainly 2 of them and others come and go. A few friendship groups who have mums that are really nice. In the other 2 years there are a few more however I don’t pay too much attention but they are loud mouths so can hear them across the playground. If you like the school run well good on you. I just can’t bring myself to enjoy it. There’s always something that pisses me off.

Another thing is I always bring my daughter a little snack because guaranteed the first words out of her mouth are ‘I’m hungry’ . There are few other parents who do this aswell although most of the time I give mine to my daughter as we are walking to meet my DS. Ive heard a few people be like ‘it’s not fair on the other children’
I’m sorry but if you can’t be bothered to bring a snack for your kids that ain’t my problem but I sure ain’t feeling guilty about it. If she does have it in the playground she usually shares with her friends anyway.

Yanbu. I stopped doing the pm one in sept 2016 and most of the a.m ones in Jan 2017.
Most times my DD doesn't want me to walk her. We live 3 mins away, no road for her to cross.
I absolutely despised it. Traffic is shit along my road, they park everywhere on the grass, block driveways. The kids drop sweet litter - at breakfast time 🙄 The bus blocks the road when it stops outside and the hordes of buggy pushers and their tribes seem to expect the use of the entire pavement. Like fuck am I walking on the busy road, move over we can have half each. Ignorant fuckers.
Then there's the 4 y.o on scooters. 🙄Or bikes with stabilisers, seemingly without brakes. I'm all for kids being active, they love their bikes. But when space is at a premium, cars parked terribly by those who should stick to smaller cars due to their lack of spatial awareness, leave the bikes at home.
Then the muppets who block the entrance whilst gasbagging like Harpies tearing shreds of some poor person who happens to not be in the clique. Move over and turn it down. It's like Jeremy Kyle - in a nice school.
It always pisses down at 3pm. My kid was always last out.
I only did it so I could see her 😉
I'm so glad it's over and I won't be doing it again.

No I don't hate the school run. I love it.

We have a 10 minute walk and during that I chat to the girls and they have my undivided attention.

I pay no attention to what anyone is doing and if I want to stop and chat I do,

However I work and I can see how I might over analyse it if I was at home. I would probably fret about who I was meeting, was i part of the right group etc etc

Thats obviously nonsense but I have no doubt that this is where I would end up if I was a SAHM - hence why I need to work

I'm a childminder and find it quite stressful it has t be said.

BUT the only day I don't have other children, I love it, especially in the summer, chat to my girls, get an ice cream on the way home, and just enjoy the moment.

All too soon they won't want me walking anywhere near them!

I neither like nor dislike it. It's just something I have to do as part of my daily routine. Traffic doesn't bother me as I walk, so don't really notice it. Couldn't care less about cliques either, I'm not at all bothered about what people I don't know think about me. Only time I don't like it is waiting for the gates to open when it's pissing down with rain.

I don't hang about anyway as I have to go straight to work after I drop DS off. We only live a 10 minute walk from the school so it's over pretty quickly.

Just chill out and talk to people. They're only human

I despise it.

Theres a narrow stretch of pavement that mums will not make their kids walk in front/out the way of people coming opposite direction. These kids either run into me or I end up half walking in the road dodging inconsiderate yellow line parkers making the path even narrower.

This also happens on the steps going into school. Blocked by mums trying to get buggies down - there is a safer, walkable route out of school that requires walking around - yet these mums wait at the top of the steps (at least 10 steps) for someone to help them blocking the exit and causing a backlog.

Parents not using the lollipop man and darting out a little way up the road into traffic with their kids. Seriously making the traffic worse. Use the lollipop man. He's excellent and helps keep traffic flowing by getting folk across in groups obvs AND kids safe.

parking... honestly the amount of bitching I hear walking in of an afternoon from parents caught parking on double yellows right out school gates and the fixed penalty notices they give just pisses me off. Park in the car park 5 minutes walk away and save your self a few hundred in fine. I could 10 cars with fines last time the traffic wardens were out. I so wanted to high five them.

The cliques. It is awful at school. You have TAs and parents who work in the class with their kids (not acceptable!!) who make snap judgements about a child's behaviour and it spreads like wildfire and your kid ends up on the shit list and never invited to any parties. The parents judge you too.

I’m not a huge fan of it I have to say

Haha yes...why does it ALWAYS rain at 3pm?!

patchworkcat I'm with you. I don't get it. I have a group of fairly good friends that I've made through our kids being in the same class, we go out for coffee sometimes after dropping them off. This is not at all cliquey and open to anyone, although obviously it's a lot of the same people who go each time as others are going straight to work etc. There are a whole load of other parents I know slightly and will say hello to, or have a conversation with in the playground. Never ever known anyone to bitch about other parents or there to be any kind of trauma.

As far as I can tell everyone is doing the same thing, either chatting to friends, or just waiting for their kids (looking at their phone!) and then going home.

At our infant school the mums in our class all got on really well (to the extent of a big group of us going camping in the summer) and now we are at juniors and don't see so much of each other, I miss the social aspect of the school run. I know quite a few people who say they miss going to the school once their kids are in year 5 or 6 and walking on their own because they never get to see other parents.

Some of the parents at my DC school park like twats at both sides. They too park on the pavement, the worse part is some of them live nearer to the school than me. I always think lazy fuckers. My DP takes me in the car if he’s home and only if it’s bad weather, so like once a month. Am I evil to laugh in the summer when the traffic wardens are out in full force and I see them giving out tickets 😈 I literally walk into the school laughing to myself. I must look like a right weirdo but not really bothered because it’s literally like karma has struck 😊

I'm pretty sure 'cliques' are in the eye of the beholder and are actually just groups of people who happen to know each other and unsurprisingly chat. Maybe if you stopped hating them for a moment and went and said hello you would discover this. Most mums (in fact most women) I know will literally chat to anyone.

I remember attending the end of school concert at my DS's primary. Many of the mother's were wailing around me, crying, competing who could look the most devastated - I honestly felt so delighted knowing I would never see them again.

Apart from those who stand in the way with their buggies which is annoying, I don't recognise this at all at our school gates. Then again, I work so rarely have to do it. When I do, its generally a cheery hello to the parents i know, pick up/drop off my DD and go home.
Maybe i'm lucky with our school or I just don't pay attention to what others are doing.

Not having to get up in the morning - now that i can agree with.

It's 50/50 mums and dads here who do pickup so feels uncliquey because of that... plus we queue up so no chance for groups to form. If I fancy a chat I just chat with someone in the queue, if I don't then I will just read my phone like half of them do. It's a lovely walk too, over a bridge then through some woods. No stress here.

They are just people. then my nightmare comes true and who do I see one afternoon whilst picking up my daughter from nursery last year - I think you are assigning too much importance to a fellow parent. Is it possible that quite a bit of the drama happens in your imagination? Your nightmare's only crime seems to be staring.

The cliques may well just be parents who have a chat. Like you, I am an old hand at the school run now. I have never encountered these cliques, but there are parents at our school who believe they spotted cliques. I wonder if they are natural clique-formers and therefore clique-spotters.

I don’t really love the pressure of being in the same place day in, day out for years so I think generally that’s why I dislike School runs.

I have done the chit chat with the other parents for years and then years of sitting in the car a street away until the bell goes and not talking to anyone.

It can be a pain but once they go to secondary and you don’t know any other parents or do any of the chit chat you can feel quite nostalgic that your then a bit more redundant in your kids school life.

My youngest starts school this year so I will try to treasure our chats on the journey a bit more this time. School run primarily is about my child. Other human contact during that is a side bonus.

I find this whole thread really baffling. 3 kids here and have done school runs at 3 different schools so far, and have never seen anything remotely like this. I actually love the school run. We walk, it's a chance to have a chat with the DS's and usually a bit of a laugh together and give them my undivided attention. Then I enjoy passing the time of day and having a chat with the other parents at drop off/ pick up. No cliques or bitching as far as I can see. yes, there are some parents who are friends, and I'm friends with some of them, but surely no one can possibly object to that?

I think there is a bit of internalised misogyny going on here. It's the way people (often women themselves) often talk about groups of other women- cliques/ bitches/ the mommy wars etc, where I don't think the same language would ever be applied to groups of male friends/ colleagues etc.

..mums who stand and judge others (if you’re gonna do it maybe don’t do it so obviously) what..like doing it on Mumsnet? 😂

I do the school run one or two days a week which is a nice balance. When I had to do it every weekday it surprised me how much I disliked it!

No cliques at my kid's school and it's certainly not just mums, loads of dads, grandparents, etc. I've three children at the same school and my only reason for not wanting to do the school run is the cold and wet. From year 3 onwards children are allowed to leave school by themselves so I've only got one more school year before I can just sit in the car and wait. Which will be lovely in winter!

Ds has been to two Primary schools one small and one large.

The small primary was hellish during the school run, there were definite cliques and I loathed every minute. I have had no issues at the much larger primary, school run is a breeze and has been for 4 years.

I really do think ‘school run hell’ depends on the size of the school, the luck of finding like minded parents etc