To ask if you actually enjoy family meal times?

[LittleLionMansMummy]

Every bloody Sunday it's the same.

7yo ds slouches, picks and can't wait to leave the table (whatever is cooked), dh nags him about slouching, picking and not sitting still, 14mo dd whinges or cries or screams her way through or slings her cutlery around.

It's all got too much this evening with them all niggling at each other constantly. I've thrown my toys out the pram just now and told them I'm not doing it any more (by which I mean sitting down to eat as a family, not cooking). It's so stressful. I'm sure other families manage it, but I hate family meal times and can't be bothered any more.

I love all sitting down together - partner and 2 stepchildren. Perhaps this is because we only have them half of the week.

My stepson loves anything I cook, however my step daughter will only eat plain food - chicken, rice, pasta, veg, no sauce etc. I let my DP deal with that and just enjoy my food!

I've only really just started implementing family meal times in the last couple of months, and I try to get everyone sitting down together by 6pm. Prior to this, DS's (6 & 3) would sit and eat cereal/sandwich/whatever whilst watching the ipad, whilst I'd do a dinner for DH and I to eat after they were in bed.

Now I've pushed dinner times to 6pm and have always meal planned so that we can all sit down together even if we're eating different things. The kids aren't allowed to watch anything at the table now. Yesterday I made beef stew and we all sat down together and it's only took a week before they stopped griping about lack of weetabix and ipad. Now we chat and generally listen to the kids make jokes about farts...

We also bribe them with a pudding so they know they have to finish or eat a certain amount of mouthfuls before they're allowed a treat.

Once they're done, they have to load their dish into the dishwasher and then come and wait for the rest of us (or each other more often) before they can get their dessert.

And they must always ask to be excused from the table.

I was brought up eating family meals and it's still one of the joys of my life when I go back to the UK to see my family. I want my boys to enjoy the same thing.

I'm not hugely strict about them, if there are nights where DH or I are doing different things then fine, but I always want the default to be eating together at the table.

Yes, I like family mealtimes but that’s because I like my DH and D.C. and we all have good table manners.

Eating with other people’s children is not always so much fun though...

What depressing reading.

I make an easy meal. We all eat it. It's nice. Kids are 3 and 7.

At the table, where we talk about our day and play a bit of a boardgame, do a bit of crafting after ds and I have put the dishwasher on. Not smug, just fairly basic I'd have thought!

I do now but it was a long time coming. I'm glad I persevered though because if I'd given up when they were younger I doubt we'd be having the lovely sociable dinners we have now thy're in their teens.

Your 7yo probably dreads Sunday lunch as much as you do so let him eat his later. Free from the stress of his father’s nagging.

We eat when the children are in bed apart from the odd Sunday roast, partly because dh doesn’t get in until 6.30pm and the littlest ones eat at 4pm, but mainly because eating with them at the moment gives us both indigestion! I envisage all sitting round the table together every night in about two years

Some of your DHs/DPs sound horrendous. No table manners, going on and on at the kids, getting arsey at having to sit at the table like a good boy while everyone else finishes...

I bet a lot of kids behave better.

Yes, I do. It’s usually just me and dts about 6:30. No TV, time for a chat.

Never really thought about it tbh, it’s just the done thing in our house, all meals are eaten at the table.

We don’t argue or the kids don’t fight over food, kids are only allowed to leave if they ask.

I love family mealtimes and we generally have at least one meal a day together, even if that's often breakfast. We have had phases of the dc squabbling but we've moved them apart which has helped.

There was a suggestion I took from facebook which really helped - ask has anyone done anything kind today? Anything brave? has anyone failed at anything today? My dc, plus any visiting dc, love this!

I don't have children of my own but I can't stand eating with my sister's kids. Their table manners are appalling and they expect people to wait on them. Dreadful. And I don't feel like I can let rip about it.

Good on paper - usually a bit shit in reality. A bit like reading with your child. It's one of those rose tinted parenting situations you fantasise about while pregnant and excited with your first DC before you know any better.

We do have lunch together at the weekend (DCs are 6 and 2). Light bites. No way am I slaving over a roast dinner only for it to be largely ignored or chucked about.

DP and I eat our evening meal after they've gone to bed. I like to relax and drink wine with my meal not referee/clean/ nag constantly. But it's not really practical to eat together in the week anyway because of nursery/work/ commute/after school club etc.

Having said all that they are usually not too bad when we go out to eat and will sit and eat quite nicely.

We don't do tables. There's no room for one in my house and I'd far rather sit and watch Attenborough documentaries or Adventure Time with my children as we munch though a jacket potato

i know it's important to some people; not to us.

Actually we have never eaten at a table, always off our knees in front of the TV, and yet my kids are a joy to take to restaurants because they enjoy the experience, never having been exposed to the critical misery of my father at the dinner table!

P is obsessed with and completely inflexible about eating at the table. He even insists that DS2 sits at the table with a plate to eat a bloody cereal bar as a snack.

So when he’s not here we have picnic lunches and teas in the living room while watching a film.

Once I have my own house, the boys and I will mostly eat at the table. But not if we don’t want to. And no one is going to get all sulky because a crumb or two made its way into the (wooden) floor in the living room.

I enjoy them, but have a very strict ‘no complaining about the food’ policy’ which helps. Fine if you don’t like it, you don’t have to eat it (there won’t be an alternative option though!), but just leave whatever it is on the side of your plate without comment!

We have always eaten as a family at the table. I can’t say that it has always been harmonious especially with young DC but it is mostly enjoyable now they are older. It is really nice just to have that short time each day when everything else stops and we all sit together. Sometimes there’s conversation, sometimes there’s not much of we are all tired and hungry but that’s ok too.

I love it. It's noisy and a little chaotic, but we hear all sorts of funny things from our 3 DCs. Twins age 4 and a toddler age 2. It's one of the best times of the day getting to sit around and have family conversation, even if it's just lots of stories about 4 year old playground antics.

Ugh, no not at all. It's probably my least favourite time of the day.

Our kids are 5 and 3. The 3 year old particularly exerts her limited control over life and refuses to eat ANYTHING no matter what it is. I feel like we spend half the evening encouraging, cajoling, counting bites, bribing and threatening to get them to eat even half their dinner. We used to be more laid back (eat what you want to, your choice) but they'd just literally eat nothing, night after night.

This too shall pass, right?

We eat together as a family 1-2 evenings per week and always have Sunday lunch at my mum's or out somewhere. DH works later on the other evenings so I feed the kids first and eat with him later. Generally, I love these family mealtimes. Both kids (4 & 7) love their food, alhough DS1 is pretty conservative in his tastes. Mangers are important to us and neither child would dream of getting up from the table as this is something we've instilled since they were tiny. When they've finished they say, 'May I get down please? Thank you for my tea.'

Was at a party not long ago and was told by another mum that I was very 'lucky' that DD sat at the table so well. 😡

I also agree with PPs that we don't discuss food. I was brought up to believe that the only appropriate comment about a meal is, 'Isn't this delicious?'. Anything they really don't like is left. Can't bear listening to endless whinging about not liking baked beans/sweet corn/ whatever else.

We're always eaten at the table every mealtime. I don't remember it ever being stressy, though I'm sure we've had our moments. We have a no screens at the table rule and don't have a telly in the kitchen. We all eat the same thing, with minimum whinging (make yourself a butty if you don't like it) and sit and chat about our day and the world in general (kids are between 11 and 24 now).

Apparently some of the kids' visiting friends boyfs/girlfs have ribbed them a bit that we are cute and old fashioned. My kids just think it's a bit bizarre to go to their houses and eat a ready meal off your knee in the living room and not chat on as a family.

MichaelBendfaster I'm the one who mentioned the arsey DH. He blames his habits on his parents and his mums not too good cooking. He is one of four and they had to eat everything in order to get pudding, he says the only way to force down the food was eat it as fast as possible.
The first time I had Christmas dinner at their house I was gobsmacked it was over in minutes, I came from a chew everything a million times and put your knife and fork down between mouthfuls family. The feeling of them all staring at me willing me to finish was most uncomfortable.