To think my Drs have deliberately refused to see me

[TheCatsPaws]

Background: long term clinical depressive with severe anxiety. Occasional diazepam user. I have never abused or overdosed on diazepam, or any other drug. Was stable until I recently had four miscarriages in a row, which has caused me to develop flashbacks, nightmares and for my depression to come back.

I went to my GP last week for some diazepam and was told flat out no, as I am a “risk” I’ve used it for nearly 10 years, about three times a year. I was instead given Zopiclone, which caused a horrible hallucination of blood running down my hands and sent me hysterical (my DP had to restrain me).

I threw the Zopiclone out and used my last few diazepam these last few days. I ran out yesterday and asked for a telephone appointment. The Dr never rings. I ring up and tell them. They say I’m still on the list. I ring at 5:30 and they say I’m still on the list.

6 I ring and it’s closed.

Now I have no way of getting my medicine and I’m going to have fucking nightmares and panic attacks when I sleep. AIBU to think this was deliberate? They just don’t want to prescribe it to me for some reason.

Fuck me, are posters actually reading OP posts correctly? Or maybe been at the wine since 2pm?!

I think you need to go to out of hours and see if you can see a MH professional tbh.

I had an interesting reaction to Citalopram

I take it about three times a year. I’m not addicted, I had surgery two days ago and would like to recover with peaceful sleep...

have a glass of wine and chill out

I'm a little annoyed tonight and having a glass or two of wine to chill out.

I don't think a glass of wine is going to cut it for the OP, I think your post minimises what she has/is gone/going through.

If only it were that easy.

Adding wine to ADs probably isn’t best idea tbh.

OP it might be worth trying one of those online docs but they might say no, plus are you near a chemist?

Your doc doesn't sound as if they are taking your situation seriously with the PTSD, I gather this quite common with miscarriage?

a glass of wine and chill out ffs

They aren’t taking me seriously imo :(

what about ringing your local crisis team? They should be able to see you over the weekend and would be more suited to helping you than a gp.

My crisis team only does phone calls. I had them involved last week.

OPI feel your pain.

I have PTSD and was prescribed benzos quite frequently. Then they started cutting them so I was only getting a few a month, that I would use to help me get one fairly good sleep a week.

I also have anxiety, depression, fibromyalgia and a neuro condition similar to MS.

I get diazepam twice a year to get to the dentist - I'm terrified, but make myself go.

I also get 5 days' worth when I get a back spasm. They do say they've stopped prescribing for this, but I've tried everything else and nothing else relaxes the spasm. The spasms are linked to the neuro condition.

I did have what I thought was a great relationship with my old GP until I asked her to be referred to a specialist unit for my condition when my neuro was pushing for a lumbar puncture. Since then she refuses to see me or take calls/call back and won't look at me when she passes me when I'm at the GP.

It's humiliating and extremely annoying. My condition could cause blindness overnight, yet if she's the only one on duty that day, I don't get a call back.

I would never treat others like that. I know they're under strain (though our GPs all work part-time rotas and farm out to locums on the weekends, so I can't see a huge amount of strain there tbh), but common decency to people who are worried and/or vulnerable would be nice.

Keep trying, OP. You need to be seen to see if you do have PTSD - then you need proper help.

There was a chat on the feminist boards about trauma relating to women's health and how it's not taken seriously

When I had PTSD it was related to something else, an external event, and it was taken very seriously. I honestly think there's a link - like there's certain things women are just expected to cope with, often around reproductive issues.

Also I think there's a "hysterical woman" element, a colleague was once refused diazepam twice, third time took her DH in and was given them. Presumably because her owner had granted permission.

Whenever you talk to someone who has issues getting it prescribed, it's often about ten pills a year they're talking about.

They are concerned that diazepam can be addictive. My DD was prescribed it during pregnancy, that was 2 years ago, she went back and asked for some as she was having a really difficult time, was told 'no'.
The crisis team got involved a short time after, and the psychiatrist from that team advised the GP to give her diazepam, so I think it has to be advised, but the crisis team should be able to advise the GP?

Most GP practices are learning from the death of a woman in her 30s who had multiple analgesia prescribed and then died

Diazepam is not an analgesic.

It sounds like you are physically addicted to the diazepam, Suggest you try citalipram. For now, have a glass of wine and chill out

No, it really doesn’t. I’m sure the NHS could save loads by telling PTSD sufferers to chill,out and drink wine .

💐OP. I am so sorry you are going through this, over and over again. I had something approaching PTSD after DH was in ICU, and a private counsellor helped so much. She was well worth the £40 ph, but I am fortunate enough to be able to afford that.

Thank you everyone who commented. I’m so sorry for everyone else who’s had similar experiences :(

OP in case it makes you laugh - I know it's a long shot but just in case - last time time a gp said "it can be addictive" I had to bite my tongue to stop myself saying "honey, it's not THAT good, didn't you go clubbing in the 90s".

Before anyone jumps on that, I didn't take recreational drugs then, I just really wanted to say that!!

OP I hope you get a proper diagnosis and some proper sleep. I really feel for you. In terms of a proper PTSD diagnosis I wonder if it might help to take someone with you to your next appointment if possible.

I'm so sorry op. I don't have any advice but I have pnd and the gp thinks I probably have PTSD as well although I haven't had a proper diagnosis. I have had a traumatic miscarriage similar to yours and 3 traumatic births (and 2 non traumatic ones). I have nightmares so bad for the week before my period that sometimes I'm scared to go to sleep. I don't know if the nightmares are hormone related or if it's because I'm scared of getting pregnant again. Gp is sympathetic but a bit useless really.

Poor OP

I can’t even contemplate what you have experienced and it’s no suorise you are having a set back

I don’t however think that this drug is the answer for you . Nor is alcohol for some people or cocaine for others

There are better ways to get through this (and more appropriate drugs)

I would suggest saying

• I had 4 miscarriages
• I have long term MH issues
• I am struggling to get through this please please help me

I'm so sorry you're struggling TheCatsPaws

I was prescribed diazepam following a mental health breakdown last year, a 3 day prescription via an A and E doctor/crisis team, then a further 2 weeks prescribed by a psychiatrist. It was explained that the prescription was only a short term measure and I wasn't to take it for more than two weeks.

My GP once gave me a week's supply for anxiety attacks but only on the back of the psychiatrist's report, if I hadn't had that I very much doubt she'd have prescribed it. I asked a few months later if I could have another week's prescription or some Zopiclone to at least help me sleep, but she rather bluntly told me no, they were 'false friends', so no prescription for either that time.

Are you taking any antidepressants at all? Can you access the crisis team? I found them to be brilliant when I had my breakdown.

Alternatively download Tor and get it off the darknet. Joking aside I think it’s that hard to get those drugs these days . And sadly that’s for a reason . I think your GP need to help you and maybe an email or some family advice might help them open up

OP I hope you get a proper diagnosis and some proper sleep. I really feel for you. In terms of a proper PTSD diagnosis I wonder if it might help to take someone with you to your next appointment if possible

I would like a proper diagnosis too because I really need support. I feel like I am so afraid of my son getting hurt because of these nightmares that it’s aggecting what I can do, where I go.

111 have made me an out of hours appt in an hour. I am not hopeful but maybe they can prescribe it. Who knows.

Oh you have an appointment, I'm crossing everything for you.

Good luck with your appointment OP

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I had a similar issue with my dad this week. At this point I have a solicitor handling our complaints and a case worker with our MP who makes calls to get things moving when we encounter the 'computer says no' circus of bullshit.

Seriously consider complaining to PALS and emailing your GP/attending a clinic.