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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask when did you first feel like an adult?

104 replies

ArgfromTowie · 07/02/2018 21:45

I saw in the paper about 50 signs you are an adult , so just wondering when you first felt like one

I think the first time was getting my first job and obviously pay check

OP posts:
Apocalyptichorsewoman · 07/02/2018 22:25

My Mum and Dad died. But it wasn't until 6 months later when my only sister died that I felt like an adult. Am divorced and single cos ex-dh met someone else so am naturally fairly self sufficient.

But nothing compared to standing at the graveside of my sister at her funeral with my mum and Dad buried underneath her ( all wearing fluffy socks in their coffins Blush ) that I felt utterly alone and grown up.

KC225 · 07/02/2018 22:27

When asked how would you like to pay?
And I replied 'By cheque please.'

DramaAlpaca · 07/02/2018 22:28

I can't remember, being an adult happened very gradually. It could've been when I bought my first house, got married or had a child. I suppose I must be one by now seeing as I'm 50 something & have adult children myself. Don't always feel like it though.

teaandtoast · 07/02/2018 22:29

When I was pegging out my first baby's clothes on the line for the first time. I felt so grown up.

rubberducker · 07/02/2018 22:35

When I got my first le creuset pan! I was married, with kids and a profession by the time I could afford them but still makes me feel grown up when I use them.

Summerisdone · 07/02/2018 22:36

I’m 28, single handedly raise and care for a three year old, run a home by myself and have always had a job since 14, yet I still don’t feel like an adult.
I asked DM this just recently actually as I was wondering why I still don’t feel like an adult and she told me she still doesn’t either (she’s 46) Grin

I do sometimes notice the difference in myself when I think of immature things I did, said or thought when I was younger, but I suppose people 40+ would also feel like that when they think back to being 28 🤷🏻‍♀️

FloydOnThePull · 07/02/2018 22:37

I'm 35 and last year I moved jobs and got the title 'UK head of "thing I do"' and I am in the company share scheme. I felt like an adult the first month I got my share statement.

really I'm just a tall toddler with a pension and a mortgage

torthecatlady · 07/02/2018 22:41

@ftmtb oh god, the "lady" comment gets me too! Grin I'm like "When did I become a grown up?!"

LyricalGangster · 07/02/2018 22:45

When I wrote an email to the council (about bin provision in the local area) and they then installed some bins. I still walk past 'my' bins and smile and feel very grown up.

thegreylady · 07/02/2018 22:46

Not yet...I am 73

HerdofAntilop · 07/02/2018 22:51

When I ate dairy milk for breakfast and there was no one there to tell me off (at 21 I believe).

UpstartCrow · 07/02/2018 22:53

Going into a shop to buy a mattress. That was several years after I left home, but up til then I'd always had shared furnished accommodation. I rented a whole flat and had to furnish it.

SergeantFredColon · 07/02/2018 22:53

When we bought a barbecue. That felt very grown up! As you’d be having people round for dinner instead of just going to pub.

SergeantFredColon · 07/02/2018 22:54

I was 37

RaininSummer · 07/02/2018 22:55

I still don't really feel like a proper grown up at 55 although it struck me recently that there are now only two of the generation above me in my family left. When my Dad died it was a rite of passage but I think I will only really feel it when I reach the top of the tree and become a family elder as it were .

Thesmallthings · 07/02/2018 22:58

32 and still don't.. completely lost and over whelmed with life and responsibility.

Then I spend time with 19 years old and then I'm like yup I'm an adult.

BarbarianMum · 07/02/2018 23:00

Im not sure I have yet. Maybe for a few moments when my dad was diagnosed with dementia.

I think it will be when my mum dies. So hopefully not til I'm in my 70s.

Busybusybust · 07/02/2018 23:00

When I had my first child

Someoneasdumbasthis · 07/02/2018 23:01

Still looking round for the adulty adult.

confusedhelpme · 07/02/2018 23:04

When I had my DS at 36

witherwings · 07/02/2018 23:06

When we got our dogs and I realised I was wholly responsible for keeping them alive and healthy. I was 28.

TheRealCurlySue · 07/02/2018 23:08

I have move out, moved house since then as well, got married and had 3 DCs but still don't really feel like an adult. Waiting for it to hit me one day!

XmasInTintagel · 07/02/2018 23:10

When my parents died. I was 36.

Yes, for me it was when my mum died, in my 40's (dad died many years before).
The vicar remarked that I might feel I was now an orphan, and I realised I didn't really feel left alone in that way, I felt I had my own family now, and was capable of handling it all.

tellitermine · 07/02/2018 23:10

When going to visit my parents stopped feeling like going home. I was about 30 and suddenly realised I felt more relaxed in my own home than theirs.*

^*
This.
By this time I owned my own home, had two children and was married.

My step dad dying and my mother becoming dependent on me also made me grow up.

Other than that I still laugh inside when someone calls me Mrs xxx how can I be married?!

ParkheadParadise · 07/02/2018 23:13

It wasn't when I had my first child at 15.

When I got the keys to our house at 18, and we moved in I felt very grown up. I can still remember my mum asking if we would be ok on our own the first night we stayed there. That was 25years ago.

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