FUMING: To not want dd sleeping in dirty sheets

[Brokentopieces]

Dd8 stays in her dads for a night every couple of weeks. There’s being an ongoing issue with dogs in her bed which makes me feel sick. The 2 dogs always seem to be in her room (according to dd) and I’ve seen them myself on her windowsill when collecting her one day. The bigger dog staff terrier can open her door.
I’ve previously asked her dad to fix the door as she was coming home with a rash when she stayed there, he told me he had.
Last weekend dd came home saying when she woke up the dog was in bed beside her. This makes me feel so uneasy due to the complete lack of hygiene and safety issue. I have to admit I don’t like dogs but surely a child shouldn’t be sleeping with a dog. Her Dad’s house wouldn’t be considered clean and his hygiene standards are vile and he sends her home filthy with clothes I provide destroyed.
I tried to text him about it to say dd mentioned the dogs got in so maybe the handle is loose and all I get is attitude.
Dd loves the dog in fairness but AIBU?

Yanbu. He sounds neglectful tbh.

I would never leave a young child alone with a staffie. I know they can be lovely, but the problem is if they turn, they can be lethal. I think it’s something specific to the breed, to do with their jaws and how they lock down on things when they bite them..? Sorry, I’m a bit hazy on the details. My mum loved dogs, but even she was extremely wary of bull terrier breeds and of leaving young children alone with any dog.

The dog is not the main problem here. He's part of a bigger issue relating to neglect and hygiene. When you talk to ex, make it about the big picture. Mention the dog but don't focus solely on that topic. He can't accuse you of being fixated on one thing, then.

I wouldn’t let her go there.

If it's an overnight how does DD get filthy and smelly? Is she in nappies? I have RTFT but must have missed her age.

I watch my dog eat shit, rummage in a dead badger carcass , lick his arse and other dogs balls. I love him but no. Dogs don’t belong in beds.

Great post! 👏👏👏. But what you will get is people who have no idea what to do with their dogs but will feel superior because they allow their dog to share their bed 😏

YUK!!!

OP how old is your DD? A couple of people have asked, but I can't see your reply

I’ve always had large breed rescue dogs and some have slept with my children.

I would not let an adult who appears uncaring, lazy and neglectful make that decision when it came to my child. It could end really badly.

I understand you can’t stop contact unilaterally but I would urge you to give your DD a door stop, and teach her how to use it, so she can keep the dogs out of her room while you try and sort out the problem.

Sounds like a nightmare. You have my sympathy.

There is not a flipping chance my daughter would be visiting her father under those circumstances.
He sounds disgusting at best and dangerous at worst.

Right, so she’s 8yrs old and spends one night there every fortnight or so.

Did the dogs ever live with you and DD permanently? Or has she always been a visitor to their house.

Did the dogs ever live with you and DD permanently? Or has she always been a visitor to their house

OP days in a previous thread that her DD was the result if a one night stand and they have never lived with her DF.

OP how old is your DD? A couple of people have asked, but I can't see your reply

She's 8, it's the first word in the op DD8.

The dog sleeping in the bed wouldn't worry me too much, but with everything you say about his house, and that you won't even enter the house because it's so filthy, I'm surprised you allow your daughter to stay there.