Someone keep me sane? *potential trigger warning* baby in hospital

[NomsQualityStreets]

In hospital with DS2 (8weeks old) due to high temp yesterday. It went up to 39C at one point!

We've been here yesterday, barely survived the first night and I'm stuck for at least 2 more nights until all the results are back and they know what to do.

They're 99% sure it's not meningitis but want to wait until the cultures develop fully and are waiting for a few more tests to come back.
In the meantime DS is being poked and prodded and regularly put on an antibiotic drip, his feeds are being interrupted if he needs another dose or another check up, his cannula had started leaking into his hand so they had to take it out and we are currently waiting for another one being put in

He's irritable and won't be put down at all so I get precisely 0 rest.

I just want to take him home he's not been himself at all he's gone from a smiley gurgling baby to a sad, sleepy, crying one and my hearts breaking.

DP has the most important meeting of the year (his job depends on it) on the other side of the country so as of tonight I'm completely alone for the next 2 nights.

My dd had s ruptured bowel and end up with severe sepsis . They told us she was unlikely to survive as the sepsis was extremely bad . It was truly horrendous and seeing her so so poorly on intensive care is an image il never be able to erase from my mind . By some miracle she pulled through and we were so thankful . She has now got a lifetime risk of her bowel rupturing again and if she has even a slight tummy or back pain we are to immediately get to hospital . Her whole stomach is scars because they tried in 5 places to repair her bowel laparoscopically but then the surgeon just downed tools and did a full blown cut from top to bottom laparotomy as he said her whole abdomen was filled with puss and poo . She was so bloody brave and I still have bad dreams now about how poorly she really was . It was one of those moments that you never think will happen to your family . Literally she was fine one minute then in agony and being rushed to theatre the next ? Scary stuff but the NHS is bloody brilliant

DD had a nasty infection which required 3 days on IV antibiotics.

On the last night it was only us in the 6 bed ward. It was DH's birthday so the amazing (amazing x a million) nurses offered him a hospital bed. He was delighted after 3 nights of sleeping in the floor.

He was busy footering with the controls to make his perfect night when the nurses announced a family room had become available.

Watching my very tall husband trying to fit on the tiniest lumpiest soda bed in the world while pretending to be grateful for the family room still makes me laugh.

DD is perfectly healthy now but it's really tough OP. .

Ask for some sucrose to put on his dummy if he has one, while the cannula is being put in. Drs use wherever the best veins are. We don't like foot. cannulas. Especially when they are walking. Try and get chatting to the other parents. They may keep an eye on your little one while you have a break.

My favourite patient at work has been in 10 months. Her mum rarely leaves her side. We put our foot down and insisted she went on a pre booked holiday with her friends. Some kids on other wards have been in 2+ years.

Hope littleone gets better soon.

Hang in there OP- I was there with DD1 at 2 weeks old. They treated her for meningitis and sepsis as they didn't know at the time what it was and the number of lumbar punctures and canulas she had was truly terrifying at the time. I remember being too frightened the first night she was ill to go to sleep in case she didn't make it through the night.
All turned out to be ok in the end and she was in hospital for 6 days with a five day course of antibiotics. She's now 3 and a half and is just like any pre schooler.
A PP mentioned sugar water on a dummy. The hospital gave this to DD when they inserted the canulas and it really helped soothe her.
Wishing your DS a speedy recovery if you need a handhold to get you through the night we'll be there. Hugs to you both.

Hope you're ok op. I was in with dd2 for a week on iv antibiotics at 3 weeks old - as it turned out for sepsis. She perked up dramatically after 48 hrs (it was caught very early so she was never obviously very ill). I never went in for the canulas and lumber puncture, i was advised it would be very upsetting for me and that was the right decision for me.

Yy to finding a nurse to help out so you can shower, get some fresh air etc. I spent loads of time watching wimbledon or reading my kindle, and loads of cuddles.

Hope he's on the mend soon!

I spent a hellish time in hospital with my DTs after they were born and it is tough.

If your DS will feed while they take blood/put in cannulas etc it will help distract him. Also, try not to think about the whole stay looming ahead of you. Just take it a few hours at a time and you won’t feel too overwhelmed.

Sounds like it’s encouraging news with his temp though, hopefully you’ll be home before you know it.

I rememeber being in isolation ward with ds1 at 2wks. They kept forgetting to feed me but nurses were fab as they wanted cuddles as they never usually got small babies. It was utterly draining never leaving tiny room hardly for 2 weeks

I am a “frequent flyer” with both my kids and I’m actually in the hospital right now with my eldest! He’s autistic too and has been in sensory overload most of the day he tried to rip his cannula out It’s a new hospital and mostly private rooms now which helps massively. Hang in there OP I’ve been there, I’ve been in NICU I’ve been on general surgical wards while my kids go through surgeries and scans and invasive tests etc, I’ve cried I’ve moaned I’ve shouted etc etc. It DOES pass and as a Pp said when you do get home you settle back in quickly!
I hope your little one is better soon and from one hospital mama to the another xx

Agree with feeding or a dummy or a vial of sucrose to suck on while they do injections and tests. The twin who's unwell had to have hourly heel pricks done at one stage and those things helped tremendously (I think the sucrose things are really only used in nicu and scbu but it's worth asking - they gave me some to take home for his blood testing and I used some when they had their 8, 12 and 16 week jabs and they helped a lot, even if just as a distraction).

Also ask if they have any ceiling projectors, or if anyone is coming to visit ask them to pick you one up from Argos - the yellow star shape ones (think the brand might be Tomy?) are inexpensive and have a rotating image and lullabies, they really helped mine when he was in.

Thank you for all the replies again!

I couldn't write much last night as I was pretty much chained to the recliner chair trying to settle DS.
He has had 2 doses of antibiotics administered into his vein by the nurse at1 am and then 7am.
In between that at 3 am he was hooked up to the drip again for another 30/40min course of antibiotics.

He's been unsettled and only slept on me, I've dosed of for short bursts holding him here and there.
I'm still functioning ok today, managed to get dressed , take all my crap stuff off the bed as they'll be folding it soon for cleaning and pop out to the loo and to make a cup of coffee. He was crying as I came back but settled quickly enough.
He's currently half dosing off in the cot listening to some baby lullabies I found on YouTube. Bless him, I can't wait to take him home.

Hopefully this cannula will stay in until he doesn't need one anymore and we're just due for the antibiotics crosses fingers

Oh and to the posters who mentioned dummy/sugar solution/BF when it comes to any procedures. Unfortunately DS won't have it. As soon as someone touches his arm/leg etc he's pulling away and crying and nothing distracts him, I think he's just anticipating a needle prick or something else etc

Bless him. You made it through another night, a loo trip and coffee- result! Little victories. I hope you have a calm day, and good news about your DS and your DH.. And for later.

Sending good vibes you way, OP x

Thank you @picklemepopcorn and @SquareDot

He's currently asleep in my arms and hooked up to the IV. He's temp has been down since yesterday and he's been more alert today.

The Dr came and all his results are fine, they are just awaiting his bloods which should be back tonight. She said if all is well we might not have to stay another night.
I just need to get in touch with DP and let him know.

He's had some more bloods taken earlier and I'm sure he gave the nurse a dirty look when she was done!

If he is more alert and giving the evils, then that is great news! Hopefully you can get discharged soon.

It's a scary time, I know.
whenever my DS (now 2.5yrs old) is sick he gets a raging temp that we cannot control with Calpol/Nurofen. When we were in Majorca when he was 12m it soared to 41.9 degrees...then I was panicking. Packed a bag expecting hospital but they didn't take us in.
I have been in Childrens Hosp when he was a few months old as he had a temp of around 39 and bronchiolitis and really struggling with his breathing.
There is nothing anyone can say to stop you worrying, you are the mummy, it's inevitable. Just hang in there and take support when it is offered. Try not to over think or google xx

Hang in there, hopefully you’ll be home sooner than you thought & all the tests coming back clear is great news. My now 11 year old was in hospital as a new born & it is exhausting & stressful. Take care of yourself & make sure your DH gives you some well deserved “me time” when he gets back. Sounds like you’re doing an awesome job.

Get some advice on controlling his temperature before you leave. My kids ran to high temperatures, and threw up with calpol. We had two suspected meningitis visits, due to petechial (?) haemorrhage caused by high temperatures and vomiting in a very fair skinned child.

Hope he gets better soon op
Do they know what has caused it yet?

No news yet I probably shouldn't have gotten my hopes up.

Nurse said earlier he won't need another IV if bloods come back before 7 and are clear but as far as I'm aware IV is coming up soon.

Ah, poor little poppet.

Have you managed a break and a wash, yet?

It's so upsetting seeing your little one in pain and uncomfortable. But it sounds like they are really investigating all options which is the most important thing for him.

You've done 50% of the lone nights so you're doing great, hang in there!

Hopefully little man is getting stronger xx

6 months ICU parent here.
Sucrose on dummy works for a few days - they they get conditioned to sugar = pain . So be ready for it to stop working.
Don't hesitate to ask for pain relief , you do know best. Paracetamol in tiny ones is amazingly effective. They do have pain specialists if needs,a nurse called them in when the numerous consultants were focusing on rescuing him, to ensure he was comfortable.
For yourself no advice apart from talk and ask if you don't understand. Even if the medics have still not diagnosed, they should be guiding/informing you, we'll test for this....if by morning this has not happened we will review at....we're hoping that overnight they will show...
Get a lidded cup, they are allowed on the wards, find the parents room. If you can't bring yourself to leave the hospital / ward to breathe, use the parents room ( assuming children's ward), to make that coffee. Spend two minutes with parents who have been there longer, talk to the new parent just arrived to let them know when the breakfast trolley will arrive.All human contact is good when you are in that hell.

I hope you're ok OP and that your DS's results continue to come back clear. X