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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be terrified I might have cancer?

328 replies

Happyland88 · 27/01/2018 07:54

I have 2 Breast lumps in the same area of my breast. I’m 29 years old (was 28 when I found both lumps.

The doctor examined and said she wasn’t concerned (didn’t feel like cancer to her). This was about 6 months ago and I’ve found it hard not to worry even though I was given some reassurance.

One of the lumps feels like it may have got bigger and now I’m terrified.

If I didn’t have my two girls (aged 1 & 4), I wouldn’t want to get out of bed. I’m too scared to make a dr’s appointment. I don’t want this to be cancer. I’ve read that cancer in young women is very aggressive. I want to be around to see my children grow old.

I’m on my own as my husband works away, I’m just so so scared.

OP posts:
zizza · 31/01/2018 00:08

Good luck op! I had my first mammogram in November and was called back, found a lump, had a biopsy and was all clear (all within about 2 weeks) thank goodness. But I was convinced I had cancer! (I'm a medical secretary - were known to be hypochondriacs lol). I was all set for a year of treatment....

But - and I don't say this to worry you any more, just to show how important it is to get checked out - my friend died last year after being treated for cancer for nearly 5 years. She originally saw a locum GP about a lump and was sent her away with reassurance that it was probably fine. He should've referred her straight to the Breast Clinic to let them decide - not sure how he thought he could tell! A year later when she mentioned it to me because it had grown, she went back to her GP and it had spread to her lymph nodes. As I said, I don't want to worry you more as most lumps are benign, but it needs to be checked.

We're all here for you x

NeverTwerkNaked · 31/01/2018 00:18

How did today go?

Crumbs1 · 31/01/2018 00:58

Hopefully you’ve been referred so you can (hopefully) be reassured properly. Don’t be embarrassed by post baby breasts - a sign of love and creation. I’ve got very lopsided breasts now because I had surgery for breast cancer in 2009; it’s strangely liberating. I don’t care what people think now and happy to use communal changing rooms in a way I wasn’t before.
Not knowing is much harder than dealing with it. The treatment isn’t nice but is manageable and life giving. I’m in the too long ago to worry much about it group now. The only impact is one tablet a day.
Most lumps are benign.
Most breast cancers are treatable.
Most women survive well.

Izzy24 · 31/01/2018 06:20

Thinking of you today OP.

onestepforwardtenstepsback · 31/01/2018 06:46

De lurking to say good luck op.
You can do this just think of your kids they need a well strong mummy BiscuitThanks

lastnamefirstfirstnamelast · 31/01/2018 08:54

Good luck you can do this xoxoxo

MamaDuckling · 31/01/2018 08:59

Good luck! Thinking of you.

Cockmagic · 31/01/2018 08:59

Good luck op Flowers

yummycake123 · 31/01/2018 09:40

Good luck op

Original poster
Happyland88 · 31/01/2018 10:17

I’m feeling quite calm about it just now, I think it’s because you’ve all made me feel like I’m not alone with this and like you say, it’s likely to be fine. I’m feeling more positive than I was before. Thank you all.

OP posts:
octoberfarm · 31/01/2018 11:08

Glad to hear it. Good luck today, thinking of you!

Original poster
Happyland88 · 31/01/2018 13:00

Hi everyone, that’s me back home. The GP felt the 1st lump, which hasn’t changed and said that it’s very mobile and not something to be concerned about. The other lump, which used to feel exactly like this, she thinks has actually gone, rather than changed, and what I’m now feeling is the breast tissue underneath. Basically the breast tissue on my left boob and the breast tissue on my right boob feel very different in general and she says, the right one feels grissly and gravelly which isn’t necessarily a cause for concern. She’s seeing me again in 3 weeks where she will check again and if in any doubt will refer me to the breast clinic. At the next appointment, I’m going to ask her to refer me so that I can get some peace of mind. Thanks everyone, I couldn’t have done/be doing this without you all.

OP posts:
NeverTwerkNaked · 31/01/2018 13:04

Well done for going!

Rebeccaslicker · 31/01/2018 13:10

Well done OP. Sounds like you have a good GP there. If she had any real concerns, she would have sent you off to the clinic at once. As it is, she clearly doesn't but wants to be belt and braces, which is good.

I know it's not the 100% all clear that was going to make it all ok, but hopefully you're feeling much better about it as a start.

prettymess · 31/01/2018 13:12

Well done for going!

Dodie66 · 31/01/2018 13:13

You did it 😃 well done
I bet you feel a bit better now it’s been checked.
I think it’s a good idea to get a referral to put your mind at rest

Trailedanderror · 31/01/2018 13:14

Well done.

Original poster
Happyland88 · 31/01/2018 14:53

Thanks everyone. I’m feeling relieved. Just looking forward to the next appointment and hopefully getting the all clear for 100%.

OP posts:
Original poster
Happyland88 · 31/01/2018 19:48

Now that the kids are asleep and I’m alone with my thoughts, I’m worrying myself again. She couldn’t categorically say everything’s fine. That means that waiting 3 weeks could be a bad thing if there is something wrong? My thoughts are spiralling a bit. This is my anxiety getting the better of me, isn’t it? Sorry, I have no one to talk to IRL so I know I’m leaning on you guys a lot but bottling it up last time was crippling me.

OP posts:
MamaDuckling · 31/01/2018 19:51

Absolutely anxiety getting you here. Believe me she'd have you off with an urgent referral if it was anything worrying. GP's see breast lumps/bumps ALL the time - remember that and he reassured by it.

Well done for going in today. Get that referral in 3 weeks for your own peace of mind.

MarthaArthur · 31/01/2018 19:53

Oh op. Could you phone the dr first thing and explain you are unhappy and insist on a referal? Im not sure why she said wait 3 weeks when you already have had it over a year. Makes no sense. It will be ok but ypu will have to stand up for yourself a bit now. X

myrtleWilson · 31/01/2018 19:56

I think she's offering the follow up appointment for your piece of mind. If she had any inkling or concern that it wasn't all ok why wouldn't she refer to the clinic. I think the follow up is her way of saying "this is stressful, I know you're worried, so come back in 3 weeks" that said if you do want to press for a referral now then perhaps give the surgery a call and explain how anxious you are - the GP may say yes or she may come back to you and explain in a bit more detail what her view is. But above all, well done on attending today (I hope that doesn't sound patronising - I mean it genuinely!)

ScarlettDarling · 31/01/2018 19:56

Yes, this is your anxiety taking over now (fellow anxiety sufferer, I know how those thoughts can creep in and take over.) Your gp has been very reassuring. She isn't at all worried. She is going to follow this up to make sure you get a definitive all clear but for now you need to accept that what you've been given is the best possible outcome you could have hoped for today.

When I did CBT for anxiety, the therapist told me I had 'intolerance of uncertainty ', basically I can't rest unless someone can reassure me that everything is going to be alright. Unfortunately life doesn't work that way. Is your anxiety only based on this issue or has it been a problem for you before this? If it has, it might be worth seeking some help for that (once you've got the all clear for the breast thing!)

Jigglytuff · 31/01/2018 19:58

There is nothing wrong with you. You need to tell your GP you have anxiety. Please do - I can't imagine how awful and crippling this is for you. But you don't need to feel this way

zizza · 31/01/2018 20:59

Sorry, but I still think she should refer you to the Breast Clinic. You can't tell what a lump is just by feeling it. Even the doctor I saw at the clinic - who sees lumps every day, couldn't tell what it was without further investigations. I'm so glad you went today and I'm glad you're feeling better about it, but do consider asking for a referral.