How old for social media?

[Acloserlook]

My child is y6, is this too young for Fb?

Kids have it at 6?!?? My god

No, OP said year 6 - that's aged 10 - 11.
Still far too young. DS2 is year 6, and he's not allowed any social media yet.
Some in his class do, doesn't mean he's getting it any time soon.

Id say 14 or 15 minimum

I’ve had a Facebook account for years and nothing dramatic has happened it isn’t a demon
But you are an adult and not vulnerable to online bullying and grooming like a 10 year old girl. Jesus. If I knew DS' friends had accounts at that age I would be reporting those accounts to get them shut down. It's so inappropriate.

I’ve had a Facebook account for years and nothing dramatic has happened it isn’t a demon

Right but you're an adult with adult FB friends, presumably?

You desperately need to inform yourself in the potential problems of SM for teens/tweens before you make a decision. Either to know why you're delaying or to know how to limit the risks for her and advise her.

”all the kids seem to have it so I didn’t want to be the one who said no!”

Perfectly ok to be that one. Kids aren’t emotionally equipped to deal with social media at 10/11. The age restrictions are there for a reason. No risk of them being able to set up accounts anyway as long as the restrictions are correctly set up on their phone.

Some of DS1’s (year 6) friends have YouTube channels! Utterly bonkers of the parents imo.

www.internetmatters.org/hub/research/social-media-guidance-for-parents-and-carers/

www.nspcc.org.uk/preventing-abuse/keeping-children-safe/online-safety/

www.nspcc.org.uk/preventing-abuse/child-abuse-and-neglect/grooming/

www.theguardian.com/society/cyberbullying

How do parents expect kids to say no to peer pressure for things like drugs and sex, when we cant say no or set limits?

I let my DD have it when she went to senior school. It was great for keeping in touch with her primary school friends.
A friend's daughter went to a different secondary, and was adamant that her daughter wouldn't have FB until she was 13. Found out her daughter had missed out on lots of social engagements at her new school because it was all arranged on social media. Friend relented.
I don't think it is an easy decision to make. I was lucky, in that I knew my DD to be sensible/trustworthy etc and am confident that she would've come to me had there been any issues.

My DD is in Y6 and she just has Whatsapp to talk to the other girls in her class, they have their own little "girl group" on there where they talk about anything from their dogs to having dinner with their nan, nothing major but I have the odd snoop just to be safe

Look at parentinginfo.org for the rules on min ages for the various types of social media and how to keep your child safe online.

Sometimes you have to be the one who says no.

DS: “All my friends have GTA, why can’t I?”
Me: Because it’s not appropriate

An Other Mum: my DS said your DS had it, so I thought it was ok.

Don’t believe them when they say ‘everyone’.

My niece went on social media at 12 and was immediately told by quite a few men they'd like to fuck her hard.

Monitor, monitor and then monitor some more.

My niece went on social media at 12 and was immediately told by quite a few men they'd like to fuck her hard.

[shocked] haven't her parents heard of privacy settings?!

DS: “All my friends have GTA, why can’t I?” Me: Because it’s not appropriate

My argument with 10 year old now who says his friends all play 18s and why can't he play anything like that?
Me - because you're not old enough, there's an age limit for a reason, and they shouldn't be on there either but I'm not their mum am I so can't tell them not to.
If little Johnny jumped off a cliff,would you follow?!"

I'm harsh or tight as they'd call me lol

Jesus Christ. I work in educating parents and children in schools about social media and I'm sorry but your attitude is one that makes me want to bang my head repeatedly on the table.
NO child under 13 should have any social media at all, even if they do feel left out.

Facebook has a recommended age restriction of 13+.
It is there for a reason, as are many of the other age restrictions for a lot of applications.

Six is way too young for any kind of social media, whether or not you feel your daughter maybe left out.

The app Musical.ly is an excellent resource for paedophiles the world around with its gyrating pre-teens desperate for likes and "insta-fame". I've recently been to a conference where the head of the Interpol department for trafficked and abused children was almost punching walls due to the lack of parental supervsion for children online at stupidly young ages.

Your experience on Facebook is no way comparative to what your six year old will experience. Links to all kinds of inappropriate content are easily accessible, a six year old has no concept of what images are appropriate to post online, who she should choose as friends etc.

There is such a thing as a digital footprint that follows you around online. This is a collation of all your online activity. As a parent it is your responsibility to sensibly manage this for your child till they are of an age to understand the consequences of what they post.
Online history is increasingly used for jobs, universities etc to review and determine what kind of person you are. I can't imagine having such a detailed record of all my life availble online for all to view from age 6, and having to clean it all up later.

Social media is proving increasingly damaging to the mental health of the young, with the constant need for validation- concerns about numbers of likes, what they look like in comparison to other photo shopped images etc all proving hugely detrimental especially for females. Anything more than 2 hours a day on social media will seriously mess with your head.
Even a private account at 6 on Facebook is mental.

And if you are going to do this anyway, for Gods sake put something like Qustodio on her devices so you can track what she is doing, and make all accounts private with location services switched off.

Missed the Year 6 bit. If she's 13 ish okay.

Private accounts, Qustodio, location services off, no devices in bedrooms, no devices at night after a certain time, no Yubo, No Sarahah, No musical.ly.

Monitor randomly and insist on being her friend. Instruct her on what to do if she receives inappropriate friend requests and familiarize yourselves with the array of detailed privacy and security settings that are available.

So happy I misread and she is not 6!!!

Ds peers where this age when they got there, just before starting high school, we have linked Ds to our phones so we have full access to his accounts, not that there is any trouble or anything, we have fell lucky with his friendship group.

The problem is that for all the people saying ‘Jesus christ’ On here, in the real world, all of DS’ class have snapchat, Instagram, Facebook, and so on, and he’s being left out of stuff which I can see getting worse as he enters secondary school. I’ve suggested Pinterest which seems more benign but he’s disgusted

[shocked] haven't her parents heard of privacy settings?!

Yes, which is why she was only allowed on age-appropriate sites and her traffic was monitored. Didn't stop the men from making accounts and accosting children.

Are you sure it’s his whole class?! They do have a habit of exaggerating:

“Muuum I’m the only one without it! They’ve literally ALL got it!” etc

One of DS’s (14) best friends doesn’t have an XBox so he’s not in on the nightly games they play. Doesn’t seem to have affected the friendship at all.

I am more concerned about my DD being on social media than my DS, for a myriad of reasons.

The one I really put my foot down with with DS and allowed last when he was 13.5 was Snapchat, as it’s almost impossible to monitor as nothing stays on there for any length of time.

So I’d def avoid that at age 11.

I was (and, to some extent, still am) that parent who said no. Lots of dd's friends got Instagram and Snapchat in year 6, but I felt it was too young and held out. She wasn't thrilled, but it didn't damage her friendships and she accepted that I had my reasons.

I am not rigid about it. I have made it clear that I'm open to negotiation and persuasion, but ultimately, each request will be decided on its own merits. The argument that everyone else has got it won't sway me at all - I'm not responsible for everyone else's children!

All the other kids are smoking pot, make sure yours doesn’t feel left out.
I’ve never had any problems with it.

You are the parent op! I’m not sure why you have asked because you clearly aren’t fussed about the answers.

The argument that everyone else has got it won't sway me at all - I'm not responsible for everyone else's children!

And it's one I distinctly remember using myself at that age as well ;)

(And my mother's reply, which involved bridges and jumping!)

All the kids I work with in a children's residential unit have fb. I work with 12 to 17 year olds. However FB rules are a child has to be 13 to set up an account. We don't allow our 12 year olds on it until their 13th birthday.