If you wear a short skirt then you should expect eyes to be drawn to you...

[coconuttella]

I don’t mean that if you wear a short skirt or tight top that it’s ok for men to gawp at, catcall, stare at or intimidate you... it absolutely isn’t, but isn’t it natural that if you wear something that visually accentuates your assets, that you should expect men (and women)’s vision to be drawn towards them? Or should men (and women) always resist the temptation, and not let their eyes stray even for a moment?

HoneyDragon where has anyone suggested slapping a man just for looking? The general consensus is that it's fine to look, not ok to stare (even kids are taught that staring is rude), make comments or touch. Do you think that's asking too much of men or something?

Can’t complain about the arse ogling IpGirl I’m led to believe it can be seen from space, it rather draws the eye (and small planets> into its orbit.

*Do men have "assets" by the way?

Of course they do... bum, chest, arms etc. Many men will wear stuff which shows them off.*

But my question was more about if they're described as such. I just don't think I've ever seen a man described as "flashing his assets" or something along those lines.

I didn’t say I would slap men.

I said smiling perverts which is a equal oppurtunities gig.

Legs are indeed a really important asset. What with walking and all.

brains

eyes

hands

behold the asset-packed human body.

My DH often turns the bottom of his jeans up a tiny bit a la hipsterville.

He believes in the power of a nicely-turned ankle.

*I didn’t say I would slap men.

I said smiling perverts which is a equal oppurtunities gig.*

Yeah ok, avoid the point.... Where has anyone suggested slapping ANYONE, just for looking? Does that make you happier?

hey look at the tigger hat, i'm sure she's happy enough!

Exactly Angels.

'He's so sassy and feisty. Flaunting his steriod-enhanced curves, he knows exactly what he's doing doesn't he! Like a big sassy sexy slice of man ham pulling out all the stops to wiggle out of the ham shop on somebody's arm' - said no one ever, especially the last bit where I went a bit mad.

I'm pretty sure Honey's reply was tongue in cheek.

I'd only notice a short skirt if she had particularly beautiful or ugly legs. Or if it was a bright colour or her shoes stood out in some way.

I'm not sure people notice legs much. When I wear shorts I don't notice people looking more than if I wear trousers.

Yeah ok, avoid the point.... Where has anyone suggested slapping ANYONE, just for looking? Does that make you happier?

I said it. At no point did my statement imply, infer or categorically state that anyone else suggested slapping people and or men.

FizzyGreenWater Ha! Man ham! Exactly, you just never see it do you?

I wonder if a guy showing off his assets would be told he was asking for it, if he was harassed by a group of gay guys.

Nothing wrong with a look or a glance. I do it myself .
It gets creepy when my 16 year old DD is walking around, and men old enough to be her dad or grandad stop and stare straight at her.
Or decide to go and talk to her, wtf?

Not sure why the OP has been referred to as a GF - does it matter where she's going with this? Let her go if she wants, and respond to that if it happens.

To answer the question:
isn’t it natural that if you wear something that visually accentuates your assets, that you should expect men (and women)’s vision to be drawn towards them?

Yes, it's natural. Yes, that's why men and women do it in the first place.

@coconuttella The point being that if you wore a tight, short skirt, people will be more drawn to that than if you wore a baggy trousers...

Somewhat depends on the trousers, no?

I like to display my sexy pins at all times, even in a blizzard. I was told that us girlies were created to be decorative and bring joy to the hardworking menfolk who do such a good job supporting us.

Honeydragon your post absolutely does imply that. It suggests that any women not happy being stared at are over reacting. You maybe didn't mean it that way, but it absolutely implies it, and I think you know that full well.

Coco, yup the motivation and intent is shown then, and something tells me They ain’t stopping to say your dd has a fantastic beanie hat.

Cocolepew, god yes, I think the most I got catcalled etc was between the ages of 12 and 18, and I looked young for my age. Creepy as hell.

Not at all. There are many reasons that men and women will stare at you and you have to ascertain the Why before the judgement.....hence I mentioned the tigger hat, because the motivation for looking at me is an acceptable one.

The op is stating that it’s a case of either ALL looking is either acceptable or unacceptable by using a short skirt as an example.

It was tongue in cheek, because no one should have to dress with expectations of others in mind.

Now go on and admit you like my hat

One bloke who had to be 70 asked if he could touch her belly ring, just because he'd never done it before,
because young ladies never had them in his day.

There's a difference between a look/glance and a lingering/intimidating/judgemental stare. Everyone looks but most people (I hope) are respectful enough not to stare.

HoneyDragon I get your point, but this post was about looking lustfully (for want of a better word) surely? Otherwise why focus on "assets" rather than people just looking at you in general? I think most women are fully aware of when a guy is leering at their legs, compared to someone admiring their hat/coat/shoes.

I was wearing a summer dress once, very hot day, and a guy actually stopped me in the street by standing in front of me, and putting his hands on my shoulders. Then he looked down at my boobs and said "very nice" before walking off. I'm really not going to kid myself that he was complimenting my dress.

And yes, I like the tigger hat .

My eyes are drawn to lots of things - nice clothes, bad clothes, bright clothes; dull clothes that suck the joy from their surroundings; handbags; shoes; briefcases.
In fact, just today, I was waiting at the traffic lights and noticed a man with a slightly battered brown briefcase. I wondered how old it was and what he was carrying in it. Before he left the house, I bet he thought 'this will definitely draw people's eyes when I'm out' . . .or not.