To think 2 glasses of wine per week won't do any harm?

[Poptart4]

I fully expect to be eaten alive for this post but here we go...

I'm 4 weeks pregnant with my 4th child. With my first 3 pregnancies I didn't touch a drop for 9 months and all dc were perfectly healthy. However I have watched people, friends/acquaintances, binge drink every weekend through out their pregnancies and their children were also perfectly healthy.

To be clear i would never binge drink while pregnant!

But I have been thinking that maybe 2 glasses of wine max on a Friday evening won't do any harm.

What do you think? Anyone else done the same? Did it harm your baby?

thierry
I didn't see the deleted comment you posted I assume you said something about my comment regarding smoking while pregnant?
I didn't report your post

Two glasses of wine per week is fine, but not in one evening, is my view.

Two small glasses of wine during the course of a week is okay, two medium/large glasses in one evening, I'd caution against.

Pedro

I said as above and then i also mentioned an unpleasant experience where i was in a place where i witnessed a pregnant mum headung for a smoke bold as brass, 20 pack of cigs in hand and when she came back she was nasty to her little toddler who had spilled a drink. She called the child a nasty name and i called her a vile woman in my post..... im not apologising for that. She was awful.

Someone didn't like it.

Im being genuine when i say i dont know what i said to justify it bring deleted.

I can't see why it was deleted either thierry

It depends how big the glass is.

Think of it in terms of units of alcohol.

A 250ml glass of wine contains 3 units of alcohol, so two 250ml glasses of wine is the same as six single gin & tonics.

I didn't drink when I was pregnant. I would have blamed myself if something had gone wrong and it's not that long to be without booze.

I read your post but didn't report it.

Personally, I read it and thought it was rather sneering dismissing addiction as bullshit I believe? Assuming that every Mother who smokes is lazy, selfish and vile then adding in a (totally irrelevant) example of one woman who does not represent the whole population.

Smoking doesn't cause shitty parenting.

What's the point?????? You will never forgive yourself if something goes wrong. PLUS it will make it all the more enjoyable when you finally can again!!!

But why? Can't you last nine months without a drink? It's an unecessary risk.

But do you actually have and know friends who binge drank throughout their pregnancy?! That seems nuts to me.
I think a small glass a week would be fine once past 20 weeks, but that is just my own personal opinion. I probably had about 8-10 glasses throughout each of my pregnancies and they were 125mls. Never planned, always sporadic

Yerauntfanny

I recounted an experience i had which i was horrified at and which has stayed with me for years. Yes i was horrified watching her heavily pregnant and smoking .... that woman was vile... she had utter contempt for her existing child. In a snapshot of watching her i did judge. She was horrid to the child. She had another on the way no doubt awaiting the same fate, disinterest and shit parenting. Maybe i have had a sheltered life but there will never be a day where i think we should all be ok with that.

Im perfectly entitled to mention that. There are many many people on here and in an long thread a lot of opinions / observations / advice / comment is given .. you are no more entitled to comment than me.

I dont agree with you ....smoking whilst pregnant is selfish.

And by the way ... a mother who smokes is VERY different from a pregnant woman who smokes.

I also said pregnant mothers who continue to smoke in pregnancy knowing the WELL PUBLICISED risks had their priorities wrong. I am not apologising for that. I said there would be people coming on banging on about addiction blah blah blah i think were the words i used. I didnt and dont think that justifies smoking in pregnancy. It wasn't sneering.

Sometimes people need to stop dancing around crap like this.

Smoking when pregnant is wrong. I wont apologise for my opinion.

Why should she last 9 months without a drink. The research available generally points to low level/moderate drinking having no significantly negative impact on outcomes. There are whole generations of people behind us whose mothers drank far more than we now consider acceptable in pregnancy. The human race has so far not fallen.

It's martyrdom

Also I've spent 17 months out of the last 29 months pregnant. It's not 'just' 9 months.

Well. That was a slight over reaction 😂

1. You didn't say she was pregnant. You just said a vile woman. I double checked as I wondered if she was pregnant or not.

Where did I say this was okay? I said it was an irrelevant example, which it was because it bares no relevance to the thread subject.

1. Where did I say that you were less entitled to comment?

1. Where did I say I agreed with smoking in pregnancy?

1. See point one, you didn't distinguish between the two.

1. Who said you need to apologise?

Talk about over dramatic ffs 😁

Personally i wouldnt. I miscarried my first baby and tortured myself over the wine i had drunk before knowing. The logical part of my brain knew it wasnt that, the scan was pretty clear what it was but that didnt stop my self loathing.

Hopefully i would be more relaxed if i get to get pregnant again but right now thinking woukd i, i wouldnt.

Wow, you double check when the post was deleted?? To be clear, I did say she was pregnant. You are wrong there. I could ask MN to reinstate my deleted post to prove the point but guessing they won't.

You didn't read the post properly.

You didn't say this but your post suggests you think that.

You didn't but you didn't read my post properly where i talked about 'a pregnant woman' smoking whilst you only read 'a vile woman' smoking. Confusion ensues ...

1. See above.

1. Was thinking MN looking for an aplogy not you 😂 there will be a long wait.

FFS from me.

I double checked it at the time as I thought I misread it.

I posted how I read your post, at no point did I make any suggestion that smoking in pregnancy was fine nor would I condone it. Just to be clear!

Are you really so desperate for alcohol that you can't stop drinking for a few months to protect your child? Perhaps that's a bigger issue than whether it's safe or not.

Are you really so desperate for alcohol that you can't stop drinking for a few months to protect your child? Perhaps that's a bigger issue than whether it's safe or not

That's really rather unpleasant.

Most women can make use of the vast amounts of information available to them and make an informed decision.

But why bother unless you have a drinking problem. It's selfish. Roll eyes and excuse it if it makes you feel better about the alcohol you consumed when pregnant. You got lucky.

Generic 'you' btw.

People will do whatever they want as is their right but don't expect not to be judged by others who disagree as is their right.

You got lucky

I don't understand this bit. Do you mean anyone who drank any amount of alcohol while pregnant, or people who abuse it during pregnancy?

@Bellamuerte
"Are you really so desperate for alcohol that you can't stop drinking for a few months to protect your child? Perhaps that's a bigger issue than whether it's safe or not."

Do you ever go faster than the speed limit while driving? Or use your phone? Have you ever let them go in car with a driver who didb;t care about speeding or using their phone? Were your babies ever left with a smoker? Did you allow a smoker to pick them up when they were small? Do you live near a polluted road? Has your child ever had a sweet? Did you breastfeed your baby until they were two? If/when you used formula did you always follow the precise instructions and never cut a corner?

Life is about assessing and balancing risks. You cannot avoid all of them. Wanting one or two small glasses of wine a week does not make you an alcoholic.

Personally I drank very little when pregnant because I was a smug PFB saint during my first and knackered after that. But I knew the evidence didn't mean total abstinence was the only option.

I lived in France when pregnant and it's really hard to stay away from wine there. I would have a small glass of red wine with a meal maybe once a week and one time i had two small glasses in an evening - and on visiting England i had a Guinness because the iron is supposed to beneficial for the baby. This wasn't a regular set weekly thing though, this was the odd time through pregnancy. I think if your going to do it then stick to red wine and definitely no sorority or anything - this is your decision to make though x

Just realised I didn't make sense - wasn't always once a week it was probably when I had a steak or something which wasn't every week. Also I meant steer clear of spirits not sororities

I never had a drink in my pregnancies but if I did definitely not in the first trimester.

I had the odd glass of wine every now and then in both pregnancies - only in the second and third trimester. Perhaps the occasional G&T.

I had them because, for example, I love the taste of chardonnay and pinot gris, and nothing quite beats a G&T on a summer's evening.

It's nothing to do with getting drunk, it's about liking the taste of something, that happens to have a side effect of inebriation IF you drink too much of it. That's a big 'if'.

My personal viewpoint was that the risk of having the odd glass here and there was vanishingly small. Small enough for me to be perfectly comfortable doing it. When I weighed it up against other risks I took when pregnant, I felt confident that this particular action was less likely to result in a negative outcome than other 'risky' behaviours I also chose to indulge in (like driving a car, or going on the underground, or dying my hair, post-first trimester, etc, etc).

I felt comfortable with my decision then, and feel equally comfortable about it to this day.

For some reason this enrages some people, who can't seem to get their head around the fact that the reason a lot of people drink wine is because it's delicious (I don't really drink any other alcohol other than G&Ts because I don't like the taste of them). I grew up in a wine-growing region - the reason people make and consume wine is because it's the nectar of the Gods! Yes, I could have abstained from it completely, but there was no need to. 🍷