POO KNIFE vs TOILET BRUSH

[BattleCuntGalactica]

Ye olde poo knife thread..

Given the voracity of opinions on the poop knife, I wonder if Mumsnet js pro knife, OR more in favour of the traditional loo brush?

Link to poo knife on amazon

I mean to me, a loo brush is for cleaning the bowl after you've flushed to remove any bits that have stuck to the bowl, not for dividing a terribly large turd. You cannot properly clean a loo bowl with a knife alone. AIBU to suggest that if things are to be effective we must have both?

What do we think, Mumsnetters?

@Ifailed I really need to learn not to read this thread whilst drinking, because my poor dog just got sprayed with juice. 😹

Wouldn't scissors work better than a knife? Maybe a pair of those chicken shears things - if they can cut through bones a shit python isn't going to defeat them is it?

This thread is giving me excellent resources for new swears. SHIT-PYTHON.

Thank you @Waspnest. 👏🏻

Ah, this is still going. Excellent

I have a strange and contrary feeling at the moment: I have reached quite an advanced age now (49), and have never ever had to chop up a jobby, not once. Not mine nor DHs, nor any of the 5 DC's . And I'm feeling oddly jealous of those who have, and who see a need for a poo knife.
Perhaps I'm just feeling a little left out of this party.

Oh, good lord, why did I come in here?

backs out quietly

pops head back in Don't need anything like that in the Chow house. Fortunately.

I suggest more fibre.

Battle Tbf I've never had this problem either. Perhaps it depends on the design of the loo?

Washing up liquid and a bucket of hot water. I started a thread about it.

Here:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/housekeeping/3128824-Toilet-unblocking-hack?msgid=74514049#74514049

It's surprising no-one has invented some kind of toilet macerator yet, like you get on fancy kitchen sinks.

Once when I was on heavy antibiotics I had to designate a coat hanger for the job. I tried to flush it with buckets of water.

I had to use a cheese slicer at a Boyfriends (who lived with his mum) and smuggle it to the bottom of the bin, she was still talking about "the cheese slice that mysteriously vanished" when we split up.

Ifailed MY MUM HAD THAT TOILET! #happymemories

Can you imagine the mess after stick blending?

PerfectlySymmetricalButtocks Great! I'm rather liking the idea of a full on brown suite in the bathroom, toilet, bath hand-basin, fuck the cleaning. But.......

😂

Presumably you'd only use the stick blender for the loose ones that float on the top of the water?

You'd probably just end up with a neat pan of soup.

Bartholin, aren't Saniflo toilets basically macerators? (Although I think they're renowned for getting blocked so probably not to be recommended.)

You'd probably just end up with a neat pan of soup. Flushable soup, which meets the objective.

saniflo toilets are macerators, yes. I know cos I have one in my downstairs loo. It's a right pain. Landlord's idea though. They can be properly noisy as well.

A macerating bog? And you wonder about poo knifes? Macerating bog is to poo knife what Ferrari is to bicycle!

That's so becoming my email signature! 😂

pax - I bloody love you. LOL

Wouldn't it be great if toilet manufacturers (hope you are listening Mr Armitage Shanks), made u-bends which are capable of coping with when the biggest and meatiest of turds

Surely this should be part of the design process

Workplace toilets seem to be the worst IME in not being able to effectively flush even the most routine sized poos

And cheap fucking toilets installed by tight fucking landlords. Not our landlord, oh no.