In wondering when the hell everyone lost respect for relationships?!

[hellogoodbye1]

Happily married to dh. Have a young ds.

Yesterday no less than THREE men came on to me.

All of them are friends with dh too! All have wives/ long term partners.

What the fuck is wrong with people? I feel like people are giving less of a shit about this kind of thing these days.

When I had a go at one of them he told me I should have felt flattered not angry. Wtf?

They aren't great friends but we occasionally socialise.

hellogoodbye I really wouldn't bother, people here seem to be hell bent on making you out to being a fantasist.
When I was younger my boyfriend at the time had two best friends. They both tried to kiss me in one night. They were and still are arseholes.
Why would anyone "boast" about this happening? I was mortified

Is it possibly a fetish of your dh and he's told them to do it??

@TattyCat I think the most offers I ever got in one night was many moons ago when I went out drinking in Swindon.

Maybe your husband said something so complementary about you to all 3 that the all chanced their arm, as were jealous of him and how sweet you are.

It's sort of like because your husband is happy with you they wanted to pull you both down to their level.

I once rejected someone in a very nice way, and next thing I know he was telling lies about me, so I called him on it in the middle of the bar, while my partner was next to me, he said he had been In our bedroom so I stood there and demanded he tell everyone the colour of our walls curtains and the size of the bed, he had to back down and admit he had lied.

God no! Dh isn't like that.

He's annoyed and it's probably made him feel like shit too but it would have felt REALLY wrong not telling him.

If it were the other way round and he didn't tell me it would probably make me suspicious.

Dh and I have made a monumental effort to get on really well recently. We had a rough patch a while back and have both put a lot of time and thought in to making things better.

Maybe it is like a bit of a red rag to a bull.

Can't see anyone thinking I'm sweet though lol. I can be a bit of a nightmare at times

I know affairs happened years ago but I don't feel like there was the flagrant disregard for being in a committed relationship. Or being a bloody friend either.

"I've put on a shit ton of weight recently and am actually very surprised anyone would make a pass!"

Perhaps they thought you are having a drop in your self esteem, so thought they might have a shot.

I don't think that it's ever been any different, there is just more opportunity to communicate with each other. Past generations had to rely on seeing each other.

@Birdsgottafly that could possibly be it. Ugh. How very bloody depressing.

This is kinda bizarre. The OP says this unlikely thing happened to me and I am upset about it so peeps tell her it is unlikely so she must have made it up.

I hear you OP. I’ve not had a reduction in ‘come ons’ since being married. I recently blocked a business owner from whassap and texting as he began harassing me for a date after I’d gone into his shop and used his service.
I had gone in with two of my children, my wedding ring, AND I was six months pregnant. I was not flattered, I was fucking annoyed especially after I has pointed out the above facts and he carried on anyway.

Not long after I took delivery of a breast pump and the stupid delivery guy came on to me (unless telling me I looked beautiful, when was baby due? husband a lucky man and was I happy with him? Sure I wouldn’t consider a secret drink with him) is me being deluded and flattering myself.

And my DH cousin and my best friehds partner getting drunk and making sexually suggestive comments on my BLOODY WEDDING DAY to me.

So yeah, I get you. It’s fine and (sometimes) flattering when men come on to you in other circumstances but the total disregard for relationships is rude, it puts everyone in an uncomfortable position, it paints men in a very bad light and it doesn’t in any way make me think I’m attractive or sexy. It just makes me feel like I look like a cheap, available, desperate idiot who must be gagging for meaningless sex with not very attractive men (no supermodels banging down my door I’m afraid).

@streetlife70s yes! It's not at all flattering. I'm questioning if I'm giving off some weird vibes but I'm pretty sure I'm not!

It's disrespectful to everyone involved and sad.

It's the arrogance of it too that's so infuriating.

I believe you O.P. It happens. I think the internet has changed people's, particularly men's, perceptions of women's availability in all sorts of ways and allowed more opportunity too.

I agree Decoy. It all feels a bit ‘Tinder’ now in RL. When I was young and said ‘I have a boyfriend’ that was that. Now lots of men seem not to care as all they are after is a bunk up anyway. It certainly doesn’t give me a high opinion of myself and I’m pretty sure OP feels the same as, let’s face it, men are not generally picky about fuck buddies. But it does make me feel even less trusting of men in general when they don’t seem to value relationships, either their own or other people’s.

"Of course they did dear."

Man, posters on here can be shit. No one ever comes onto me but I believe you, OP.

I'm 53 and have DDs in their 20s. There hasn't been a decrease in this sort of behaviour, sadly. We swop tales of men behaving badly.

Yes I don't think I can remember a case years ago when I'd have to say more than 'I have a boyfriend' and people wouldn't back off.

Now it's also like you aren't taken as seriously. almost like a no isn't as strong a word as it used to be.

It does make me feel sad for younger women.

some men will always be arseholes. Women will be told we're liars, fantasists, up ourselves.. the list goes on..

OP, I'm sorry, my original comment further up the thread pretty much sounded like I was accusing you of making it up. It had made me think of a former colleague who got the wrong end of the stick in nearly every interaction with another human (always convinced people were flirting when they weren't, or shouting when they hadn't raised their voice, or giving her dirty looks when they weren't).

But from your subsequent posts it's clear that if someone messaged you, there's not much room for misinterpretation.

I'm hoping your DH will now be cutting these friends out of your lives? No one needs 'friends' like that.

The time I had more than one person make a pass at me was when I had severe sinus infection and my face was swollen I was genuinely baffled why they preferred no makeup and infected to my usual made up healthy face it was slightly depressing

Are you Samantha Brick??

i cackled very hard

It speaks volumes for men and their attitude that 'I have a boyfriend' was the way to get them to back off. Would they have accepted, 'Sorry, not interested'?