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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

New nanny is 35 minutes late

86 replies

Iloveanimals · 20/01/2018 11:40

Got in touch with a new nanny this week through an agency and we arranged to meet today to see if she was suitable for the role.
She is now 35 minutes late and has not been in contact. Obviously I don't want to rant and rage because I don't know her circumstances and I'm trying to be understanding. But 35 minutes late really? Is that acceptable or aibu???
My twins were excited to meet her too. It is snowing but not sticking, has this influenced her decision? But surely she'd contact me???

OP posts:
Saracen · 20/01/2018 12:09

I think you'll have to wait and see whether she has a good excuse. IMO it would have to be a really major catastrophe to qualify as a good excuse.

ForalltheSaints · 20/01/2018 12:09

Good luck in your search for another nanny. Unless something such as a car crash has happened, no reason not to phone.

PippaPug · 20/01/2018 12:10

I’m a Nanny and I will let a family know if I’m even a minute or so late (which hasn’t happened so really because I really dislike being late so leave very early!)
It’s very unprofessional of her to not even contact you and say she is ill/changed her mind etc

listsandbudgets · 20/01/2018 12:13

If she can't turn up on time for an interview, I suspect she stands little chance of turning up on tie when you're in a rush to get to work.

There would have to be a seriously good reason. Unless there's been something very unexpected on the roads then traffic is no excuse as most people who want to do a job set out early for the interview and hang about drinking coffee in the local area just to be sure (well that's me anyway!!)

ThisLittleKitty · 20/01/2018 12:14

I would call in advance to say I wAs running late so no not good.

JessieMcJessie · 20/01/2018 12:14

I was going to say that traffic and not being able to use phone was a possibility but looks unlikely now.

Would be interested to know if you ever get an explanation. Sounds like you dodged a bullet.

TheUglyFive · 20/01/2018 12:15

Friday night drinks and had a few too many?

Buxtonstill · 20/01/2018 12:16

I hope she hasn’t been involved in an accident. I would be very concerned if there is a minor reason and she did not bother to contact you. I wouldn’t be employing her in that case.

Ebb · 20/01/2018 12:18

Reliability is key in a nanny. Doesn't sound like she is so that would be a no go for me.

Yukbuck · 20/01/2018 12:19

Really unprofessional. I'd always call if I'm running late but to be honest it's only happened once and it wasn't for an interview. We are all human but being this late is ridiculous.

Mooey89 · 20/01/2018 12:20

I suppose there could be a genuine reason, but I’m trying to think what could happen to me to make unable to call/text and this late for a job interview...

BewareOfDragons · 20/01/2018 12:20

You would be entrusting your children to her. If she was genuinely stuck somewhere, she should have contacted you.

ObscuredbyFog · 20/01/2018 12:23

It is snowing but not sticking

What transport is she using to get to you? Has she never driven in snow before? If she's using public transport has it been cancelled or is it running late?

Whatever the difficulty she is having, she should let you know. She's too flaky, you need someone reliable and this one just is not.

Original poster
Iloveanimals · 20/01/2018 12:43

She's a driver. That was one if the reasons she looked so good for us to take the kids out etc

OP posts:
tiggytape · 20/01/2018 12:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Iloveanimals · 20/01/2018 12:56

Yeah I'm trying to not make judgement until I know she's OK.

OP posts:
MissDuke · 20/01/2018 13:04

Hope shes ok. Seems more likely she just changed her mind which is very rude!

ChocolateWombat · 20/01/2018 13:17

I think I would try to for e a response in this situation.

I might ring and also text and leave messages saying I was really worried that she had been in an accident and please could she get in touch to reassure you.

And then I would enjoy saying how disappointed I was that she was unreliable and hadn't even communicated - both key characteristics of a Nanny, and I would be telling the agency and suggesting they didn't keep someone without these qualities on their books.

Unreliable people need calling on it.

blueshoes · 20/01/2018 13:23

Timekeeping is essential for a nanny. I have not hired people because they were late for an interview and provided a dubious reason (of course the trains were up the spout). Agree with other poster that it is a sign of flakiness and requires a swerve.

bridgetreilly · 20/01/2018 13:23

I'd have expected her to contact you if she was going to be more than 5-10 minutes late. Stuff happens, but a text or phone call is important.

AnnieAnoniMouse · 20/01/2018 13:27

With the fact it’s snowing, if not sticking where YOU are, I’d be worried, not annoyed.

Plus, I’d feel like a massive bitch if I’d been whinging on MN about her being half an hour late and she’d been in an accident.

I hope she is OK and just unreliable. It’s good to weed them out early if that’s the case.

Original poster
Iloveanimals · 20/01/2018 13:30

Yes annie that's why I've said I'm not making judgement until I know she's OK Hmm

OP posts:
SandyDenny · 20/01/2018 13:33

Is she driving to you? Are there any road issues on the way, maybe she doesn't want to risk using her phone to try and contact you?

Original poster
Iloveanimals · 20/01/2018 13:36

She's two and a half hours late so... Don't know. We'll see if she gets in touch.

OP posts:
Yukbuck · 20/01/2018 13:46

Do you have her number ? Look on her WhatsApp and see when she was last active.