Regarding DC referring to parent by their first name

[TempusEejit]

My teen DSC have recently started calling DH by his first name. He doesn't like it and much prefers being called Dad (and has told them so) but they still do it.

I know some kids address their parents by their first nameswhich is obviously fine for them but it doesn't sound "right" to me (or DH) but I'm not really sure why! And yes we know that if this is all DH has to worry about then he's doing ok

But leaving the triviality of this issue aside I'm curious as to what others think, and any ideas as to how DH should address this his DC?

But people are saying they will be crushed, devastated, that it's cruel etc. so if they communicate that to the child it will sound like a giant guilt trip.

If they say 'I'm refusing to do X, y, z for you because you won't address me by my preferred title' then it will become a power battle.

If the parent just says 'I would prefer you call me mum/dad' then I agree, no guilt trip or power battle there. But a lot of posters on this thread are advocating trying to force the children, either by making them feel so guilty that they give in, or by withdrawing help/favors etc until they give in. That's what I'm objecting too.

and like it or not, there are definitely some parents who are actually cool, whose kids also think they are cool. That may grate on some less cool parents, whose kids do not think they are cool, but it's still true.

Ps I'm not saying am one btw! But I definitely know some cool parents who also have cool kids and they all think each other are cool and they manage to do it in a way that isn't at all excruciating...that's partly what makes them cool!

The dad in question has already done that, the OP said that he had said he didn't like it when the child first started calling him by his first name. Perhaps if he'd been a bit more forceful it would have stopped then. As it is it sounds like the children have got into the habit of not calling him dad and it will be harder to change. I think it is perfectly reasonable for him to sit his children down and tell them how he feels. It's important to be honest in relationships and I think would be good modeling to his children. Although given that one of them asked for a name change which his dad supported I think it's a bit hypocritical of them to be so insensitive.

and I would expect the outcome would be that either the children give a good reason for the name change which their father is OK with, or they start calling him dad again. Either way it will stop festering.

When mine did it I started calling both of them Child.

I was surprised when my ex-partner referred to his parents by their first names, but he said that's all he had ever called them, from when he learned to speak. I called my mum, 'mum' but referred to her by her first name when talking about her to my siblings, and they did the same.

My DD calls me by my name and has done since she was about 2.
She had a period of calling me mummy for a while inbetween though.

Her reasoning was with two other children I tend to block out the "muuuuuuum" sound.

My sister tried this with my father as a teenager.

He basically told her if she didn't call him Dad/Daddy then she'd have no parent related perks and only her basic needs would be met.

She called his bluff - it wasn't a bluff and after 4 weeks of no lifts, no TV access, no money, no treats etc she backed down and called him Dad again.

Funnily enough she got really upset when one of her children tried doing the same...although they were less stubborn and caved after one day of no wifi