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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Do I get more money?

304 replies

bridgetjonesmassivepants · 14/01/2018 10:31

Can't work this out. I've changed a few details so it's not very identifiable and posting here for traffic.

Recently my mum died and my sister and I were left with £150,000 between us. (Bungalow had already been sold as mum had just moved into a nursing home) Will says everything is split between us two. But, my sister had a loan for £8000 from mum when she sold the bungalow to buy a car, she had only paid back £1000 of this when mum died.

Question is, how is the £150,000 split taking into account that sister has got an extra £7000?

OP posts:
NeverTwerkNaked · 14/01/2018 10:59

She only got a “free car” because her mum died after all. Plus half that “free car” is paid for from her share of the inheritance

Bluetrews25 · 14/01/2018 10:59

Your DM wanted the money split evenly, but your DSis has already received a good chunk in advance, so that needs to be balanced out in the final sums.
She owes the estate, if DM is no longer around.
Discuss it with her.

Pengggwn · 14/01/2018 10:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pinkmagic1 · 14/01/2018 10:59

Sorry for the loss of your mumFlowers. Please don't bring this up. This was something between your mum and sister from before her death. I think it would be in very poor taste to bring it up.

BewareOfDragons · 14/01/2018 11:01

How would your sister treat you if she was the executor?

Would she deduct the amount you still owed from your 'half'? If so, deduct it. If not, don't do it.

burnoutbabe · 14/01/2018 11:02

you need to take into account the loan as an asset of the estate for declaring things to HMRC/probate. So that would be £157k.

Then you split it 50/50 with you getting it all in cash and her getting x in cash and rest in not repaying the loan.

Not mentioning it may mean you make the wrong declarations to HMRC/Probate forms.

(My parents loaned my sister money towards house purchase and its noted in the file where they keep copies of their wills so its 100% transparent that it would be taken into account in any 50/50 split of estate, assuming not repaid)

HJ40 · 14/01/2018 11:03

Peng the executor can definitely inherit. Often in simple wills e.g. death of last remaining parent, DCs are both the only executors and beneficiaries. You have to swear an oath in front of a solicitor that you will disburse assets in accordance with the will before you're allowed to access anything and are legally liable for any misdemeanours/fraud.

IDSNeighbour · 14/01/2018 11:03

I can't imagine even bringing this up, to be honest.

My sister currently owes my mum about £10000 from a house deposit loan. I don't own my own home.

But, if my mum died now (not that she has much to leave) I don't think that money would even enter my head. Plus my sister is closer to me than anyone else and I wouldn't want to risk her thinking I was crass or grabby at the time of a bereavement. It wouldn't be the claiming of the money that would upset her, she'd be fine with that. It would be the calculating callousness. If she was the executor and remembered, I'm sure she'd even it up automatically. If she was the executor and didn't remember, I wouldn't remind her. If I was the executor I'd split it evenly and if she remembered and brought it up, great. If she didn't then I wouldn't.

You have £150000 to split!! What's £7000 amongst all that?

AlpacaLypse · 14/01/2018 11:04

@Pengggwn The executor can inherit, it's the two witnesses to a will who can't.

Notsoaccidentproneanymore · 14/01/2018 11:06

If I was in the position of being the sister with the car loan, I would insist on my sister having the £7K more, so i would get £71,500 and you would get £78,500.

Pengggwn · 14/01/2018 11:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lougle · 14/01/2018 11:07

Was the loan out of the £150,000 proceeds of the bungalow, or incidental to the bungalow? If it's part of the proceeds, then the estate is £150,000, with your sister getting £68,000 and you getting £75,000. If not, then agreed with others that the estate is £157,000 with your sister getting her remaining loan written off and £71.5k, and you getting £78.5k.

burnoutbabe · 14/01/2018 11:10

Honestly, you can't be executor and just decide to forget assets "as its crass" - that's fraud!

maddiemookins16mum · 14/01/2018 11:11

I'd let the solicitor dealing with the probate sort it out acoording to what the will says and the paperwork for the loan.

MidnightExpress1 · 14/01/2018 11:12

This wouldn’t be on my mind if I had just lost my Dm

ilovesooty · 14/01/2018 11:12

I would like to think your sister will acknowledge the loan.

And telling the OP to grow the fuck up is pretty unkind in my opinion.

Dungeondragon15 · 14/01/2018 11:14

I think that it is easy to fall out with siblings when a parent has just dead. You are both grieving and possibly won't be thinking in a rational, reasonable way. I personally would avoid arguing so in your position so I might mention it once and then drop it if she doesn't agree to paying it back.

diddl · 14/01/2018 11:15

Wouldn't the £7,000 be a debt to the estate than would be taken into account with Op's sister paying it from her half?

AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered · 14/01/2018 11:15

@Violletta you should actually be getting £9k less than your siblings, otherwise they're subsidising your loan...

Witchend · 14/01/2018 11:16

Everyone seems to be assuming the sister will be awkward and refuse to acknowledge the debt. There's no evidence of that, she may even have asked the OP to work it out assuming the debt.

NoCanoe · 14/01/2018 11:19

I'm depends on the will and any caveat that money given before from inheritance should be reduced.

Nanny0gg · 14/01/2018 11:21

Doesn't matter about the will as such.

Same situation in our family and the loan had to be taken into account first. And it wasn't in writing either.

Who's the executor?

Original poster
bridgetjonesmassivepants · 14/01/2018 11:22

This is why I didn't want to be executor. I did mention to mum that I wasn't maybe the best person to deal with finances but there wasn't really anyone else as I live close by and sister is in Canada.

Like a few of you have said hopefully sister will tell me to take her loan into account and that avoids the whole issue.

OP posts:
Nanny0gg · 14/01/2018 11:22

You have £150000 to split!! What's £7000 amongst all that?

It's virtually 10% of the split...

Olympiathequeen · 14/01/2018 11:23

Just speak to your sister and ask her if she wants to repay into the estate (from the estate) the remainder of the car cost to make the division fair.

If you detect a resistance or resentment just drop it and tell yourself it was a gift and unimportant. I do understand the ‘fairness’ issue but in the grand scheme of things, it’s minor.

If she wants to make the division equal just deduct £7K from her share.